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Dante's Commute
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Author:  Cavey [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

MrC wrote:
Only signed back in to see what pic you posted Cavey....don't get it TBH, but that might be just me living out of the UK for ages, my sense of humour is tainted....


It's probably more to do with the fact it was a shit joke on my part mate (at my expense btw), I wouldn't worry about it. :)

Author:  MrC [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:04 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

DavPaz wrote:
If I was being picky, and I am, I would point out that said picture is of a Balrog and not a Cave Troll. But the point still stands. ;)


Picky is good, I'm picky, but Mr Stupid (that's me) is still none the wiser.

Author:  Cavey [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:07 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

DavPaz wrote:
If I was being picky, and I am, I would point out that said picture is of a Balrog and not a Cave Troll. But the point still stands. ;)


Very true, on both counts I'd have to say. ;)

Author:  MrC [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:10 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Captain Caveman wrote:
MrC wrote:
Only signed back in to see what pic you posted Cavey....don't get it TBH, but that might be just me living out of the UK for ages, my sense of humour is tainted....


It's probably more to do with the fact it was a shit joke on my part mate (at my expense btw), I wouldn't worry about it. :)


I love shit jokes, just didn't get that one....no matter, and I don't worry about anything on here, as you're all clearly lovely (most of the time)

Author:  MaliA [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:11 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Captain Caveman wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
If I was being picky, and I am, I would point out that said picture is of a Balrog and not a Cave Troll. But the point still stands. ;)


Very true, on both counts I'd have to say. ;)


If I were being pickier still, I'd like to point out that it's really strange that cave trolls are "taller than the hill trolls". This makes no sense. It'd be a lot more advantageous to be smaller in a cave and taller in a forest. Normally, troglodyte creatures are smaller than their outdoors counterparts, aren't they?

Author:  Slightly Green [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

MaliA wrote:
Captain Caveman wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
If I was being picky, and I am, I would point out that said picture is of a Balrog and not a Cave Troll. But the point still stands. ;)


Very true, on both counts I'd have to say. ;)


If I were being pickier still, I'd like to point out that it's really strange that cave trolls are "taller than the hill trolls". This makes no sense. It'd be a lot more advantageous to be smaller in a cave and taller in a forest. Normally, troglodyte creatures are smaller than their outdoors counterparts, aren't they?


Well the Welsh are generally taller than English so I am not sure if that holds up...

Since I am Welsh I feel I can get away with the above sweeping statement, which obviously has zero scientific foundation.

Author:  Cavey [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 10:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

MaliA wrote:
Normally, troglodyte creatures are smaller than their outdoors counterparts, aren't they?


Yes, yes they are, vertically at least. :D

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Oct 04, 2012 11:54 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Image

More: http://wharferj.wordpress.com/2012/08/2 ... lla-signs/

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 15:57 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

The TFL boss has said that commuter trains are "shit".

http://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015 ... rains-shit

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 16:01 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Also, it took me four hours to get home last night, after some genius tried to cross a train track while a train was coming at Hendon.

Author:  Cras [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 16:19 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Doesn't hold back, does he?

Also, that's what you get for living in a field.

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 16:45 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

I totally reckon I could get to St. Pancras before you if we both left our houses at the same time.

Author:  Cras [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 16:48 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Ooh, dunno. 10 minute walk to the northern line then 40 minutes on the tube. And your train is nine hours.

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 16:55 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

10 minute drive then 40 minutes on the train.

The nine hour one is only at nights - so we'll do it at 4am and see who wins ;)

Author:  Cras [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 17:39 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

After July I'll have 24 hour tube!

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 17:41 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

We need to do the race before that, then :D

Author:  Cras [ Thu Apr 23, 2015 23:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Also, if it's 4am I'm just getting in a cab ;)

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 11:23 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

I have a new commute nemesis, but the most annoying thing is that he doesn't know he is.

