Grim... wrote:
Attachment:
Screenshot 2018-01-04 14.18.32.png
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| 1st world problems https://www.beexcellenttoeachother.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=8629 |
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| Author: | KovacsC [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:07 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I have tons of emails... had to dig my suit out. |
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| Author: | Findus Fop [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:09 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
KovacsC wrote: I have tons of emails... had to dig my suit out. You have a special suit for reading emails? |
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| Author: | Bamba [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:10 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Findus Fop wrote: KovacsC wrote: I have tons of emails... had to dig my suit out. You have a special suit for reading emails? You don't? |
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| Author: | Findus Fop [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:13 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Bamba wrote: Findus Fop wrote: KovacsC wrote: I have tons of emails... had to dig my suit out. You have a special suit for reading emails? You don't? This is clearly something I need to rectify. |
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| Author: | Zardoz [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:15 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I was in last Thursday so I vaguely remember what to do. |
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| Author: | DavPaz [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:30 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I remember what to do, but there's no fucker else here for me to do it to. |
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| Author: | Cras [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 11:34 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
...title? |
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| Author: | KovacsC [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 12:32 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Two of my staff have not renewed their contracts, so 2 staff down. I hope i get his job on Friday |
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| Author: | Warhead [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 15:31 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I know what I do, but no one's asked me to do it today, and I can't do it unless someone asks me. I know that this is because there was no one in the office yesterday to accept requests for me to do any things today, so I'm doing other things instead, like finally getting around to weeding my mailbox and some of them useless on-line courses that they want us all to do, but that we're usually too busy doing our proper tasks to be able to find time to do them. That sentence got a bit messy towards the end, but I can't be bovvered to apply the 5 Cs to it. |
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| Author: | Zardoz [ Tue Jan 02, 2018 16:31 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
C C C C C There you go mate. Happy New Year. |
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| Author: | Warhead [ Wed Jan 03, 2018 11:54 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Thanks. The year's off to a good start. |
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| Author: | TheVision [ Wed Jan 03, 2018 12:09 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
My phone has started acting weird when it's on WiFi. It's almost like it's being throttled somewhere as it takes ages to connect to Web pages and download images on Twitter. I've reset my router a couple of times and turned my phone off and on too. It's really quite annoying as the 4G signal in my house is pretty patchy too. |
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| Author: | Warhead [ Wed Jan 03, 2018 12:16 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
TheVision wrote: My phone has started acting weird when it's on WiFi. It's almost like it's being throttled somewhere as it takes ages to connect to Web pages and download images on Twitter. I've reset my router a couple of times and turned my phone off and on too. It's really quite annoying as the 4G signal in my house is pretty patchy too. It's the Russians. They started faffing around with my TiVo a couple of days ago. We were watching McMafia on the Beeb and suddenly it swapped to a Netflix splash page and I when I tried to swap back to channel 101 it just swapped back again, and again, and again. I could only fix it by doing a hard reset. |
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| Author: | Jem [ Wed Jan 03, 2018 15:37 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I worked on and off over Christmas but the kids were back today and so a 2hr meeting this AM really kicked things off. Got to make 2018 my best year yet. |
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| Author: | Sir Taxalot [ Wed Jan 03, 2018 22:08 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I ate a load of seafood and got sick so had to miss a day of work, I still got paid though, and didn't die, so I guess that is first-worldy. |
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| Author: | Warhead [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 10:15 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Sir Taxalot wrote: I ate a load of seafood containing a lot of ingested plastic waste and got sick so had to miss a day of work, I still got paid though, and didn't die, so I guess that is first-worldy. FTFY. |
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| Author: | MaliA [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:31 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Do you have to wear a black suit to a funeral? It's my next door neighbour's tomorrow (cremation, and double check that apostrophe placement) and although I think my attire is the least of her concerns, could I get away with dark clothes and a jumper? |
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| Author: | KovacsC [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:33 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I don't always. I wear a black tie and blue suit, or black suit and coloured tie. |
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| Author: | Kern [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:34 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
A suit's the easiest way to look suitably dark and sombre. |
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| Author: | Squirt [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:37 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I was once at a funeral where some idiot in-law rocked up in a black top with "FCUK" across the front in rhinestones. Don't wear something like that, it *really* doesn't go down well. |
