Bits and Bobs 20 - The important thing is...

Kern · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 8:23

Wouldn't shooting be swifter and less likely to go hideously wrong than failures to find the right vein or being fried by electricity?

Or are alternative methods of capital punishment designed to spare our blushes, not the unfortunate's?

devilman · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 8:25

MaliA wrote:

I note that the USA continues to behave in a dumbfuck fashion with the execution by firing squad this time. That and Obama being a complete knob over this BP thing, I think we should go back over there and sort them out, seeing as it was a score draw last time.

I was reading about that yesterday. The option for firing squad doesn't apply now, but the bloke was put on death row before the laws changed. Or something like that. It was interesting to read the likely process of how the execution would be carried out though.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 8:31

Kern wrote:

Wouldn't shooting be swifter and less likely to go hideously wrong than failures to find the right vein or being fried by electricity?

Probably, I'm half surprised that the firing squad didn't shoot each other, though.

Kern wrote:

Or are alternative methods of capital punishment designed to spare our blushes, not the unfortunates'?

Deffo the former.

The problem is this:

Americans lack the backbone to stand up and say "Killing people in the name of the state is barbaric and wrong, and is no deterrent in capital punishment". They lack the spine to do it, as the whole nation is apparently some 200 years behind the rest of the world in terms of "how shit should be done", and don't really act to change it, as the majority of the population are stupid, and the minority, who are clever enough to do something about it, are cowards.

So, the country rolls along in a hand cart, occupied by cowards and pushed by the stupid.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 8:46

Love mooves in mysterious ways

Quote:

Alit admitted to the act of bestiality but claimed the cow, which he believed was a young and beautiful woman, had wooed him with flattering compliments.

Cows are slags.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:04

Pull the udder one.

TheVision · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:05

They cud be making it up.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:12

MaliA wrote:

Love mooves in mysterious ways

Quote:

As part of the ceremony, Alit’s victim and new bride was drowned in ocean.

Hardly fair on the cow is it?

Grim... · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:23

MaliA wrote:

as the majority of the population are stupid

The majority of any large group of people is stupid.

Zardoz wrote:

MaliA wrote:

Love mooves in mysterious ways

Quote:

As part of the ceremony, Alit’s victim and new bride was drowned in ocean.

Hardly fair on the cow is it?

It's just a cow. Remind yourself of that next time you eat a burger.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:31

A nice story from Cornwall

Zardoz · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:32

Grim... wrote:

It's just a cow. Remind yourself of that next time you eat a burger.

WTF?

Why drown it though? It could have still worked, produced milk and then be slaughtered (or sent to the retirement field) at the usual time. They ended its life early because it got fucked by a freak, that's my issue.

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:37

MaliA wrote:

I note that the USA continues to behave in a dumbfuck fashion

Meanwhile, on this side of the pond, the Tories finally start to do mental and bad things so we can all breath a sigh of relief.

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to set up and run their own school. Specifically to teach creationism you can only assume. I mean SRSLY WTF?

What was the other one? Oh yes, in this time of financial disaster and urgent need to reduce spending, what better way to do that than increase wheelybin collections to once a week. I know that will go down well amongst some quarters here, and it probably is what won them most votes in the election but again, what a fucking stupid thing to do.

Grim... · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:40

kalmar wrote:

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to set up and run their own school. Specifically to teach creationism you can only assume. I mean SRSLY WTF?

No-one will.

kalmar wrote:

Oh yes, in this time of financial disaster and urgent need to reduce spending, what better way to do that than increase wheelybin collections to once a week.

Hurrah!

Mind you, that's local government, isn't it? And I've got to admit that it's been once a week forever in Bedfordshire (where I'm going) and once every two days at my flat in London (where I am).

If you're so concerned about the government spending money, help them out by not sending anything to those expensive recycling centres, and put it in a cheap hole in the ground instead. Short-term win!

Kern · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:45

The merry brochure with lots of pictures of happy trees that came through my door last week telling me that our bin service will be improved by cutting it to fortnightly also told me not to worry that all the variety of bins they're giving us will be microchipped. Yay for Liberal Democrat council's attacks on the surveillance state.