Fat guy, gets on the train at the same stop as me, sits in the same carriage, spends all his time on his phone. All ok so far.
Gets off at my stop, walks through the train station, still glued to his phone the whole time, with no spatial awareness. The usual randomly speeding up, slowing down and meandering that all phone walkers do.
Waits for the same tube as me, in front of the carriage doors that I get on. Hasn't once looked up from his phone yet.
Tube arrives, he is standing in front of the doors... and he decides to wait for the next tube if it is slightly busy... but doesn't get out of the way, blocking the people behind him from getting on, ands the platform is pretty crowded and he is a big guy, so you can't exactly walk around him.

He has done it to me twice now, so I know to avoid standing behind him, but I hate him. I hate how oblivious he is to everything and everybody around him.

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 11:28 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Also, why do people feel the need to rub their oyster card on the reader? I've never seen anyone rub their credit card when doing a contactless payment in a shop, what's so special about an oyster card reader that makes them do it?
If anything it seems to slow down the card being read, rather than speed it up, which is what I expect they think it does.

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 11:31 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Also also, just get out of the way in fucking general, nobody cares that you need to have a last kiss with your boyfriend before you go your separate ways, certainly not the 200 people trying to squeeze past on the platform.

Author:  Bamba [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 12:01 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

If someone is literally blocking the way I'd have zero qualms about physically pushing past them while 'muttering' "fuck sake" loud enough for them to hear. I can thoroughly recommend doing that instead of being quietly raging.

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 12:09 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

I'd be doing that a hundred times a day in London. It's just easier to quietly tut and seethe inside.

Author:  Findus Fop [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 13:11 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Trooper wrote:
I have a new commute nemesis, but the most annoying thing is that he doesn't know he is.

Fat guy, gets on the train at the same stop as me, sits in the same carriage, spends all his time on his phone. All ok so far.
Gets off at my stop, walks through the train station, still glued to his phone the whole time, with no spatial awareness. The usual randomly speeding up, slowing down and meandering that all phone walkers do.
Waits for the same tube as me, in front of the carriage doors that I get on. Hasn't once looked up from his phone yet.
Tube arrives, he is standing in front of the doors... and he decides to wait for the next tube if it is slightly busy... but doesn't get out of the way, blocking the people behind him from getting on, ands the platform is pretty crowded and he is a big guy, so you can't exactly walk around him.

He has done it to me twice now, so I know to avoid standing behind him, but I hate him. I hate how oblivious he is to everything and everybody around him.


This would make me seethe. Nothing makes me quite so angry as the ones who just have the eyes glued to their book/kindle/phone/iPad Fucking Pro while they're walking along. They're effectively saying "Fuck all of you, I'm walking this way, it's up to you to ensure I don't crash into you."

I've failed to acquire a true bete noire on my commute, nobody has been truly egregious on a regular basis (apart from the train companies, natch. But that's too predictable and tedious to go into, though it has been truly, spectacularly awful since the timetable change. All the strikes were a walk in the park compared to this.)

Author:  myp [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 14:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Aren't you lot grumpy.

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 14:53 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Less grumpy now i've vented.

Author:  Mr Dave [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 18:29 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Generally, I'm easy going. Aside from the guy who used to take the same bus as me on the way to school. But not a bath. Or a shower. Or a trip to the laundry shop. Ever.
Words cannot describe how vomit-inducingly awful it was when he got on the bus (And the time he sat infront of me he nearly got it all over his back. He robably still wouldn't have washed). Although you could tell he had before he came up to the top deck from smell alone and prepare accordingly. Once you knew.

Although on the commute back from Epsom there was a crazy old guy would would mutter under his breath how much he wanted to kill me. For the sin of being next to the door that dropped you closest to the station exit.

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 18:31 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

In other commuting news, my train home has 12 carriages, the first stop is half an hour into the journey.

People are always crowded into the vestibules, standing up in the last half of the train, with the rest of the seats all taken.

I'm currently sitting in a six seat section, all on my lonesome, because I walked down to the front of the train and got on the second carriage. Same thing happens every day.
I'm not complaining about my oodles of space, I just find it weird.

Author:  Cras [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 18:42 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

It's the fear of the doors closing without them getting on that makes that happen, I think.

