Be Excellent To Each Other

I can't believe he's been living with us for almost 6 months and we've only just found out he has a phobia of sponges. We're planning something big, like maybe tiling his bedroom door with the things. Any ideas?

sponge clown face?

Throw a sponge at him.


Wait, no, two!

Move.

I used to live with someone quite annoying who had a phobia balloons. I was never cruel enough to fill her room with balloons or anything, but the moment of the graduation ball where thousands of balloons were released from the ceiling onto the dance floor was quite something to behold

Make him a sandwich with a slice of yellow sponge along with lettuce and salad between two slices of bread.

Evil. Sod.

Haha
I've just thought maybe we could slide a large piece of sponge alongside his bed while he's asleep. Apparently it's the feel of sponge they can't stand, so I can't imagine they're big fans of standing on the stuff in their bare feet first thing in the morning.

Take away his mattress and put tons of sponges where it was (but still under the duvet) so he won't notice until he goes to get into bed. It would be so cool if there was one giant matress sizes sponge, but I doubt they do them that big.

A bucket of sponges propped above the door? a twist on an old classic.

Do you have a fear of left-handed people, Dimrill?

Only the sinister ones.

No no no! It's the feel and texture that's the problem. I'm fine with sponges, but not the foam in sofas. Get some of that, it's infinitely worse stuff. Then sit around slowly sinking your dry teeth into it and rubbing clothing on it. It's horrible. Thoughts like that keep me awake at night.

Some of that stuff you use for flower arranging would work well too.. oasis I think it's called. The green stuff you stick the flowers into. Chew on some of that.

Oh, I just wondered about the detail of 'left-handed' in the picture you posted.

It is oasis that you speak of - I quite like breaking bits of that off, actually. I don't like acrylic wool - the thought of it in my mouth makes me gag (for some reason I once chewed on the cuff of my school uniform cardigan when I was bout 6 and it made my teeth 'itch' and shudder, and the thought of it makes me feel horrible.

Also, the thought of orchids growing out of my face makes me feel ill.

You'd better hope you never get orchiditis then!

I modelled it on my left hand while I drew with my right one

I might just go the psychological route and fuck him up slowly. A sponge taped to the outside of his window so it makes him jump when he opens his curtains, that sort of thing.

Cut all the bristles off his toothbrush and replace them with that foam stuff. *shudder*

Post him a box with a sponge in it.

Place tiny bits of sponge in random CD / DVD cases.

In shoes.

Sellotape a whole wall of sponges completely blocking his doorway while he is sleeping.

Oh yeah I like that Dimrill. Small, localised foam attacks. A strip of foam behind a door handle

EDIT: Craig, sponge in shoes! Yes!

Super glue a Spongebob Squarepants video into his VHS machine. That'll learn him.

Make him a 'Sponge' cake 4 realz.

The only thing that gets to me is polystyrene, the squeak of pulling a new product out of packaging makes me cringe like hell. It's like the sound goes further in than my ears if that makes sense?!

I'm fine with sponge, chewing wool, cotton wool, chalk on blackboards, balloons and orchids growing out of my face. It's just polystyrene.

I knew someone once who had a phobia of apple stickers.

I don't like the sound of paper being torn much. Office paper, in particular. I wouldn't say it was a phobia exactly though.

I don't have any particular phobias, but I don't like the idea of being sodomised with a rake. I wouldn't call it a phobia, though.

stick some sponge in his ass when he's not noticing.

"Bravery beyond the call of duty" is what I'd call it.

Arf!
What I mean is, it puts my teeth on edge but I'm not actually afraid of sheets of A4.

Wow! Me neither. We should start a support group. "Anal-ised Anonymous"?

So you can chew tin foil?

i hate the stuff. horrible squeaking shit! i can't touch it, either.

Wouldn't bother me, no.

Freak.

No. YOU are.

Whether you can chew tin foil or not depends on if you have any fillings does it not? I've got a mouthful of metal, the very thought of chewing tin foil makes me spasm.

I have an intense phobia of moths and, to a much lesser extent, butterflies.