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| Author: | Kern [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:38 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
It's like a wedding: you don't want to wear anything that draws attention away from the day's stars. |
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| Author: | TheVision [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:38 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I think you'd get away with dark clothes. I'm sure you're not going to look inappropriate so I wouldn't worry too much. |
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| Author: | MaliA [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:39 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Squirt wrote: I was once at a funeral where some idiot in-law rocked up in a black top with "FCUK" across the front in rhinestones. Don't wear something like that, it *really* doesn't go down well. It's very late nineties. |
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| Author: | Mimi [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 14:55 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
As long as you wear dark and smart clothes you won’t raise any eyebrows from the older generation. I doubt you’d choose anything inappropriate. If you’re at all uncertain though, and have a dark or black suit to hand, go with that to avoid self-doubt. |
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| Author: | Kern [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 15:00 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Entrance music is a no-no. |
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| Author: | Mimi [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 15:12 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Don’t glide in on a pair of adult heelies, either. |
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| Author: | Grim... [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 15:19 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Attachment: Screenshot 2018-01-04 14.18.32.png
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| Author: | Findus Fop [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 15:20 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
MaliA wrote: Do you have to wear a black suit to a funeral? It's my next door neighbour's tomorrow (cremation, and double check that apostrophe placement) and although I think my attire is the least of her concerns, could I get away with dark clothes and a jumper? Dark red shirt. |
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| Author: | KovacsC [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 15:41 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Grim... wrote: Attachment: Screenshot 2018-01-04 14.18.32.png
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| Author: | GazChap [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 16:26 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
I'll let Jem tell the story about her brother's funeral and the behaviour and dress code that was apparently acceptable. |
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| Author: | Bamba [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 21:40 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
GazChap wrote: I'll let Jem tell the story about her brother's funeral and the behaviour and dress code that was apparently acceptable. Turning up in your Pacman suit was probably a bad idea to be fair... |
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| Author: | Jem [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 21:53 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
GazChap wrote: I'll let Jem tell the story about her brother's funeral and the behaviour and dress code that was apparently acceptable. Oh god, I'm not sure they'd believe us... |
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| Author: | Bamba [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 21:54 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Jem wrote: GazChap wrote: I'll let Jem tell the story about her brother's funeral and the behaviour and dress code that was apparently acceptable. Oh god, I'm not sure they'd believe us... Enough with the teasing, spill it! |
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| Author: | Jem [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 21:54 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Just about to eat but I'll write it up after! |
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| Author: | Jem [ Thu Jan 04, 2018 23:18 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
As a precursor it's worth mentioning that I'd not seen my brother in about 9-10 years for a variety of reasons, so I was expecting to see a lot of unfamiliar faces. However, I was not prepared for the shit show that it was... Gaz is driving to the crem with me, one of my younger brothers & his girlfriend. We are driving up a busy A road, when we come up on a woman walking up the road in ridiculously high stilettos and a bright red coat. We find it odd, but think nothing of it. Pull into the crem, get out and notice that there are people DANCING in amongst the graves in the crem grounds. Anyway, so we're standing outside waiting for the coffin to arrive, hoping to god that the dancers are not with "us". There's a meowing noise but we can't see a cat. Odd. Suddenly massive stiletto woman walks in, followed shortly after by the car+coffin. Stiletto woman is shaking - and I don't mean shaking with cold or from walking, I mean full on DTs. We organise people carrying the coffin, some flowers are placed on it, we walk into the crem to the delightful sound of Eminem swearing at us. The grave dancers follow in behind, one of whom was wearing an outfit bordering on the obscene for a night out let alone a funeral (and if you follow me on instagram you know that's not something I say lightly) a black lacy number with a choker and ...interesting make-up and hair. We take our seats. The service begins. There's some mumbling and fidgeting at the back but nothing terrible. About 3/4 of the way through the service, the meowing sound comes back. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow. We start looking around - where the fuck is this sound coming from? Meow meow meow. Someone answers their telephone. Someone answers their fucking cat fucking ringtone telephone in the middle of my brother's funeral service. Doesn't even cut it off, doesn't apologise profusely and turn it off. No, they answer and say "nah mate, nah, I'm busy, can you call me back?" Hangs up. The lady doing the service continues. No more than 30 seconds later the phone rings again. Meow meow meow. Meow meow meow. I honestly can't even remember what happened next, I was literally ready to kill. He must have turned the phone off at this point. The lady doing the service gives an incredibly stern warning about turning phones onto silent. The service continues. We're not far from the end at this point, but still obviously in progress, when obscene clothing choker lady gets up, walks to the front row where we're sat and with no emotion, no empathy, nothing - just like a robot - drawls "sorry for your loss" then goes and sits down again. The service ends, we walk out to more delightful tunes from Eminem. Do the "thanks for coming" etc etc bit outside. My dead brother's ex girlfriend's sister spent 15 minutes wailing into my shoulder telling me [he] was the love of her life. I don't remember what happened to the lady with the DTs, and the grave dancers leave. The funeral director at this point comes over and has a word - turns out the flowers placed on the coffin had been stolen from a grave by one of the grave dancers. (Also had apparently arrived an hour early and one of them had demanded hot chocolates from the crem "because I'm diabetic") I have never been to a funeral this bizarre in my life, and honestly don't think any other will top it. |
