Whoa! You liked Royal Mail shoes before they were cool?
You > Mop.
Similar to your story (ish), when I grew up as a Dickensian urchin, my Ma’s then husband who I thought was my dad but wasn’t bought each of us four girl kids a pair of trainers off of the back of a lorry as a last minute Christmas gift as we had none.
I was 14 years old. The others were 12, 10 and 8.
He had no idea what size feet me and his three daughters had, so guessed. He guessed wrong. Despite being the eldest, I had the smallest feet, so was forced to endure the next year’s PE lessons wearing some My Little Pony trainers that were meant for the youngest.
I wasn’t just teased for it, I was actively beaten up with that as the initial excuse. Twice. I ended up having my head glued back with a chunk of my hair cut out the second time.