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:48

Erm, recycling earns money, at least on glass and tin.

Holes in the ground are not the cheap option, they have to be lined with this incredibly expensive stuff, land costs money, and having twice as many trucks trundling around collecting all the crap you're encouraging people to waste costs money too.

Bad decision. Costs a *lot* of money. Why do you think councils cut it in the first place, it wasn't greeny-weenie idealism y'know.

TheVision · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:50

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

markg · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 16560

We've had fortnightly collections for years (the recycling bins get collected one week and the black bin the next, I guess that's what people mean by fortnightly). I really don't understand what people's problem is. Certainly the predicted rat infestations and bubonic plagues have failed to materialise. I have to say that I don't much like the idea of slop buckets, though.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:51

Have you ever tried to fit a wheelybin in a microwave?

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:51

TheVision wrote:

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

Why would you do that? Then you're going to get charged the maximum rate for a full bin (like now) rather than based on the actual amount of the service that you've used.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:52

TheVision wrote:

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

I'd give it a day before JC flashes his new bins and adds LEDs.

TheVision · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:53

kalmar wrote:

TheVision wrote:

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

Why would you do that? Then you're going to get charged the maximum rate for a full bin (like now) rather than based on the actual amount of the service that you've used.

I... erm... just like breaking things... :droool:

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:53

TheVision wrote:

I... erm... just like breaking things... :droool:

markg · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 16560

kalmar wrote:

TheVision wrote:

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

Why would you do that? Then you're going to get charged the maximum rate for a full bin rather than based on the actual amount of the service that you've used.

I'm pretty sure that idea has been scrapped too.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

Very much like the O2 unlimited data, I don't think there's a single time in history that moving to a pay-per-use method rather than a fixed-fee unlimited usage method has ever made things cheaper for people. You'll end up paying more for a full bin, you certainly won't end up paying less for a half-empty bin.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

Grim... wrote:

kalmar wrote:

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to set up and run their own school. Specifically to teach creationism you can only assume. I mean SRSLY WTF?

No-one will.

Actually they already are. Toby Young was wanking on a week or two ago on Radio 4 about how he and other parents in his area are doing it - they got all prepared for the moment they could apply.

Quote:

If you're so concerned about the government spending money, help them out by not sending anything to those expensive recycling centres, and put it in a cheap hole in the ground instead. Short-term win!

Proper heh.

Kern · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:57

My main reason to be against fortnightly collections is I tend to forget what day is bin day at the moment. I really don't like the idea of a month's worth of rubbish festering in my garden because I got the days wrong. Happened from time to time when I lived in central Oxford, which has been fortnightly for years.

Also, I asked my LibDem councillors for instructions on how to disable them, to see what reaction I get.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

markg wrote:

kalmar wrote:

TheVision wrote:

I can't imagine those microchips would be too difficult to break.

Why would you do that? Then you're going to get charged the maximum rate for a full bin rather than based on the actual amount of the service that you've used.

I'm pretty sure that idea has been scrapped too.

It has, yes.

The chips are remaining solely for measuring the amount of recycled stuff in recycling bins in order to give residents rewards in the form of free tickets to local stuff like swimming pools. It's being trialled somewhere or other at present.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 9:57

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

HaHaHa!

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

MaliA wrote:

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

HaHaHa!

That's probably because 'student' doesn't come under the category of "highly skilled worker". I suggest Tier 4 "Students" or Tier 6 "Mighty Space Pirates".

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:00

MaliA wrote:

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

HaHaHa!

The wheelybin chips earn those points you know.

Grim... · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:03

Mr Kissyfur wrote:

Grim... wrote:

kalmar wrote:

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to set up and run their own school. Specifically to teach creationism you can only assume. I mean SRSLY WTF?

No-one will.

Actually they already are. Toby Young was wanking on a week or two ago on Radio 4 about how he and other parents in his area are doing it - they got all prepared for the moment they could apply.

I am ready to be surprised when they actually have a school. Who is Toby Young?

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:03

Craster wrote:

MaliA wrote:

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

HaHaHa!

That's probably because 'student' doesn't come under the category of "highly skilled worker". I suggest Tier 4 "Students" or Tier 6 "Mighty Space Pirates".

