Actually, I've been mostly listening to BBC Radio 4.
Two - well okay, four things:
1:
to CUS. We still love you CUS, just go for a walk in the park and relax a bit, matey. 
2:
That was an excellent joke, and I can't wait until my fellow music librarians get off lunch so that I can regale them with it.
3: Fair so again Ant. Even with Dimlies it's tricky to gauge someone's feelings online, and a cruel trap on close-knit forums is that you assume people get your style enough to not misunderstand - which can go disasterously awry. And while CUS does use ambiguity to excellent effect sometimes, other times it makes people's heads hurt. Like in above case. Hope you get stuff happily achieved, whatever it is that you're working on!
4: Phew. I'm in no mood for heavy conversation right now. I've just been giving a half hour helping calm down a bipolar customer with a bundle of confessions to get off his chest. Nice guy, but sometimes this social care aspect library work can be taxing.
1:
to CUS. We still love you CUS, just go for a walk in the park and relax a bit, matey. 2:
Zardoz wrote:
Q/ How do you turn a duck into an American Singer/Songwriter?
A/ Put it in an oven until its Bill Withers.
A/ Put it in an oven until its Bill Withers.
That was an excellent joke, and I can't wait until my fellow music librarians get off lunch so that I can regale them with it.
3: Fair so again Ant. Even with Dimlies it's tricky to gauge someone's feelings online, and a cruel trap on close-knit forums is that you assume people get your style enough to not misunderstand - which can go disasterously awry. And while CUS does use ambiguity to excellent effect sometimes, other times it makes people's heads hurt. Like in above case. Hope you get stuff happily achieved, whatever it is that you're working on!
4: Phew. I'm in no mood for heavy conversation right now. I've just been giving a half hour helping calm down a bipolar customer with a bundle of confessions to get off his chest. Nice guy, but sometimes this social care aspect library work can be taxing.
nervouspete wrote:
4: Phew. I'm in no mood for heavy conversation right now. I've just been giving a half hour helping calm down a bipolar customer with a bundle of confessions to get off his chest. Nice guy, but sometimes this social care aspect library work can be taxing.
I thought CUS was banned from the library after he was found on the internet connection looking at pictures of Debbie McGee?
Friends only? I hate most of the people on here, and they hate me. I think.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
Friends only? I hate most of the people on here, and they hate me. I think.
Apparently you are worse than Hitler.
Although Hitler did have a small dog who he was kind to. So it's not all bad.
I can prove I've been listening to Radio 4. That duck joke was on last week's News Quiz, I believe. Masquerading as a platypus joke.
Duck Joke:
Malc
Hi Piers wrote:
Email circulation has the story of three women who die together in an accident and go to heaven. St. Peter tells them there is only one rule: don't step on a duck. But there are ducks all over, and one woman does step on one; as punishment Peter then chains her to a really ugly man for eternity. The second woman tries hard, but later steps on a duck and gets chained to another extremely ugly man. The third woman tries harder, and manages to avoid doing it for months. Then Peter comes and chains her to the most handsome man she's ever seen. “What did I do to deserve this?” she asks. The man replies “I don't know about you, but I stepped on a duck.”
Malc
Erm... "Why, I remember this lad I used to know, back in the day.
Always used to get my goat, how he was always taking the mickey outta the McCawley kid. Now sure, the McCawley kid was a bit... strange, not bad now, just kinda... different. Anyway, he was always going on about this or that, and heck, to be straight with you we just di'nt know what he were talking about sometimes. But every once in a coon's age, he'd say something that'd make ya go 'Well shoot, now why di'nt I thinka that?!' and curse but he-he, he sure was a weird one.
Too weird, see, for this lad I used ta know. Now, this lad I knew - Roland was his name - was the son of a prosperous sugar trader. And sure, he knew things about things, and what about what, he was no slowpoke. But he sure did like to tease the McCawley kid. Why? Well, turns out one day that this McCawley kid got the uh, M - E - N - T - A - L - A- T- I - O - N. Yessir and to be honest witcha, it did kinda explain a heck of a lot about just why he was so doggone loopy.
But still, Roland sure did like to tease McCawley for having the head creeps. He kept bringing it up, and McCawley kept gittin' upset and saying that heck now, it just ain't fair for Roland to be a-teasing him like that. Not when see, this little settlement of ours is s'posed to be all about not doing that kind of shit. See, that's s'posed to be right out.
McCawley now, he di'nt like that. Nosir. Whatcha s'pose he done - get a gun and kill McCawley? Bash his breads out with a tire-iron? Gun him down in his Cadillac - naw, course not. Because McCawley mighta been kinda like a rook in a pigeon's nest, sure, but he weren't a bad kinda guy. Just kinda... di'nt know when to hold his peace, when he oughta just held his piece instead haw haw haw!"
Or something.
