The Grot, Grumble and Scud thread
Probably NSFW pr0n babble
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How unusual! Rough anal fucking, eh? :P
Bobbyaro wrote:
Don't know about you guys, but I like it, and maybe Gill will, also. :)
http://link.brightcove.com/services/pla ... 1728524001


Just saw a trailer for this film! It is called Jennifer's Body and is about a high school girl (Megan Fox) and her 'plain Jane' friend (Amanda Seyfried). Megan Fox is some sort of possessed serial killer and it is being billed as a black comedy cult teen classic. Seems to have been released in America to pretty mixed reviews but I am blind to such negativity when I know that at some point, for whatever pointless gratuitous reason, two hot girls make out on a bed. :luv: I'm so shallow.
How did this get under you radar? Fox gets her norks out.
Grim... wrote:
How did this get under you radar? Fox gets her norks out.


I have no idea how I'd never heard of this before except for that clip Bobby posted. I am excited! Is norks an English word? i don't think I've ever heard anyone say it except on the TV.
Gill, seriously, you need some Abby Winters stuff.
MetalAngel wrote:


Well within acceptable parameters.
GovernmentYard wrote:
Gill, seriously, you need some Abby Winters stuff.

Where?
Gill, If you torrent, register for Empornium, and get any Abby Winters video on there. Remember to upload at least as much as you download or you won't be getting anything from there for very long.

There's also this lot: http://www.torrentz.com/search?q=abby+winters

and here's a couple of low-rez samples, not her best work but you get how it isn't your usual trashy shit.

http://www.empflix.com/view.php?id=28665
http://www.empflix.com/view.php?id=31535

Failing that you can come down and watch some with me.

Remember to change hands once in a while.


/edit Gents - you could also do worse than check this stuff out.
superdupergill wrote:
GovernmentYard wrote:
Gill, seriously, you need some Abby Winters stuff.

Where?

Abbywinters.com , oddly. It's the only porn I have ever and would ever pay for. Putting my money where my mouth is, like. MISTER BOUNDER etc. Pretty, normal women enjoying sex and so on, on their own terms, well filmed, with no music or bullshit setups or fake 'casting' bollocks, and no misogynistic fuckwits guffawing and yeehawing all over the place. And they're a decent company, too, insofar as it's possible to tell.

I really don't get it when people watch a film because some pretty woman and/or a lesbian scene is in it. Women kissing can't still be that big a deal, and besides, y'know, porn.
sinister agent wrote:
I really don't get it when people watch a film because some pretty woman and/or a lesbian scene is in it. Women kissing can't still be that big a deal, and besides, y'know, porn.


Women kissing is fucking excellent. It's hardly going to make a film worse, is it?
GovernmentYard wrote:
sinister agent wrote:
I really don't get it when people watch a film because some pretty woman and/or a lesbian scene is in it. Women kissing can't still be that big a deal, and besides, y'know, porn.


Women kissing is fucking excellent. It's hardly going to make a film worse, is it?


It is if it's gratuitous, and done purely because the film maker hates and despises you but wants your money.
Isn't all kissing gratuitous?
Yep, that's why the porn I watch never goes beyond a nice cup of tea and possibly a brief peek at some etchings.
Craster wrote:
Yep, that's why the porn I watch never goes beyond a nice cup of tea and possibly a brief peek at some etchings.


And that's why we're never going to the museum again.
Unfortunately I think a lot of what this all comes back to is personal taste

You may really like things to happen this way , and I may not

One image or scene may .... "flick your switch" and it do nothing, or really annoy / upset someone else.
I like naked ladies.
I note the Gill hasn't returned to this thread yet.

Must be busy.
Lesbians don't do it for me, to be honest.
I'm not sure why.
Grim... wrote:
Lesbians don't do it for me, to be honest.
I'm not sure why.


:this:

I find it attractive and hot an' all, but it doesn't really do a lot for me. I haven't said this before, and hopefully I won't say it again, but "I need cock." Ugh.
Malabar Front wrote:
I find it attractive and hot an' all, but it doesn't really do a lot for me. I haven't said this before, and hopefully I won't say it again, but "I need cock." Ugh.