People who try and avoid that by walking down the inside of the train though *shudder*

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 18:57 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

I get to the train about 18:05 and the closest carriages are already full to bursting. The train leaves at 18:13...

Author:  Cras [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 19:00 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

People are idiots, I guess?

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Jul 17, 2018 19:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

I assumed it was idleness, not wanting to walk all the way down the platform, but surely if you are that idle you want to be sitting down for the journey?

Maybe they have never been this far down and think it is packed in every carriage, that would make sense!

Author:  Bamba [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 10:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

On my train in the parts where there are three-seater bits people will tend to sit with a gap between them. Which is fine and understandable when the train isn't full, but after that point it's wasted seat. The weird thing is though that other people will then almost never dare to sit in these spare seats. It's incredibly rare that I need to stand during my commute because even at a point when the doorway and aisles are full of fucking idiots standing up there's usually loads of these spare seats; and I've got no qualms about pushing in between two fannies and sitting in one of them. I find it deeply odd: there's a spare seat, why stand instead of sitting in it? People are fucking weird.

Author:  DavPaz [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 11:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

If no-one else does it... maybe you're the weird one

Author:  Bamba [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 11:06 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

DavPaz wrote:
If no-one else does it... maybe you're the weird one


Statistically it seems I am. Behaviourally though I'd argue they are.

Author:  Kern [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 11:09 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

If all the two-person seats in a carriage have one spare seat each, I will pick the one with a bag on it.

Author:  Findus Fop [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 11:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Kern wrote:
If all the two-person seats in a carriage have one spare seat each, I will pick the one with a bag on it.


100% :this:

Or if they're sitting in the aisle with a spare window seat.

Though I was thinking about Trooper's unaware nemesis on this morning's commute. What if I am unwittingly someone's hated nemesis? What have I been doing wrong? I found myself getting weirdly wound up about this hypothetical antagonist.

Author:  Curiosity [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 12:33 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Trooper wrote:
In other commuting news, my train home has 12 carriages, the first stop is half an hour into the journey.

People are always crowded into the vestibules, standing up in the last half of the train, with the rest of the seats all taken.

I'm currently sitting in a six seat section, all on my lonesome, because I walked down to the front of the train and got on the second carriage. Same thing happens every day.
I'm not complaining about my oodles of space, I just find it weird.


Or people want to stand next to the door that lets them off by their relevant station exit.

I generally go and stand in the carriage that will drop me off exactly at the right point to swiftly swan off out of the station.

That said, I don’t think any of the carriages on my train are at all empty.

Author:  Trooper [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 12:42 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Curiosity wrote:
Trooper wrote:
In other commuting news, my train home has 12 carriages, the first stop is half an hour into the journey.

People are always crowded into the vestibules, standing up in the last half of the train, with the rest of the seats all taken.

I'm currently sitting in a six seat section, all on my lonesome, because I walked down to the front of the train and got on the second carriage. Same thing happens every day.
I'm not complaining about my oodles of space, I just find it weird.


Or people want to stand next to the door that lets them off by their relevant station exit.

I generally go and stand in the carriage that will drop me off exactly at the right point to swiftly swan off out of the station.

That said, I don’t think any of the carriages on my train are at all empty.


Good point, but it's a 30 minute journey, would you stand for half an hour, just to get out the station 30 seconds faster?

Author:  JBR [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 13:37 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Last time I came back to the UK after a long break, I sat in one of those middle seats on the One/Anglia service out to Hertfordshire. Bloke next to me wasn't happy, he spent the next 15 minutes with his elbow in my side. He wasn't especially big, but perhaps felt the middle was his. I was too culture-shocked to say or do anything - nothing remotely comparable had happened to me anywhere else. After Heathrow tube station and blank-faced people in everyone's way as we tried to get in, it was quite the come-down welcome back.

I had a minor win, mind. At one point I glanced at him and he immediately piped up with a leer, and "alright?" I smiled at him and said "yeah, just fine, thanks".

But still, those 3-seats are just on the thin side of big enough to actually seat 3.

