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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 13:47 
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Master of dodgy spelling....

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Cras wrote:
Well that's a stupid fucking question. You'd have a dinosaur.


Craster is right... in this case.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 13:48 
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Cras wrote:
Well that's a stupid fucking question. You'd have a dinosaur.

Only until your enemies SHOOT HER. SHOOOOOOT HER.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 14:37 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

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GazChap wrote:
Cras wrote:
Well that's a stupid fucking question. You'd have a dinosaur.

Only until your enemies SHOOT HER. SHOOOOOOT HER.

BUT there is a chance your enemies would get flanked and say "Clever girl" before getting chomped.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 15:36 
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Bad Girl

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Bloody hell, I forgot that Lindsey Lohan gets her tatties out.

Machete is good.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 16:19 
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Satsuma wrote:
Bloody hell, I forgot that Lindsey Lohan gets her tatties out.

Machete is good.


I might have read back at the time that it's a body double. I'm not going to Google to verify while I'm at work though.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 16:28 
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Sleepyhead

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Bamba wrote:
Satsuma wrote:
Bloody hell, I forgot that Lindsey Lohan gets her tatties out.

Machete is good.


I might have read back at the time that it's a body double. I'm not going to Google to verify while I'm at work though.


Would seem odd for to to be a double, since she has disrobed in many other instances, but you never know.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 17:00 
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Bad Girl

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The internet appears to suggest you’re right. I’m not too fussed though. Tatties are tatties.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 17:02 
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Curiosity wrote:
Bamba wrote:
Satsuma wrote:
Bloody hell, I forgot that Lindsey Lohan gets her tatties out.

Machete is good.


I might have read back at the time that it's a body double. I'm not going to Google to verify while I'm at work though.


Would seem odd for to to be a double, since she has disrobed in many other instances, but you never know.



Bear in mind though that Machete was released in 2010 which might pre-date anything else.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 17:43 
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Bad Girl

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No hang on, there’s definitely a scene where you can see some pure Lohan nip. The scene earlier may be a double but that was nothing but LoNip.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 17:46 
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Bad Girl

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There. Look, there. I’m telling you, that’s a nip.

NSFW obv.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 18:13 
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ugvm'er at heart...

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Doing god's work, satsuma


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 04, 2018 23:42 
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Can you dig it?

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Our kids have been watching Coraline quite a bit over the last week. I really enjoyed it and was quite taken by the unsettling atmosphere. Our eldest though is most amused by the fact there are some (puppet) boobs (partially sequin covered) on show during part of it. I'm not sure how much of the message behind the film he really gets but it doesn't really matter to me - they are enjoying it.

Also watched the new Jurassic World (er... the subtitle is fallen kingdom I think) and it was fun if a bit lightweight. Also, is it really important if the dinos get out? Humans are so good effective at hunting and killing things that it really wouldn't matter much would it? Those dumb dinos would get capped in days.

I do like Chris Pratt but I didn't really feel he was well used in this film. It was nice hearing the classic Jurassic Park theme in the end credit music.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2018 5:33 
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SavyGamer

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Get them watching Kubo and the two strings too.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2018 7:57 
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Gogmagog

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Sir Taxalot wrote:
Our kids have been watching Coraline quite a bit over the last week. I really enjoyed it and was quite taken by the unsettling atmosphere. Our eldest though is most amused by the fact there are some (puppet) boobs (partially sequin covered) on show during part of it. I'm not sure how much of the message behind the film he really gets but it doesn't really matter to me - they are enjoying it.



The Big One has found my copy and expressed a desire to watch it. I think 4 is too young, maybe7 or 8. It is a brilliant film. The Watership Down Clock has moved back of late, due to good behaviour.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 05, 2018 9:22 
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Can you dig it?

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Ours are 6, 4, and 2 (rounded, roughly). The 4 year old is keenest, doesn’t seem bothered by the darker themes but she’s quite mature. The 2 year old doesn’t give a shit about anything, at all, so they’ve all seemed ok with it. YMMV, obviously.

I didn’t actually know much about the film before they saw it. I actually thought it was a ‘nicer’ kids film until I saw it myself.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 06, 2018 12:27 
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Bad Girl

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Venom: wot I thunk

Michelle Williams is an amazing talented actor. She was also Jen in Dawson’s Creek and I love her. She has some decent chemistry with Tom Hardy. She starts off as a woman with a good job and basically just a womanly woman. This is good. Then, for some reason, she’s shoved into a short plaid skirt and dressed like a sexualised school girl. It was unnecessary and I’d have preferred them keeping her as a proper woman. She’s too good for that. As the love interest she’s relegated to a bit part but she did an alright job. Also there’s a conflict between her and Tom, of course, when he causes a monumental breach of trust. It gets her sacked from her job and they refer to this as the reason she’s upset with Tom. But it isn’t: it was the breach of trust and I’d have preferred they hammer this home rather than “I lost my job cause of you”. That happened but it wasn’t the reason their relationship fell apart.

