His knowing that I'm not (and never have been) called Matthew is quite the trick - there are only thirty or so 'proper' Matt's in the UK, and so would have been the 'wrong' conclusion for him to come to in 99.9% of circumstances.

His knowing that I'm not (and never have been) called Matthew is quite the trick - there are only thirty or so 'proper' Matt's in the UK, and so would have been the 'wrong' conclusion for him to come to in 99.9% of circumstances.

His knowing that I'm not (and never have been) called Matthew is quite the trick - there are only thirty or so 'proper' Matt's in the UK, and so would have been the 'wrong' conclusion for him to come to in 99.9% of circumstances.

This has already been pointed out but what he said, "you've never been a Matthew" would probably have sounded right for 99.9% of Matthews.

I think Daniels has had a bum deal. A bit like Beadle, he was wildly popular and then just become unpopular because what he did was uncool in the eyes of an influential few rather than anything about him as a person. When you see him interviewed you can see the interviewer trying to take the piss a bit and he just doesn't fall for it*. Man at the top of his profession has a bit of an ego off stage. Well, like, duh.

His magic shows were brilliant and he is still a superb entertainer. I can't get to Youtube but the ball under the glass routine is so incredibly fast it takes the breath away.

*Best example is the infamous Mrs Merton bit "and why did you marry the millionaire Paul Daniels"? Fuck you Aherne, you smug cow. A bit rich for her to slag someone off for riding on the coattails of more talented performers.

Eh?

See also the Louis Theroux episode where he stayed with Paul Daniels and Debbie McGee for a week. The format set them up to look odd/stupid/unpleasant/whatever, but in fact they came out of it seeming like a really pleasant and thoroughly likable couple.

I never saw that episode. I do remember Theroux's episode with Jimmy Saville though - now, he WAS weird... I don't care about editing, suggestion and whatnot - Jimmy Saville is nuts-out-batty, however charitable and nice he may or may not be, there's something odd going on there.

Blount is a real name? The only Blount I know of is the main guy in Goblins 3.

My birth certificate was changed when I was about a year old and it has fucked my life up, fact fans.

How so, Meems? What happened?

There's not much difference, practically speaking, between a statutory declaration and a deed poll.

However, you cannot change details on your birth certificate, except in very limited circumstances. These generally revolve around your parents being idiots. For instance, it turns out that my niece ended up with her dad's surname as her forename, as my sister wrote the wrong bits in the wrong place. We discovered this when she was 14, and, of course, immediately started calling her "Blount" rather than "Kerry". Tee hee. So we explained everything to the Registry Office and they issued an amended birth certificate. But that's about the only way you can get your birth certificate changed.

This can result in fun for people who have had multiple name changes (e.g. imagine if you were born, named, adopted, married divorced!)

How so, Meems? What happened?

Was the book signed and dedicated to you?

Go on, someone say 'he's gay, you know'.


Actually, I think he's very attractive. But I think that's just because he WANTS me to think that.

I like that since 'outing' himself, he occasionally makes sly jokes about it in the shows.

I didn't know he was gay.

Now I'm not gay, but if I had too......

Ooh, good tip!

Avoid tapir urination.

Right, anything else I need to know? So far I have an annotated map of all booths the sell ice-cream and the precise location of where the man with hundreds of balloons is to be found, and, of course, the note about the tapir

I like tapirs, they look like first-draft elephants.