"You do not appear to have enough points to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under the skilled worker category of tier 2."

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

Keep trying.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:07

"You appear to have enough points to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') as a general (known as adult) student."

Grim... · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:10

MaliA wrote:

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

I don't have a high enough level of education to get past the 'education' section

chinnyhill10 · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 15695

kalmar wrote:

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to [b][i]set up and run their own school

Good morning children and welcome to the Lordsuralun Amstrad School, Brentwood.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:11

Grim... wrote:

MaliA wrote:

http://www.ukba.homeoffice.gov.uk/pointscalculator

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

I don't have a high enough level of education to get past the 'education' section

I'm quite surprised that the UKBA don't consider me awesome enough to let me stay, if I were a dirty forrin.

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:19

MaliA wrote:

I'm quite surprised that the UKBA don't consider me awesome enough to let me stay, if I were a dirty forrin.

And you believed Cameron when he said the government made it far too easy, leading to hordes or dirty forrins staying, didn't you.

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:20

kalmar wrote:

MaliA wrote:

I'm quite surprised that the UKBA don't consider me awesome enough to let me stay, if I were a dirty forrin.

And you believed Cameron when he said the government made it far too easy, leading to hordes or dirty forrins staying, didn't you.

Given last year I wrote on immigration law, no.

kalmar · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:20

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:21

Doctor Glyndwr · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 32619

MaliA wrote:

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

You're officially of less use to the UK economy than sista flapjack!

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:23

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

MaliA wrote:

"You do not appear to have enough points to be able to apply for permission to stay in the United Kingdom (known as 'leave to remain') under Tier 1 (General)."

You're officially of less use to the UK economy than sista flapjack!

<proud>

MaliA · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:25

Merkinania does it like this:

http://i.imgur.com/2pkT9.jpg

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

Grim... wrote:

Mr Kissyfur wrote:

Grim... wrote:

kalmar wrote:

Today: any random tom dick or harry with a chip on their shoulder, or ruthless entrepreneur, can get government money to set up and run their own school. Specifically to teach creationism you can only assume. I mean SRSLY WTF?

No-one will.

Actually they already are. Toby Young was wanking on a week or two ago on Radio 4 about how he and other parents in his area are doing it - they got all prepared for the moment they could apply.

I am ready to be surprised when they actually have a school. Who is Toby Young?

A particularly twatty journalist. Wrote "how to lose friends and alienate people", and writes for the Spectator and Torygraph.

Doctor Glyndwr · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 32619

MaliA wrote:

Merkinania does it like this: http://i.imgur.com/2pkT9.jpg

Oh, aye. There's a reason I'm not going there.

devilman · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 10:36

Kern wrote:

My main reason to be against fortnightly collections is I tend to forget what day is bin day at the moment. I really don't like the idea of a month's worth of rubbish festering in my garden because I got the days wrong. Happened from time to time when I lived in central Oxford, which has been fortnightly for years.

I forget every week and have to rely on the leaflet that the council sent me with the dates of the various collections.

markg · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 16560

devilman wrote:

Kern wrote:

My main reason to be against fortnightly collections is I tend to forget what day is bin day at the moment. I really don't like the idea of a month's worth of rubbish festering in my garden because I got the days wrong. Happened from time to time when I lived in central Oxford, which has been fortnightly for years.

I forget every week and have to rely on the leaflet that the council sent me with the dates of the various collections.

I usually just look through the window in the morning and see what bins everyone else has put out.

BikNorton · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 10078

MaliA wrote:

Given last year I wrote on immigration law, no.

Did you get in trouble? I remember at school someone wrote on a maths book and there was hell to pay.

Zardoz · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 11:06

markg wrote:

I usually just look through the window in the morning and see what bins everyone else has put out.

...and see if there's room in theirs to put our overspill into. :ninja:

Grim... · **Posted:** Fri Jun 18, 2010 11:16

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I'm going to fucking fire somebody.

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits and Bobs 20 - The important thing is...
...nobody got pregnant.

Who is online

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits and Bobs 20 - The important thing is... ...nobody got pregnant.

Who is online

Bits and Bobs 20 - The important thing is...
...nobody got pregnant.