Tom has an MRI scan goes a bit nuts. The doctor starts to power down the MRI and rushes in to make sure Toms alright. The doctor is clearly seen WEARING A WATCH. His arm would have been ripped off for God’s sake. Well, maybe not, but he should have known better.

The CGI is bad and the action sequences are very, very bad. I thought it was as bad as a Transformers movie but my friend thought it was worse. Why so bad: 1) almost all the sequences are filmed outside at night. Venom is black and his antics can barely be seen. 2) Venom and the black goo aliens are basically formless and the fight sequences are just swirling CGI mass of goop filling the screen. It’s shit. 3) To make matters worse the camera uses handy cam things for some sequences and handy cams do not make for good action sequences. In the dark. With a formless black goo. 3) there’s an epilepsy inducing bike ride sequence filmed with handy cam in the dark where the only thing you can see are the headlights of the traffic spinning around the screen. I actually felt sick watching it which I’ve never experienced before.

What about the plot: usual boring stuff about aliens. And people were all weird about aliens when the earth had been ravaged by aliens in The Avengers and superheroes exist so why’s this a big deal? Turns out it’s not in the same universe as the rest of the marvel films but I didn’t know that at the time so I was all confused why Tom was taking the piss about aliens. Meh.

Tom is merely alright but his relationship with Venom turns out really funny. Half of the film is a bag of shit but then it’s surprisingly hilarious. It’s a shame that this is an origin story because had they gone straight into Venom stuff I reckon it could have been really good. But then again I didn’t know much about Venom... but then again, what’s so hard, it’s a guy who shares his body with an alien? That’s probably why the new Spider-Man worked cause we skip the introductions and just smash on with the funnies.

I walked away thinking “hey I kinda liked that” but that’s probably because the back half was funny Venom stuff but thinking back on what I saw as a package it was merely 5/10 and probably worse than that, but it could set up a really great sequel. But if they did that they’d need to do a couple of things: film during the day, sort out the CGI, film it properly not like Michael J Fox is holding the camera and just have loads of fun with Venom and how he interferes with Tom’s life rather than some baddie of the day. That’d be a great film - Tom trying to win back Jen from Dawson’s Creek rather than fighting some big baddie. That’d subvert expectations. Won’t happen.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sun Oct 14, 2018 9:02 
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Hello Hello Hello

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Another vote for Deadpool 2 from me, I'd say it's as good as the first one, albeit no better.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Tue Oct 16, 2018 19:47 
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Bad Girl

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Tombstone is a funny old film. Kurt Russell is great, Val Kilmer is great and RIP Bill Paxton is great. Loads of people are great in it. Plus basically the protagonists go on a murderous rampage and just slaughter tens of men in cold blood. It’s kinda brutal.

But the thing that bothers me most is the relationship between Kurt Russell and his wife. He basically makes gooey eyes at some other tramp about twice during the film but doesn’t do anything about it. He bundles his wife off on train just before the murder rampage so she doesn’t get killed but then we don’t hear anything about her after that. Instead the film weirdly ends with Kurt hooking up with this tramp at Christmas. Fade to black. It’s just a fucking stupid ending to what was otherwise a great western.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Tue Oct 16, 2018 21:07 
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Just watched Land of Mine on Amazon Prime.

It's about very young German POWs forced to clear landmines in post-war Denmark, and is about as jolly as it sounds. Very well-shot and paced, and, as you can imagine, very harrowing. Not too graphic, but that makes it even more powerful.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 17, 2018 22:58 
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Satsuma wrote:
I watched Free Fire. It's exec produced by Scorsese, so you know I gots to see what that's about.

The whole film is set in a shoot out between some peeps and stars that South African guy from District 9 and some other folk with familiar faces but names I don't know. It's good but isn't really saying much.

Conclusion: fun but disposable. Check it out.

Disposable Me out of 10.

I thought it was a bit crap.

There was a lot of crawling.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 12:02 
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Grim... wrote:
There was a lot of crawling.


It would be a significantly shorter film if they didn't.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 19:50 
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Bad Girl

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The Spy Who Dumped Me is fucking awful. Kate McKinnon is terrible and, if you didn’t already know, is not funny at all. So it’s worst than dogshit but the weird thing is that the action sequences are really good. This one fight in a restaurant is just groovy, this car chase is pretty great and so on. Everything else shit. Honestly though, the script is fucking wank but it might have been salvaged by better actors in the main roles. I’ve got a feeling that they let Kate Unfunny McKinnon have too much creative control. I absolutely love Mila Kunis and I’m sure she’s a lovely person but her movie career is on the same trajectory as Jessica Alba.