Hahaha that. I wasn't going to be the first to say it, though.
Try transsexual-on-girl action, then. It's girls... with cock.
Grim... wrote:
Lesbians don't do it for me, to be honest.
I'm not sure why.

I don't really get why guys seem to love lesbians so much when girls don't have the same fascinations with gay guys. I obviously love them though.
Things like this are just asking to go into a .sig :-)

Malabar Front wrote:
I find it attractive and hot an' all, but it doesn't really do a lot for me. I haven't said this before, and hopefully I won't say it again, but "I need cock." Ugh.


I'm the opposite - i really couldnt care less for the male parts on screen its the ladies i want to see , and i *hate* the way that 'current' adult American films have gone , i'm quite happy watching 70's / 80's / early 90's films but beyond that they get ..... well its not stuff i want to watch.

And I'll quote myself because :

zaphod79 wrote:
Unfortunately I think a lot of what this all comes back to is personal taste

You may really like things to happen this way , and I may not

One image or scene may .... "flick your switch" and it do nothing, or really annoy / upset someone else.


I'm glad that SDG has found something she likes and there are terrabytes of Abby Winters stuff out there to see (i should know i've seen plenty of it)
zaphod79 wrote:
I'm the opposite - i really couldnt care less for the male parts on screen its the ladies i want to see , and i *hate* the way that 'current' adult American films have gone , i'm quite happy watching 70's / 80's / early 90's films but beyond that they get ..... well its not stuff i want to watch.

It's not that I like looking at the boy bits, it's just that, you know, when I have sex, there's always a man there.
Hahahahah :D
Grim... wrote:
It's not that I like looking at the boy bits, it's just that, you know, when I have sex, there's always a man there.


"Yes, that's right. Fist her, little dwarf. Fist her."
Grim... wrote:
zaphod79 wrote:
I'm the opposite - i really couldnt care less for the male parts on screen its the ladies i want to see , and i *hate* the way that 'current' adult American films have gone , i'm quite happy watching 70's / 80's / early 90's films but beyond that they get ..... well its not stuff i want to watch.

It's not that I like looking at the boy bits, it's just that, you know, when I have sex, there's always a man there.
Hahahahah :D


Is it Jeeves? :D

Also, I agree.
Grim... wrote:
It's not that I like looking at the boy bits, it's just that, you know, when I have sex, there's always a man there.
Hahahahah :D

Joans wrote:
Is it Jeeves? :D

Also, I agree.


Is it Dimrill ?
Somewhat reluctant to press the "this" button in here.. but yes.
superdupergill wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Lesbians don't do it for me, to be honest.
I'm not sure why.

I don't really get why guys seem to love lesbians so much when girls don't have the same fascinations with gay guys. I obviously love them though.


Meh, I've met a fair few women who are into watching two men going at it.

I think it's basically because men in porn are invariably irritating, embarassing retards, and whenever there's a bloke in the video, there's never any contact other than clumsily, indifferently groping and tugging at the woman's tits and arse and vadge, and prodding the same parts with their cock. With women, on the other hand, it's much more common that they'll actually get into the sensual aspect of it. Plus they kind of have to be more creative because if there's a cock on screen, they can just focus the camera on it and tell the women to do something with it. Porn makers invariably see men as simply a cock, and simply having someone play with one is apparently enough of a spectacle that they don't need to bother doing anything else.

Also, part of the reason people enjoy porn is the projection aspect - watching a man get off is hot to men because, y'know, they can pretend it's them. When he speaks up, though, you're suddenly associated with whatever retarded misogynistic shit he dribbles out, and that's just too insulting to be fun.

Also, women in porn tend to talk slightly less pathetic shit to each other than men do to women. "YEYAH BAY-BEE. LOOKIT DEM TIDDIES. YEYAH LOOKIT DAT. YEYEAH LEMMIE SEEM DEM TIDDIES. LOOKIT DAT PUSSIEE. YEYEAHH WOW YEAAAH." Criiinge.

I do quite enjoy making people uncomfortable by pointing out that they've almost certainly seen and masturbated to more strangers' cocks than the entire female population of their street.

