Be Excellent To Each Other

I haven't been arrested personally, but my dad once was for taking a picture of a steam engine in a security-paranoid foreign country, who assumed he was taking a picture of the train for explosion-military purposes. It was a good 20 years ago though.

I once had an ex-gf arrested because she went all dodgy and stalkerish, wouldn't stop calling, wouldn't fuck off. The day she came around to my flat and started battering the windows and ringing the doorbell incessantly I rang 999. I had a very amusing sight from my window seeing 4 or 5 police officers running towards my flat, who promptly arrested her, cuffed her, and took her off to the nick for a few hours. She was let off with a caution. hoho!

Not me. Nearly have a couple of times in my youth, for petty little things, but... nope. In fact, I can't think of anyone in my (extended) family who has. I'm suddenly a bit proud.

I had a stand-off with armed police when I was eighteen over a misunderstanding.
The stand off lasted approximately 0.001 picoseconds, at which point I dived on the floor with my hands behind my head.
Momma Grim... din raise no fewal.

Commuter-FTFY.

I was in Bedfordshire at the time, standing outside one of the largest gun-storage locations in the county. Who can put two and two together for me?

You're sleepy?

Nah, Bashful.

I've not been arrested, but like Comical I've had someone else arrested. The story is here.

Awesome story of awesomeness. What happened to Baldie?

See now, I honestly was going to make the joke that 'Hahaha - sounds a bit like someone We know!', in regards to going off with a screaming flid over an arguable matter of little importance. Then I got to the bottom and read 'what happened next', and frankly, words fail me.

/shakes head

I glued the locks of a Transit that had parked in front of my garage.

The story is funnier if you replace all references of "Baldie" with "Flat Top". Don't ask me why.

Good thing I remembered to install a 'flattop' filter whilst I was still a mod, eh? Ho ho ho!

Also: as I mentioned above, once I reached mention of superglue, my 'Hahaha!' post crumbled away. GazChap, if I hadn't met you, I would right now be accusing you of being a secret Bathite.

She came back again about two months later and lived in the same house as before. I think she lasted about two days before they had to cart her off to the loony bin again. Don't know what prompted it that time, but she sure wasn't there for long.

I still want to know what happened to Baldy.

Could baldie be bald because of Chemo?

I'm glad you've said that. This whole time I've been imagining that GazChap used to live next to the bastard offspring of Mo Mowlam and RevStu. StuMo. MoStu.

I read a fab story about Mo Mowlam. Apparently she was going to give a talk and some students were setting up a hall with chairs. In pottered a lady on her own who then starts helping. The students thanked her and she exited.

It was only when the talk began that they realised it was Mo Mowlam who had just spent 15 minutes helping them put the chairs out.

I have never been arrested or anything like that.

However, I have been joy riding. I just was too stupid to realise that I was at the time.

Seems that she maybe had a point...

Not been arrested, but I have been read my rights.

I managed to throw my car into a ditch one afternoon (nobody hurt fortunately) and later on the police came round to caution me for dangerous driving.

Apparently it's something they do with every accident that happens, but then recommend on their paperwork that the offence isn't taken any further because nobody else is involved.

Does that mean that you actually have anything on official record saying that you were read your rights by the police, though, or is it not made a permanent record of? Also, how do they know that you were driving dangerously and that, I don't know, there was a patch of oil on the road, or something?

Sorry, I do not drive so these things are a mystery to me.

I've been stopped by the police 3 times. But never arrested. I perhaps should have been for the last one...

Time number 1) Carrying a monitor out of the block of flats where I lived. I was about 21 at the time, still living with my parents (my dad was a policeman, and the flats were police flats, I'd lived there since I was about 8 months old). I had taken a monitor home from work, and was returning it. (I worked about 10 minutes walk away) A resident (a policeman) thought I was a theif, so stopped me, and then waited for uniform to turn up. I explained the situation, they checked it out (phoned my home, my work, and the police station where my dad worked) and told me not to do it again! WTF?

Time number 2) was in the passenger seat of a van, with a work colleague driving (he was a narcoleptic [sp?] it was the scariest ride I've ever been on, and fell asleep at the wheel 3 times! But that's not why were we stopped) when we were pulled over, as apparently we matched the description of some armed robbers. It quite quickly became apparent that we weren't

Time number 3) Had been drinking after work, and decided to cycle back (only a 10min walk, about 3 minutes by bike) Police car stopped me for not having any lights on, and realised I had been drinking straight away. I played the policemans son routine, they asked me if my dad would be proud of me for what I was doing, I said no, and they let me go "telling me not to do it again"

Malc

Quite possibly. I would imagine that finding out you have cancer and X months to live would send some people round the bend.

I believe they will have something on record, but it will only appear as a footnote or something. I definitely had to sign a statement to say I understood them though, so that'll be in a box somewhere no doubt.

