Be Excellent To Each Other

Two weapons that, once you use them too much, stop working entirely. My Louisville Slugger is on standby halfway up the stairs.

Might I suggest an aluminium baseball bat as the ideal combination of the practicality Grim... demands and the pimp factor Zardoz desires?

Hang on a sec - are we seriously letting Myp repopulate the planet?

Hells no, the Z man can ride shotgun (literally) with me in the Tomcat.

Hang on a sec - are we seriously letting Myp repopulate the planet?

.I represent the Zombie Ogranised Mutilation Group (ZOMG). We endorse the use of explosives. Generally.

top-secret zombie proof base

Of course the flaw in your plan is that 'no one else in the area has already thought of this plan'...possibly bigger, more psychotic and better equipped people.

I was thinking about what Glesga cathedral looks like & it seemed like a good idea, then I remembered what else is next to cathedrals... huge fucking graveyards

If the dead are going to rise I don't think I want to be anywhere near the Necropolis or similar.

more psychotic and better equipped people in Scotland will be making their way to Buckfast Abbey

Graveyards with withered skeletons of people who died a bajillion years ago!

I live near there.

I concur. Anyway, a zombie apocalypse would be creepy enough without being holed up in a cathedral!

If you're stuck in a town, a high-rise office is the tried and tested solution, like that guy in New Orleans keeping the Something Awful server running during that hurricane.

Choose the RBS building or similar - you've got generators, provisions in the canteen, and reasonable defences to start with. Seal off the ground level and sit tight until the Finnish army gets in touch.

I disagree. I've swung a claymore; those things are incredibly heavy.

Seal off is the first step sure. But you want to demolish the stairs. Once you've properly demolished the stairs you are close to 100% secure. Zombies can't climb after all. Of course, anyone who can't climb a rope ladder is fucked, but they would probably be fucked anyhow.

Use the roof to collect rain water (and even grow food) whilst you wait for the Zombies to rot after their food source dries out.

A bunch of flat roofed buildings in close proximity would be even better...

Do you live near Macclesfield, Cheshire? Did you know there's a secret structure (below) built into the side of Billinge Hill at Rainow? It's hidden inside the south eastern part of the disused Billinge Quarries on Blaze Hill. All the other parts of the old quarry workings have been filled in and are now overgrown with vegetation. But this location has a gated access road, a recently well-used hardstanding area and what seems to be a blast door entrance to a bunker with four ventilation shafts on top!

Astonishingly, the gate is just a standard one you'd find on a farm track and the security is low key to say the least. But the sign warns that 24 hour emergency access is required and that trespass is prohibited under the Explosives Act! Why would explosives be stored at a disused quarry? They wouldn't be stored there when it was active – a remote store would be used. Why is there no permanent guarding?

I had heard persistent rumours that whenever there is an incident threatening national security, the local police are sent up to this site to guard it for the duration of the state of high alert. There has been so much speculation regarding its purpose, from avid readers of Secret Bases, that I decided to settle the matter by performing a Freedom of Information Act request to the Health and Safety Executive (HSE). Within just a matter of days, they very kindly responded with the full details!

After all the excitement, disappointingly there's no mysterious MoD bunker concealing covert military operations. However, my FOI request to HSE revealed the owner of the site as a very interesting local business, using it since 1978.

It turns out to be Edgar Brothers located on Macclesfield's Lyme Green Business Park in Unit 3 on Heather Close. Originally founded in 1947, they are one of the UK's oldest, well-established importers and wholesale dealers in firearms, ammunition and associated products. As well as the obvious sporting and leisure clients, through their Police and Military Division (PMD) they are official suppliers of guns, knives, high power torches, weapon lights, clothing and footwear to all UK Police Forces and MoD.

That's a funny name for a shopping centre.

It's a subsidiary of Home Base.

Zombie-pocolypse first stop off point #mystery" class="postlink">SUPER GO

I can be there in ooh, 20 minutes from home

a two-headed flail.

for the lesbians?

Wait, what's a flail again?

Edit: Also, going to scotland is the Wrong Way (unless you're near there already). What you want is the isle of wight. Fertile, small, low population, but some basic supplies, and well within reach of the mainland. Downside: zombies and natives will be difficult to tell apart.

Strong Atlantic currents and unusual underwater topography conspire to produce a particularly intense tidal race in the Corryvreckan channel. As the flood tide enters the narrow area between the two islands it speeds up to 8.5 knots (≈16 km/h), and also meets a variety of seabed features including a deep hole and a rising pinnacle. These features combine to create whirlpools, standing waves and a variety of other surface effects.

The Corryvreckan is the third largest whirlpool in the world, and is on the northern side of the gulf, surrounding a pyramid-shaped basalt pinnacle that rises from depths of 70 m to 29 m at its rounded top. Flood tides and inflow from the Firth of Lorne to the west can drive the waters of Corryvreckan to waves of over 30 feet (9 m), and the roar of the resulting maelstrom can be heard ten miles (16 km) away.

If a load of Zombies tried following after the boat but where eaten by sharks/prawns/halibut would the fish/crustaceans become infected?

There'd be no difference in their behaviour really, as nearly everything at sea eats flesh.

There'd be no difference in their behaviour really, as nearly everything at sea eats flesh.

lack of success.

Only if you're Chinese.