3/10 for the absolutely great action sequences -2 for Kate McKinnon ruining everything she touches so 1/10


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 20:21 
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I really like Kate McKinnon

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 20:23 
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Cras wrote:
I really like Kate McKinnon

And I really dislike Sat’s opinions about movies and TV shows!


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 20:26 
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Doctor Glyndwr wrote:
Cras wrote:
I really like Kate McKinnon

And I really dislike Sat’s opinions about movies and TV shows!

I agree with you both!

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 20:56 
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It's weird, it's like there always *has* to be someone on the forum to fill the position of "the one that's wrong about everything". Like I'm sure Sat used to have normal opinions, then Nirejhenge stopped coming around and here we are. I bet if Mr Chris posted more Sat would drift back to normal again.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 21:30 
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Bamba wrote:
It's weird, it's like there always *has* to be someone on the forum to fill the position of "the one that's wrong about everything".

There’s always a wrong ‘un. Look around. If you don’t see the wrong ‘un, I got bad news for you.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Thu Oct 18, 2018 21:50 
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Doctor Glyndwr wrote:
Bamba wrote:
It's weird, it's like there always *has* to be someone on the forum to fill the position of "the one that's wrong about everything".

There’s always a wrong ‘un. Look around. If you don’t see the wrong ‘un, I got bad news for you.


When I look around everyone *but* me is the wrong'un. I'm sure that doesn't mean anything.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 13:45 
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Master of dodgy spelling....

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Satsuma wrote:
Venom: wot I thunk

Michelle Williams is an amazing talented actor. She was also Jen in Dawson’s Creek and I love her. She has some decent chemistry with Tom Hardy. She starts off as a woman with a good job and basically just a womanly woman. This is good. Then, for some reason, she’s shoved into a short plaid skirt and dressed like a sexualised school girl. It was unnecessary and I’d have preferred them keeping her as a proper woman. She’s too good for that. As the love interest she’s relegated to a bit part but she did an alright job. Also there’s a conflict between her and Tom, of course, when he causes a monumental breach of trust. It gets her sacked from her job and they refer to this as the reason she’s upset with Tom. But it isn’t: it was the breach of trust and I’d have preferred they hammer this home rather than “I lost my job cause of you”. That happened but it wasn’t the reason their relationship fell apart.

Tom has an MRI scan goes a bit nuts. The doctor starts to power down the MRI and rushes in to make sure Toms alright. The doctor is clearly seen WEARING A WATCH. His arm would have been ripped off for God’s sake. Well, maybe not, but he should have known better.

The CGI is bad and the action sequences are very, very bad. I thought it was as bad as a Transformers movie but my friend thought it was worse. Why so bad: 1) almost all the sequences are filmed outside at night. Venom is black and his antics can barely be seen. 2) Venom and the black goo aliens are basically formless and the fight sequences are just swirling CGI mass of goop filling the screen. It’s shit. 3) To make matters worse the camera uses handy cam things for some sequences and handy cams do not make for good action sequences. In the dark. With a formless black goo. 3) there’s an epilepsy inducing bike ride sequence filmed with handy cam in the dark where the only thing you can see are the headlights of the traffic spinning around the screen. I actually felt sick watching it which I’ve never experienced before.

What about the plot: usual boring stuff about aliens. And people were all weird about aliens when the earth had been ravaged by aliens in The Avengers and superheroes exist so why’s this a big deal? Turns out it’s not in the same universe as the rest of the marvel films but I didn’t know that at the time so I was all confused why Tom was taking the piss about aliens. Meh.

Tom is merely alright but his relationship with Venom turns out really funny. Half of the film is a bag of shit but then it’s surprisingly hilarious. It’s a shame that this is an origin story because had they gone straight into Venom stuff I reckon it could have been really good. But then again I didn’t know much about Venom... but then again, what’s so hard, it’s a guy who shares his body with an alien? That’s probably why the new Spider-Man worked cause we skip the introductions and just smash on with the funnies.

I walked away thinking “hey I kinda liked that” but that’s probably because the back half was funny Venom stuff but thinking back on what I saw as a package it was merely 5/10 and probably worse than that, but it could set up a really great sequel. But if they did that they’d need to do a couple of things: film during the day, sort out the CGI, film it properly not like Michael J Fox is holding the camera and just have loads of fun with Venom and how he interferes with Tom’s life rather than some baddie of the day. That’d be a great film - Tom trying to win back Jen from Dawson’s Creek rather than fighting some big baddie. That’d subvert expectations. Won’t happen.


Went to see this last night, I think i disagree with some the above comments. It was laugh out loud funny in places, mainly the internal Brock/Venom arguments. MrsKov really enjoyed it too

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:01 
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Another person disagreeing with Sat? I don't believe it.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:04 
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Bad Girl

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Meh. I have my reasons.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:32 
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INFINITE POWAH

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How young is too young to get your kids watching the best musical ever*?


