Oh, okay then...
Assassin's Creed - get it only if you try Crackdown but find that having outrageous awesome fun isn't your thing, and you want to watch lots of cut-scenes and push 'up' lots instead. But teh graphix!! etc.
Beautiful Katamari - eh. Mixed feelings about this. It's okay, but it's not half as much fun to play as I imagined it would be. YMMV etc.
Bioshock - if you liked System Shock 2, you'll like this etc.
Bullet Witch - an average third-person shooter. There are better ones on the 360. About as good as the hideously overrated Earth Defence Force 2017 though etc.
Bully - massively overrated in my opinion, but still decent. Buggy and with shit controls, mind. Again, YMMV etc.
Crackdown - awesome, vertigo-inducing climb-em-up. With guns and rockets and cars and multiplayer and co-op etc.
Burnout Paradise - er, I don't particularly like this. But everyone else does. So it's probably just me being a hideous twat and trying to be different and difficult just for the sake of it etc.*
Call of Duty 2 - the second-best one. Not as good as Infinity's Ward's critically-acclaimed Call... etc.
Call of Duty 4 - The single-player is still entirely shit and desperately overrated - to play, that is. But it has a couple of awesome playable cut-scenes that tend to overshadow this. It's a bit good online etc.
Cars - I like this, though I seem to have encountered some kind of infuriating bug whereby I can't 'progress'. I think. A kid's game really, but a
good one. It has different race types, including NASCAR and straight-up Burnout-style dashing about, all linked with a charming-enough free-roaming world. Or, to be lazy, it's Burnout Pixardise, Grand Theft Pixar etc.
Civilization Revolution - Excellent. Doesn't have the depth (and so probably not the longevity) of the mighty, mighty CIV** but it's definitely good - it's just different. Far faster-paced than its PC predecessors, I'm eagerly awaiting some other cunt buying it so that I can completely crush and dominate them. In real life, etc.
The Club - Mehh. It's alright. Definitely worth a tenner, I'd say, but not particularly captivating. It *is* interestingly different though. I'd say it's the closest that the 360 has to a silly, balls-out 'adult' shooter like Max Payne, Max Payne 2 etc.
Dudley wrote:
Flatout Ultimate Carnage - Absolutely brilliant carnage filled adventure game. The main game is probably more a continuation of the Burnout series than Burnout 3+ is
This, etc.
Forza 2 - It's the best 'realistic' driving game that I have played, definitely, yo. Take that as you want to, YMMV again etc.
Dudley wrote:
Grand Theft Auto 4 - The best GTA game certainly, many of SA's problems are gone at the cost of very few of its good points. The driving is good, the shooting is better, the main character is likable and the story almost comprehensible. - 9/10.
This, again, etc.
Halo 3 - a decent single-player game. A fine multiplayer game (the 'IT'S COD4 OR NOTHING!' brigade are very wrong, but that's what happens when you forget how to play something properly
). An absolutely fucking superb 4-way co-op game, played on 'Legendary' difficulty, that absolutely everybody should play through at some point, with three Bezzies watching their backs and checking their six. In real life, etc.
Conan - very decent barbarian-em-up. Although, it does have frustrating bosses, and it gets sucky towards the end. Just like real life, etc.
Fight Night 3 - For a last-gen port, this is a still fine-looking game, and very amusing and playable, especially when drunk and on multiplayer - but also very entertaining and compellingly difficult in single-player. Any game that lets you 'be' Muhammed Ali is worth a few quid IMO YMMV etc.
Frontlines - it's sort of like splendid PC online multiplayer series Battlefield, and indeed the team origianted from a Battlefield mod. However it's just not popular enough (when I played it), leaving to impressively large and potentially interesting maps that are empty and boring. Plus, you can't 'do' voice-chat with Bezzies, without twattery,and then not properly. Stick with Infinity's Ward's critically-acclaimed Call... etc.
Quote:
Ridge Racer 6 - Sublime [...] Takes a while to get tricky but has super track variety and a massive career mode. Also online. As a launch game you can probably find someone who'll sell it for the price of a Starbar and as such - 9/10.
again, again, etc.
Gears of War - the most homo-erotic game I've ever played (though still not as romantic as The Darkness, alas). It's good, but with Halo 3, COD4, and the like, there's not really a place for it IMO YMMV LOL etc.
Star Trek Legacy - Erm. Plus points: it has WILLIAM SHATNER's voice. It is initially, superficially pretty and stuff. Plot-wise, it's not bad, and it's a decent 'cap' on things. Negatives: everything else. Over-complicated and sluggish controls, repetitive audio, actually quite crappy graphics (such as when destroying anything big - it just looks shit), hour-long missions that can be fucked up and require restarting in the final minutes, no WILLIAM SHATNER's face etc.
Guitar Hero II - excellent fun, still the best Guitar Hero game. You'll love slapping your whammy to Tattooed Love Boys. In real life, etc.
Mass Effect - deathly dull conversation-em-up. Mildly amusing for me because I met GazChap (in dim lighting, at night, whilst tired) the night before getting it, and the lead bloke looks exactly like how I remember GazChap looking. You spend the game either staring at his face, whilst engaging in dull chats, or staring at his arse whilst he minces about. I've heard from Craster and others that the story is good, and so I'm willing to believe it 'gets good' Just not in the TWELVE FUCKING HOURS that I gave it. Not worth it even for the jiggly buttocks, etc.
Oblivion - it's an RPG! If this is the sort of thing that you think you'd like, then you'd probably like this, etc.
The Orange Box - Less worth it since nobody*** plays it on-line anymore for Team Fortress 2. But if you like Half-Life 2, or want to give it a go, then fuck, y'all are gonna have a real swell time now y'hear? And, it's definitely, actually, really worth getting just for Portal alone. There is no cake, etc.
Prey - A perfectly fine quake-style FPS. Y'know - a bit lumbering, more about shiny engine than fast gameplay at times. But, but, it's actually, good, too! The wall-walking, perspective-distorting, head-fucking portals business is superb too, and an excellent companion piece to Portal. Gets bonus points for using (Don't Fear) The Reaper to atmospheric, slightly spine-tingingling effect. Plus, you can shoot tiny, crying ghostly children. In real life, etc.
* Nah.
** Civilization IV. CIV. I love that.
*** Bezzies