Always used to get my goat, how he was always taking the mickey outta the McCawley kid. Now sure, the McCawley kid was a bit... strange, not bad now, just kinda... different. Anyway, he was always going on about this or that, and heck, to be straight with you we just di'nt know what he were talking about sometimes. But every once in a coon's age, he'd say something that'd make ya go 'Well shoot, now why di'nt I thinka that?!' and curse but he-he, he sure was a weird one.
Too weird, see, for this lad I used ta know. Now, this lad I knew - Roland was his name - was the son of a prosperous sugar trader. And sure, he knew things about things, and what about what, he was no slowpoke. But he sure did like to tease the McCawley kid. Why? Well, turns out one day that this McCawley kid got the uh, M - E - N - T - A - L - A- T- I - O - N. Yessir and to be honest witcha, it did kinda explain a heck of a lot about just why he was so doggone loopy.
But still, Roland sure did like to tease McCawley for having the head creeps. He kept bringing it up, and McCawley kept gittin' upset and saying that heck now, it just ain't fair for Roland to be a-teasing him like that. Not when see, this little settlement of ours is s'posed to be all about not doing that kind of shit. See, that's s'posed to be right out.
McCawley now, he di'nt like that. Nosir. Whatcha s'pose he done - get a gun and kill McCawley? Bash his breads out with a tire-iron? Gun him down in his Cadillac - naw, course not. Because McCawley mighta been kinda like a rook in a pigeon's nest, sure, but he weren't a bad kinda guy. Just kinda... di'nt know when to hold his peace, when he oughta just held his piece instead haw haw haw!"
Or something.
You have the head creeps, CUS.
I think most of us do, to some degree.
CUS wrote:
Erm... "Why, I remember this lad I used to know, back in the day.
Always used to get my goat, how he was always taking the mickey outta the McCawley kid. Now sure, the McCawley kid was a bit... strange, not bad now, just kinda... different. Anyway, he was always going on about this or that, and heck, to be straight with you we just di'nt know what he were talking about sometimes. But every once in a coon's age, he'd say something that'd make ya go 'Well shoot, now why di'nt I thinka that?!' and curse but he-he, he sure was a weird one.
Too weird, see, for this lad I used ta know. Now, this lad I knew - Roland was his name - was the son of a prosperous sugar trader. And sure, he knew things about things, and what about what, he was no slowpoke. But he sure did like to tease the McCawley kid. Why? Well, turns out one day that this McCawley kid got the uh, M - E - N - T - A - L - A- T- I - O - N. Yessir and to be honest witcha, it did kinda explain a heck of a lot about just why he was so doggone loopy.
But still, Roland sure did like to tease McCawley for having the head creeps. He kept bringing it up, and McCawley kept gittin' upset and saying that heck now, it just ain't fair for Roland to be a-teasing him like that. Not when see, this little settlement of ours is s'posed to be all about not doing that kind of shit. See, that's s'posed to be right out.
McCawley now, he di'nt like that. Nosir. Whatcha s'pose he done - get a gun and kill McCawley? Bash his breads out with a tire-iron? Gun him down in his Cadillac - naw, course not. Because McCawley mighta been kinda like a rook in a pigeon's nest, sure, but he weren't a bad kinda guy. Just kinda... di'nt know when to hold his peace, when he oughta just held his piece instead haw haw haw!"
Or something.
Always used to get my goat, how he was always taking the mickey outta the McCawley kid. Now sure, the McCawley kid was a bit... strange, not bad now, just kinda... different. Anyway, he was always going on about this or that, and heck, to be straight with you we just di'nt know what he were talking about sometimes. But every once in a coon's age, he'd say something that'd make ya go 'Well shoot, now why di'nt I thinka that?!' and curse but he-he, he sure was a weird one.
Too weird, see, for this lad I used ta know. Now, this lad I knew - Roland was his name - was the son of a prosperous sugar trader. And sure, he knew things about things, and what about what, he was no slowpoke. But he sure did like to tease the McCawley kid. Why? Well, turns out one day that this McCawley kid got the uh, M - E - N - T - A - L - A- T- I - O - N. Yessir and to be honest witcha, it did kinda explain a heck of a lot about just why he was so doggone loopy.
But still, Roland sure did like to tease McCawley for having the head creeps. He kept bringing it up, and McCawley kept gittin' upset and saying that heck now, it just ain't fair for Roland to be a-teasing him like that. Not when see, this little settlement of ours is s'posed to be all about not doing that kind of shit. See, that's s'posed to be right out.
McCawley now, he di'nt like that. Nosir. Whatcha s'pose he done - get a gun and kill McCawley? Bash his breads out with a tire-iron? Gun him down in his Cadillac - naw, course not. Because McCawley mighta been kinda like a rook in a pigeon's nest, sure, but he weren't a bad kinda guy. Just kinda... di'nt know when to hold his peace, when he oughta just held his piece instead haw haw haw!"