With regards to the dangerous driving thing; many accidents are apparently regarded as dangerous driving, as in the eyes of the law it must be down to driver error (unless it's a tree falling on you or something I guess).

In my case I hit mud on the road going round a corner, but still had to be read my rights. This is why the policeman said they recommend that the case is taken no further, as it's clearly not actual dangerous driving. To rub salt into the wound, someone put up a hand-painted warning sign the next day on that stretch of road saying MUD ON ROAD.

Thanks Mr Russ, that's handy to know. I don't know why because I don't drive, other than it has now made me want to drive even less I wish the country had some kind of conveyor belts running up and down it instead of motorways, so you could just take a chair along and plonk it on the conveyor belt and travel that way

Motorways are actually excellent to drive on.

I live in Lincolnshire where it's all rural, windy roads. I would say 90% of accidents are from people overtaking slower moving traffic on such roads.

They're easy and fast, aye, but bloody boring. I did 250 motorway-miles last weekend, and I'm all motorwayed out for a long time now. Doesn't help if you're on a bike, as all you've got for entertainment is your own singing, and the wind.

Oh yes, a good music selection is a must.

Same here, once for speeding, once for blatantly going through a red light, and once for overtaking on a solid white line. In each case *they let me off*. I genuinely don't understand it - I was like "it's a fair cop, here's my license" etc and they were just interesting in telling me off. Got breathalised on the red light one but that's it.

Before all this I did get stopped on my mountain bike in Aberdeen while at uni. I'd just been to the cash machine so had my bike up on the pavement. I kind of walked astride it back to the road (this was on the corner at a crossroads with lights), while putting my wallet back in my pocket. My direction was clear so I bumped back on to the road and carried on at normal high rate of knots. After about 3 blocks a police transit with about 12 coppers in it slams up on the pavement ahead of me and the WPC driver and a friend jump out and basically corner me. The WPC claimed that I'd been riding on the pavement, gone though a red light across a pedestrian crossing, failed to stop when signalled by a police officer and this was best bit, that I'd then "made an obscene gesture" at the cop van and her personally (which I hadn't even seen).
I was so outraged / terrified by these lies that I didn't have an explanation at all other than sort of winding up to spit all kinds of fury, at which point I was told that they weren't busy and were quite happy to throw me in the cells for the hell of it.

After intimidating me a bit more they too let me go and told me to not to do it again, and it was only later I realised what the obscene gesture had been: I had indicated to turn right just after getting back to the road. You know, sticking your arm out and looking over your shoulder? Apparently they'd never seen or heard of anyone doing that before.

I got arrested in my home town once. The police tried to track me down and bring me in guilty for the killing of a deputy.

I kept trying to plant some seeds, see, but Sheriff John Brown always said "Kill them before they grow", and he got really threatening about it after a while, so I shot him down. It was a clear case of self defence, and I didn't shoot the deputy anyway, but they still say it's a capital offence. Bastards.

Did Stu actually do that, then?

I'm starting to think so certainly.

Although you'd think that given all the pratice he'd be better at erasing the evidence really.

He was arrested and then released for it. He certainly denies doing it.

Malc

He was hardly likely to admit it in writing, though.

Dunno, I'm not subbed...

I think the last time someone asked, I pointed out that denying it to a forum who generally assume he's always honest would be a good bit of plausable deniability to reference, if necessary, in future.

If he didn't though, who did? It'd have to be a very random, freak attack.

I thought the implication was that the people he'd griped at for blocking him in had done it themselves to stitch him up?
Which did sort of sound plausible at the time.

Or it could've been Baldy.

You'd have to be particularly special to glue your own locks in the hopes of stiching up someone else.

Stranger things happen on Columbo.

I was watching that yesterday. There was a bonus episode on the DVD featuring Captain Janeway as Mrs Columbo. I know!

I own columbo seasons 1-7, you don't need to tell me. Yes, the couple of Mrs Columbo eps are a bit bizarre. It's probably for the best it was cancelled.

Man, not as bizarre as the Patrick McGoohan directed ones. I thought I was on drugs.

Last night I watched the ep where the guy was killed with fish poison in the wine-bottle opener, and then the murderer tries to kill columbo the same way. If I was columbo, I'd be a bit miffed that the guy had tried to kill me.

Actually that was right after the ep someone else tried to kill him by using the dogs trained to kill whenever anyone said 'Rosebud'. People seem to try and kill columbo a lot. He takes it very well.

What I can't forgive however is that bitch that tried to kill columbo's wife with the marmalade. Fucking hell, his WIFE! Well harsh.

I was almost arrested in Iowa, on the outskirts of Mason City.

It was the night before my mate's wedding, and we went out and got trolleyfucked. Then got someone to drive us to the gravel pit and we went skinny dipping. At 2am. The police turned up but we talked our way out of a night in the cells with the help of the Xtian Fundie that had driven us there and by dint of being English. Apparently the park shuts at 11pm and skinny dipping is a no no.