Findus Fop wrote:
Stop raising my voice to the children. It never helps the situation and is really just an expression of how annoyed I'm feeling.
I tried and maintained this for a while over the past year or two and it's FUCKING HARD. I grew up with an extremely shouty parent, and try as I might it's often my default response to a situation. You're right, it doesn't help and in fact often escalates whatever the issue is (especially with my daughter).
I tell myself off about shouting and repeat the process every now and again and each time it gets easier to keep it up / find alternate methods of dealing with things. I'm hoping one day it'll just be second nature to be completely calm and rational. For my sake and the kid's.
It's a worthy goal
If you've tried and maintained it then it's possible, no matter how hard. Hope I can achieve similar success!
I just find it hard when the child is being violent to be anything other than angrily reprimanding, even though I know it doesn't help. I'm going to be one of those people who wombles around the house whispering "soft voices" to an empty room, by the end of January.