Or something.
What?
Malc
ComicalGnomes wrote:
You have the head creeps, CUS.
Yes. See, even this tubby good-for-nothing* can work it out! Clue: What is the significance of the blue key?
*ComicalGnomes recently ran for a Leukemia-benefit charity, a concern close to my heart. He is, obviously to anyone, not good-for-nothing. he is however most tubby.
The blue key lets you get through blue doors on Doom 2, everyone knows that.
I'm also going on a diet, then you'll have nothing left to poke me with. Or rather, I'll have nothing for you to poke at, haha!
I'm also going on a diet, then you'll have nothing left to poke me with. Or rather, I'll have nothing for you to poke at, haha!
Anthony Flack wrote:
But the reason that CUS has been weirding me out a little is that in the times I've heard from him, I've been picking up such a potent mixture of hostility, sarcasm and/or possibly regular joking around that I find it really difficult to work out which is which. I'm not kidding. I'm not sure how to respond.
I've found it's best to assume that everything he says is a little of all 3.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
Friends only? I hate most of the people on here, and they hate me. I think.
Well you did repay the unflinching support of RevStu* when you were being threatened with legal action by reporting him to FACT^ on Bruce's blog.
* Calling you a coward for not taking a multi billion dollar organisation to court
^ Having the same initials in your nick as someone completely different who threatened to do so.
You monster!
I wish I knew how to be regular and tell regular jokes like non-specific persons who may or may inhabit this forum. Then I'd fit in, I just know it! Shucks.
I miss Titler. Can we get him back?
Mr. Chris, please do not cloud the issue by bringing up other people whom members of the moderation team have bullied off forums previously, I don't think that's relevant here.
Out of interest, has ['Cam' - Uncle Jo Stalin] registered yet?
Titler was a mahoosive cunt, though.
Yes, but still better than me. I "got it", it was very amusing, and I laughed with my mouth.
Is this better?
Is this better?
Er, no. Titler was a mahoosive cunt, you're not.
I do miss his obstreporously thick-headed argumentative style, though - I was put in mind of this today whilst arguing with an American.
I do miss his obstreporously thick-headed argumentative style, though - I was put in mind of this today whilst arguing with an American.
Yes, I agree with you. Americans, like the rest of the ex-colonial Anglosphere (e.g. Canada), really are the very worst of people, and their host nations really are the very worst countries. All of them.
I have nothing against the Americans as individuals. I had a lovely American girlfriend for a while, who had some of the most lovely parents I've ever met. And a particularly entertaining grandmother based in Virginia.
However, American lawyers do, as a rule, have a habit of being particularly annoying, even for lawyers. It was such an American with whom I was "enjoying" some badinage today.
However, American lawyers do, as a rule, have a habit of being particularly annoying, even for lawyers. It was such an American with whom I was "enjoying" some badinage today.
I imagine it must be hard trying to get all that work done, when your colleague is continually slipping into dreams and fantasies. And also probably passing out continually from malnutrition, as I recall.
I honestly have no idea what you're on about. Could you help me out and fill in the blanks? I appreciate this may kill the joke I didn't get, mind.
Ally McBeal, one of the most successful shows of the 90s (and indeed all time), starring Thinny McSkinny as the titular* lawyer, one of the most recognisable characters of the last two decades, the success of which has essentially led Thinny to an early retirement/marriage to Harrison Ford. Parodied widely, such as in a popular Futurama episode about 'Single Female Lawyer'.
It was shown over here Channel 4. I am unsure of More4/E4 has ever shown it, or if it has been repeated. DVD (and y'know... VHS) box-sets are available to buy/rent now.
I never said it was GOOD joke, I just thought it one of my more obvious ones. Jesus.
* Except, y'know, obviously... not.
It was shown over here Channel 4. I am unsure of More4/E4 has ever shown it, or if it has been repeated. DVD (and y'know... VHS) box-sets are available to buy/rent now.
I never said it was GOOD joke, I just thought it one of my more obvious ones. Jesus.
* Except, y'know, obviously... not.
AAAAAH. I see.
Amazingly, or perhaps sadly, I rarely think of Ally MacBeal any more, despite being a big fan of it at the time. Yeah, yeah, I know.
I fancied Lucy Lui and the blonde one hard though.
Amazingly, or perhaps sadly, I rarely think of Ally MacBeal any more, despite being a big fan of it at the time. Yeah, yeah, I know.
I fancied Lucy Lui and the blonde one hard though.
Mr Chris wrote:
I fancied Lucy Lui
I forgot she was in it. Lucy Lui.
Liu? Lui?
eye heart ell ell
Mr Chris wrote:
Liu? Lui?
You know, you make me want to shout!