Author:  Malc [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:21 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Findus Fop wrote:
Kern wrote:
If all the two-person seats in a carriage have one spare seat each, I will pick the one with a bag on it.


100% :this:

Or if they're sitting in the aisle with a spare window seat.

Though I was thinking about Trooper's unaware nemesis on this morning's commute. What if I am unwittingly someone's hated nemesis? What have I been doing wrong? I found myself getting weirdly wound up about this hypothetical antagonist.


I nearly always sit in the aisle seat with the space by the window, I put my bag on that seat (cleaner than the floor) so if I fall asleep, it's harder for someone to try and steal it or get anything from it. It's also easier to get something out of the bag if I need to.

If the bus/train is busy I'll move the bag to between my feet, and if someone needs to sit next to me, they can have the window seat and I'll keep the aisle seat.

Much rather that, than be hemmed in by them. I also try and sit on the right side, so I can stretch my left leg into the aisle if I need to, as that knee often gets twitchy.

Author:  ApplePieOfDestiny [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:30 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Malc wrote:
Findus Fop wrote:
Kern wrote:
If all the two-person seats in a carriage have one spare seat each, I will pick the one with a bag on it.


100% :this:

Or if they're sitting in the aisle with a spare window seat.

Though I was thinking about Trooper's unaware nemesis on this morning's commute. What if I am unwittingly someone's hated nemesis? What have I been doing wrong? I found myself getting weirdly wound up about this hypothetical antagonist.


I nearly always sit in the aisle seat with the space by the window, I put my bag on that seat (cleaner than the floor) so if I fall asleep, it's harder for someone to try and steal it or get anything from it. It's also easier to get something out of the bag if I need to.

If the bus/train is busy I'll move the bag to between my feet, and if someone needs to sit next to me, they can have the window seat and I'll keep the aisle seat.

Much rather that, than be hemmed in by them. I also try and sit on the right side, so I can stretch my left leg into the aisle if I need to, as that knee often gets twitchy.

I bet you leave the house without makeup on because you can do it on the train and let everyone else suffer their commute in the misery of flailing arms and dust storms too.

Author:  Findus Fop [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:31 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Malc wrote:
Findus Fop wrote:
Kern wrote:
If all the two-person seats in a carriage have one spare seat each, I will pick the one with a bag on it.


100% :this:

Or if they're sitting in the aisle with a spare window seat.

Though I was thinking about Trooper's unaware nemesis on this morning's commute. What if I am unwittingly someone's hated nemesis? What have I been doing wrong? I found myself getting weirdly wound up about this hypothetical antagonist.


I nearly always sit in the aisle seat with the space by the window, I put my bag on that seat (cleaner than the floor) so if I fall asleep, it's harder for someone to try and steal it or get anything from it. It's also easier to get something out of the bag if I need to.

If the bus/train is busy I'll move the bag to between my feet, and if someone needs to sit next to me, they can have the window seat and I'll keep the aisle seat.

Much rather that, than be hemmed in by them. I also try and sit on the right side, so I can stretch my left leg into the aisle if I need to, as that knee often gets twitchy.


First against the wall.

Author:  Cras [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:32 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Malc, you're a terrible human being.

Author:  Zardoz [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Managed to grab a forward facing window seat in my car this morning.

Had my bag next to me on another window seat.

Author:  Squirt [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Zardoz wrote:
Managed to grab a forward facing window seat in my car this morning.

Had my bag next to me on another window seat.

Same here! AND I was playing music without my headphones in!

Author:  Doctor Glyndwr [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:44 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

All of these things might be fine and dandy in the provinces, but on a rush hour Tube train they'll get you lynched. And you couldn't assemble a jury inside the M25 that would convict the killers.

Author:  Zardoz [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:55 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Don't you Sarferners prebook your train tables anyway?

Author:  Grim... [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 14:57 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Yeah, you can.

Author:  Cras [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 15:06 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Grim... wrote:
Yeah, you can.


On a commuter train?!

Author:  Grim... [ Wed Jul 18, 2018 15:10 ]
Post subject:  Re: Dante's Commute

Tell me the fuck about it.

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