*Blues Brothers, not Frozen.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:51 
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Blues Brothers contains a lot of swearing, and you might have to do some explaining about the Illinois Nazis, but other than that it should be fine.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:54 
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Isn't that lovely?

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I watched it when I was 12 or 13, I think that's a pretty good age to watch it. I think I let my youngest watch it at aged 10, and was cringing a bit at how much swearing there was in there. and Grim...'s right, explaining some of it was tricky.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 15:55 
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INFINITE POWAH

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Grim... wrote:
Blues Brothers contains a lot of swearing, and you might have to do some explaining about the Illinois Nazis, but other than that it should be fine.

I don't remember that much swearing... to be fair I don't think i've ever watcher it sober. :)

The nazi bit they'd understand and get though.

Swearing-wise, we've been listening to the audiobook version of the Book of Dust by Philip Pullman and Jesus fucking christ it's sweary. It'd be an 18 as a film.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 19:27 
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Gogmagog

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Prometheus was terrible. It was pretty good right up tp the point where they encountered the thing and then it went downhill faster than Missy Giove.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 21:29 
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Commander-in-Cheese

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MaliA wrote:
Prometheus was terrible. It was pretty good right up tp the point where they encountered the thing and then it went downhill faster than Missy Giove.


No, it went bad about 5 years before the film when somebody wrote the colony ship procedure handbook.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 22:29 
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Hey, Prometheus did launch five years before they got into trouble, in 2088.

Solid Alien lore, Cras!

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 22:30 
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Although I suspect you're thinking of Covenant.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 22:37 
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I mean, I am, but let's not get that in the way of praising me.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Fri Oct 26, 2018 23:50 
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Prince of Fops

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MaliA wrote:
Prometheus was terrible. It was pretty good right up tp the point where they encountered the thing and then it went downhill faster than Missy Giove.


Good for kids though.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2018 7:07 
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SavyGamer

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A shame about Covenant. I think it could have been a decent sci fi movie, but it was held back a lot by being both a Prometheus sequel and an Alien movie.

The core theme was interesting (a conflict between two AI characters, one loyal to the creators and one not), but it was bogged down By a bunch of irrelevant stuff.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2018 22:33 
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Sad I won't get the 90 mins spent watching the Similars back again.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2018 22:51 
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Tonight we watched Halloween (1978.) Holds up pretty well.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2018 23:06 
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Lonewolves wrote:
Sad I won't get the 90 mins spent watching the Similars back again.


I heard good things but haven't watched yet as imagined it would be a tough watch. Just no good?


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sat Oct 27, 2018 23:18 
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Findus Fop wrote:
Lonewolves wrote:
Sad I won't get the 90 mins spent watching the Similars back again.


I heard good things but haven't watched yet as imagined it would be a tough watch. Just no good?

It's not a tough watch at all. It has a good premise and the first 30 mins is pretty good, but it doesn't really go anywhere and the ending is rubbish.

Also it commits the cardinal sin of horror—it just isn't scary.

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2018 13:41 
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Having rewatched them both several times, Covenant and Prometheus have really grown on me, notwithstanding the obvious inconsistencies they have created twixt themselves and the Alien(s) films.

I've wanted to rewatch AVP and AVP2 (god that film's unnecessarily brutal, in a good way), and Predators, but I got rid of my DVDs of them when I thinned the collection before emigrating ... I'm oldschool and haven't backed up any DVDs... :-/

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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2018 14:09 
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Bad Girl

Joined: 20th Apr, 2008
Posts: 14353
Ocean’s 8 has an all female cast of lovelies who can act. It’s not a bad film by any stretch of the imagination but the heist story has worn thin over so many films and it fails to be a compelling watch. There are some decent performances but I just found myself terribly bored, especially during the middle.

I’d say 5/10.

James Corden is in it.

So 3/10.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Sun Oct 28, 2018 16:30 
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Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 14130
Location: Shropshire, UK
Ocean's 11-13 worked really well because the ensemble cast clearly had great chemistry with each other, and as a result it was thoroughly entertaining (12 less so, obvs)

Ocean's 8... they just don't gel in the same way.


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 Post subject: Re: The Movie topic
PostPosted: Mon Oct 29, 2018 9:56 
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Sleepyhead

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 27343
Location: Kidbrooke
I liked Venom. Didn’t find the CGI or action hard to follow other than in the last fight where it went a bit OTT.

Agree with Sat that Michelle Williams is ace, and her outfit choice was stupid.

It started very slowly, but once Venom was actually there it was ace. The best bits, as everyone said, were the conversations between Eddie Brock and Venom.

Would definitely watch a sequel.

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