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| Author: | Grim... [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 0:11 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Wait, the sister of his girlfriend was saying he was the love of her life? |
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| Author: | KovacsC [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 1:31 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Grim... wrote: Wait, the sister of his girlfriend was saying he was the love of her life? That is the odd bit you pick out... |
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| Author: | Sir Taxalot [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 2:50 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Sounds like more fun than some weddings I've been to, TBH |
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| Author: | Jem [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 8:58 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Grim... wrote: Wait, the sister of his girlfriend was saying he was the love of her life? Ex girlfriend, but yeah. I have no idea what had been going on between them 
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| Author: | Trousers [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 11:00 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Jem wrote: However, I was not prepared for the shit show that it was... Attachment: funerasl.jpg
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| Author: | Zardoz [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 11:09 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Jem wrote: ...I have never been to a funeral this bizarre in my life, and honestly don't think any other will top it. Yeah... that's every kind of fucked up. |
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| Author: | MrChris [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 13:50 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Just dropped a bottle of wine :-/ Hate wasting both alcohol and money |
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| Author: | DBSnappa [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 15:11 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Just bought a Kenwood Multipro Excel with most of the accessories. There are so many of them I'm facing the prospect of having to reorganise quite a few of the cupboards in the kitchen to store them all. The bloody disc/slicer store it comes with is the size of a small bread bin on it's own! There are two mixing/blending bowls of different sizes, a 2l blender jug in glass, a nut/seed/spice grinder, a citrus press, a weighing tray. Then there are the various mixing attachments that don't fit in the blade store, such as the double whisk and folding tool. There are more things I've not mentioned. The machine itself is much larger than it looks in pictures as well, being approximately 10" sq and 6-7" tall. Everything was packaged very well in a box roughly the same size as a medium sized dog kennel. I now have enough cardboard to make a 1:5 scale replica of a star destroyer. |
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| Author: | MrChris [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 15:13 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
DBSnappa wrote: J nut/seed/spice grinder Title Quote: folding tool. title Quote: much larger than it looks in pictures Title Quote: Everything was packaged very well in a box roughly the same size as a medium sized dog kennel. title |
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| Author: | markg [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 15:26 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Why does nobody in this fucking office understand or believe me when I tell them what a thermostat is for. The building is always cold on a Monday so they turn the fucking things up to full thinking it'll make the radiators hotter or something. Then start opening windows by the afternoon because it's too hot. |
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| Author: | Zardoz [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 16:02 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
Male menopause. |
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| Author: | asfish [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 18:32 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
The washing machine has stopped working, showing error F21 Needs new motor brushes. Things started off well, I posted on a local private FB group and found a local guy who was around in 15 mins. Then the fun started, it turns out the guy we bought our house from couldn't be arsed to run flooring in the kitchen to the walls, he just stopped past the units, so the front feet of the washing machine have gone under the flooring (I guess from years of spin cycle movement) and we can't get it out! Repair guy is coming around with more tools tomorrow, I just spent 40 mins drilling holes in the floor and chiselling out around the front feet so hopefully, we can sort things out tomorrow. |
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| Author: | LewieP [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 19:46 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
A family of wild island buffalo were blocking the bit of beach I was walking home from the bar along. They were big and clearly did not want to be fucked with. |
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| Author: | DavPaz [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 21:22 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
LewieP wrote: A family of wild island buffalo were blocking the bit of beach I was walking home from the bar along. They were big and clearly did not want to be fucked with. 2nd world problems! |
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| Author: | MaliA [ Fri Jan 05, 2018 21:27 ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 1st world problems |
asfish wrote: Repair guy is coming around with more tools tomorrow, I just spent 40 mins drilling holes in the floor and chiselling out around the front feet so hopefully, we can sort things out tomorrow. Put wooden dowel under the front of the machine, hacksaw blade to cut off front legs, lean machine forwards to lift rear legs up, roll out on to dolly trolley, junk it, replace with new washing machine. |
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