Oh, and I read an interesting idea (I think by Glenn Duncan) that men (not all, obv. Probably not even most) really only enjoy watching lesbian porn because they know the women don't actually enjoy it and only do it for the money (ie: for their entertainment/because a man is telling to). It's theoretically just a power thing. Judging by the shit porn makers put women through, never mind how transparently most porn stars fake everything, it's a compelling line of argument.
Grim... wrote:
Lesbians don't do it for me, to be honest.
I'm not sure why.

You haven't asked nicely enough
Men in porn seem underexposed to me. That is to say, they are basically a mechanism for introducing 'the cock' into the equation. Now, there is nothing wrong with the cock. The cock is good. This thread goes to show that men, women and chi everyone who identifies as gender-neutral can and most likely do like the cock. Straight porn - cock. Gay porn - double cock (and theoretically double the fun). Transgender porn - the cock is the point, both literally and figuratively. Lesbian porn - cock takes a holiday.

But what you never see in porn is men having sex in any way other than purely as a machine to power the cock. There's one exception, which is where blokes get 'done' with a strap-on, however in such cases the women are simply taking on the role of a typical male porn bloke.

Where's the porn involving one or more sirs who get into it in any kind of way that could be comparable to the realistic, intimate and downright fucking excellent grot produced by the Abby Winters stable, be it straight, gay or whatever? There is gay porn out there where a modicum of intimacy is shown as opposed to the regulation bully ramming that sort of business usually entails, but never in 'straight' porn and despite wishing to be more sexually diverse than I am, I'm fundamentally a straight bloke and that small percentage of 100% man grot that tries a little tenderness isn't going to do it for me, more's the pity.

Of course, were such a thing to be produced, it'd be erotica or simply videos of sex, as opposed to porn. Even amateur porn tends to be people trying to be porn stars. Fair play to them, mind, especially the lookers. I'd be bereft if a day came where gorgeous women weren't up for videoing themselves getting reamed and sticking it on the internet. Let's be honest, if you are all that looks wise it's a bloody disgrace if you don't.

We should probably try making some BeeX porn and show the rest of the world how it's done.
GovernmentYard wrote:
We should probably try making some BeeX porn and show the rest of the world how it's done.


Lets not, and say we did, eh?
GovernmentYard wrote:
We should probably try making some BeeX porn and show the rest of the world how it's done.

Petition to erase this thread from history.
You speak for yourselves, I'd look brilliant in it.
Don't forget to send your audition entries with a stamped self addressed envelope.
I'll be Riley Steele.
Dimrill wrote:
I didn't download it to find out in the end. Plackky num nums >:|

It's actually quite funny :)
Maybe so, but if I want to watch ugly women massage tesco bags full of liquid I'll watch the tramp down the road who collects her urine.
I don't enjoy seeing too much of the guy in porn... I don't enjoy seeing a man noshing out a woman, close ups of his reactions to things happening, or too much of him kissing her. Hence why lesbians triumph. Not least of all because you don't have to watch some guy's hairy ass crack going up and down.
Hey, don't knock the men in porn. I learned how to go down on women from them. Granted, it only taught me what NOT to do, but it's a start!
Malabar Front wrote:
Hey, don't knock the men in porn. I learned how to go down on women from them. Granted, it only taught me what NOT to do, but it's a start!


Surely you should learn by watching what women do to other women? Which apparently is spit on their arsehole before cramming a 12-inch black-ribbed nobbler up it.
That all went into the "don't do this" pile, if I'm honest.
Ha, it's true. Porn is a great guide on how not to have sex. I feel genuinely sorry (and quite worried) for girls growing up now, though. It was probably bad enough before, with most boys not een knowing where the clitoris was, but now it's more like 'actually, slapping your cock about on there is about as exciting as it is dignified'. And don't even get me started on the expectations some of them must have now. Sob.
To paraphrase Dara O'Briain: Today's kid, being porn-reared, will have real trouble when they grow up.

"Doctor, we can't conceive."
"What are you doing?"
"Well, I do her up the arse for 15 minutes and then spunk all over her tits. Am I impotent?"
According to my little brothers, this is pretty much correct.
I really should've checked the thread before I went blindly clicking on video links.
Bobbyaro wrote:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lg9BsN5Hf00&feature=player_embedded

MOAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Oh my.
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