Be Excellent To Each Other

Or, if they call while you and Russell are both there, don't answer the door, but shout to each other something like this:

You: OUR IDIOT NEIGHBOURS ARE AT THE DOOR.

Russell: KEEP QUIET, THEY MAY JUST GO AWAY.

We did that with Jehovah's Witnesses a few years ago. Worked a treat.

If someone rolls their eyes or makes a fuss about taking a parcel for a neighbour I never ever ask them again.

I much more respect a flat out no.

DHL website: Your parcel is being delivered today, but there is a problem with the payment.
DHL person on the phone: Your parcel hasn't even cleared customs yet so won't be with your today, and you'll get an invoice after delivery if you owe any money. Your account doesn't have anything outstanding as far as I can tell.
Me: So why does your website say it is coming today, and that there is a problem with payment?
DHL person: Dunno, sorry.
Me: When is it going to arrive?
DHL person: Dunno, sorry.

Thanks DHL!

That’d be fine if we had the same postman. We used to have two we saw regularly often: Dog The Bounty Hunter and JBR, after the people they looked most like, but now it seems to be just random people.

The woman just came down an hour or so later and asked if I had a parcel. I just said yes, cheerfully, and handed it over. I wanted it to be the chap.

So I order something from the states and it gets lost. The global courier says they’ve given it to Royal Mail and Royal Mail day they haven’t got it.

I complain to the global courier and get my money back. Fairly satisfied but it was a Christmas present that I’m never going to see now so I’m going to harass them to find out what has gone on.

Global courier says go to Royal Mail.

Royal mails website is dogshit and wants me to request compensation, which I don’t want as I’ve got my money back already, so I get on the blower.

First bloke says “Can’t do anything. You’ve got to go to the courier” I explain I’ve gone to them and they’ve refunded it. “All sorted then. No more we can do.” Not even close mate, let’s see if we can investigate, aye? “No you’re not the sender so you can institute anything.” We’ll see about that.

I escalate it and get through to their escalations team and have a nice lady who gets increasingly annoyed as I explain I don’t want compensation I want to find out what’s happened to the package. She says nothing she can do. 15 minutes later and she’s going to email me a letter with a scan from their system when something logged to give to the global courier service and email the return’s place in Belfast to see if they can locate it.

Seriously, it seems the entire system is set up to fob you off. All they’re doing is reading is what’s on their computer and no one is willing to delv a little deeper. Of course they can’t find it by looking on their fucking computer, they need to instigate some kind of investigation with someone somewhere and it took ages to even get them to send an email to returns. The package wasn't just some bit of tat either - it was fairly sizeable and can’t just have vanished.

It’s probably for nowt, but at least I feel kinda satisfied that I made someone do something to look for it.

Tbh they’ve told you the right thing. The contract they have is with the seller, who is their customer, so if you’ve claimed with the seller and been refunded then that’s as far as it needs to go for you. Only the seller by rights can really demand RM investigates what happened to it and has to put in a claim with them to either locate the item or receive compensation.

I’ve got no doubt that what they were saying was right, it’s just not very helpful to finding out who has my package or where it went. I can’t get this particular item replaced either which is gutting and having my money refunded did little to assuage me. But with a little perseverance at least I know they’re doing something now. Some fuckers half inched it though. Cunts.

Interesting... At what point does the item become your property? Is it when you pay for it or when you receive it?

Once you receive it..

Legally it's at the moment it despatches, I'm fairly sure. It's not when you pay, because if it's mispriced companies can cancel the purchase even after you've paid, as long as they haven't sent it out.

That said, I'm not really sure what Sat is trying to achieve here.

Track down his custom made trico sex robot.