After years of trying to fight it I'm now okay with small moths and am able to move out of range of larger moths without screaming or crying while my wife deals with them, but if one flutters near my head unexpectedly I will probably actually scream and if it doesn't fly straight off I'll probably burst into tears and, if I'm not frozen solid with fear, break someone or something with my wildly flailing arms.

It's the weirdest feeling, with one part of your brain saying, "It's only a fucking moth!" and some other deeper, darker part that you don't normally notice just screaming in absolute terror.

There's nothing else like it in terms of sheer intensity of emotion, I don't think.

I was staying at my parents' house four or five years ago, so I was just about thirty, and was having a bath at one in the morning. Laying back, comfortable, calm... and then a moth started flying round my head. I woke the whole house with my screaming and scared the shit out of them. Was incredibly embarrassing, obviously.

And I'll just add that if someone has a genuine phobia or something rather than just a bit of fear or dislike then pranking them with the the thing their phobic of is about the worst thing you can do them. Which is fine if you hate them and want them to suffer, but if it's just for a laugh then, really, don't fucking do it.

Haha, don't worry about it, I'm sure he'll get me back. They put a tarantula on my face when I'd drunk myself unconscious once and I fucking hate spiders. If I'd have woken up I honestly think I would have run straight through the kitchen wall.

Mine's more of a "ARGH FUCK!" response with foam. Not a phobia as such, just can't stand touching it or seeing someone else touch it. Sends my teeth funny. It's not terror, certainly. The thought of someone with rough hands stroking the foam, bits of hard skin catching and scraping against it.... urgh *shudders*

i can't stand the, er... (translation website) tickle. if anyone does tickle me i have to stop them - i push and kick and i can't help it. SuperFunJordan (yup, Gordon and Jordan) knows not to do it :|

Gordon and Jordan?

Do you have a TV show yet?

"Gordan and Jordan's Gallic Fun Tickle Time" would be a winner.

a show all about a big man hitting a small woman?

I have a massive phobia of wasps and bees. This is in large part due to being allergic to them, and any sting is, whilst not yet fatal, a sever annoyance that will deform part of my body to an amusing degree (not amusing for me, but for onlookers, perhaps).

It did amuse me when I was camping in a particularly wasp-filled area, that I was continually running around and screaming like a girl (well, actually that bit just amused the onlookers). Several people told me that would just encourage the wasps to sting me, and that standing or sitting still would make them go away. Three of the advisors got stung... I did not! Hah! In your face, standing still in the face of wasps people!

I am also allergic to bees (I have been stung twice in the past. I pass out and wake up sometime later in hospital). I don't actually know if I am allergic to wasps or not as I have never been stung by one. I don't dislike bees though, much less have a phobia of them (maybe I have more of a phobia of being stung) but bees seem quite comical to me. I think I have told the story of my friend the bee - Comedy Bee - before, so I won't repeat it. Wasps I am not so fond of, but there seems to be a wasps nest somewhere near my flat as a wasp tries to get in through the window about once an hour, which is a pain at this time of year when you want the windows open.

I was once playing basketball on our back garden patio (I'd have been about 17). I was drinking cans of cider whilst doing so, on a lovely hot summer day. I got to the end of one can, glugged it back, but before swallowing noticed that it felt like there was something bouncing around my mouth. I thought about swallowing, but then thought it might be something gross, so I spat the moutful out into the sink.

It turned out that the little thing was a live wasp, which was crawling around and looking very angry.

Had I swallowed it, there's a fairly high chance it would have stung my throat on the way down, which would have been followed by a much higher chance of me then dying.

I also now have a phobia of cans (but only on sunny days).

you should make loofer (sp?) blair witch things like in the film but there made from twigs n that and hang them from his ceiling.

If I have a can of drink (as I do now) I know that I will not drink it all in one go, so usually I have it open for a few hours. I usually put a CD, blob of blu-tac or something like that over the can, because otherwise I wouldn't be able to drink from it again.

Doing anything to trigger someone's phobia deliberately makes you not excellent.

So far today I have consumed 5 cans of diet coke. Mostly out of boredom, it must be said, and because they're bogof at the moment.

He's my mate, not yours, and I'll reduce him to a gibbering wreck if I see fit.

I said "Gallic" not "phallic".

How do you ever get to sleep?