Be Excellent To Each Other

I have a fishtank with more neons than that.

Does anyone know where I can buy a cat. 1 car alarm that fucking *doesn't* have the ability to close all the windows and lock the doors and SMS your phone and other bullshit?
Why doesn't there seem to be a decent car alarm website on the Internet?

/goes off to check Maplins

Maplins is rubbish. Looks like it's ebay again.

The only one I can think of off the top of my head is Demon Tweeks Have a look under security

Is the sounder on their alarms a 24in bass tube?

Grim... and his new car alarm:

Get a TOAD Ai606. They're cheap, and fairly basic but can be expanded to have more features if you need it later. I've got one on my GT-Four and (apart from it being a little bit too sensitive when I've got the windows open and the car locked) it's trouble-free.

I can dial the sensitivity down a bit but frankly I can't be arsed.

Just make sure you get it fitted properly otherwise you won't get the Thatcham Cat.1 certificate and it'll be worthless to your insurance.

I've got no doors, yo.

What exactly do you want from the alarm, then?

If it's just an immobiliser you're after, the TOAD Ai606 will do that too.

It'll need an immobiliser, and just a "door is being opened" microswitch that I can put in the gearbox to go off if it's taken out of park.

Can you not just rig up an old fashioned switch immobiliser and hide the switch somewhere really awkward and not obvious? Obviously this is nowhere near as good, but it's pretty effective if you hide the switch properly.

Yes, you need to specify what the objective is.

I had one of these in an old car (in fact I still have the unit if you want it): http://www.amazon.co.uk/SPARKRITE-SRA2- ... 494&sr=1-1

Once it's armed (via the remote) it will start howling if either:
Voltage drop is detected, i.e. someone tries to start it (normally detects the courtesy light, so wire any extra detector switches up through a resistor or small bulb to have the desired effect)

Or, the vehicle is thumped - it just worked on loud noises, adjustable setting, as the unit was under the bonnet.

Pretty simple.

There is an output to say it's been triggered which you can use to immobilise the car as well, I didn't bother with that.

So if that's what you need, I recommend that.

Objective? It's a car alarm, not a GNVQ project. It need to go 'beep' a lot if someone tries to steal the car.

I guess it would key on voltage drops (from the starter motor) and gearstick movement, but I honestly don't care - this is to please Mr Insurance rather than stop it from being stolen - it won't have a steering wheel in when there's no-one in it, and it's got a tracker in case they throw it on a trailer.

The AA relay is not a pointless expense.

Car engine went boom halfway down the M1 yesterday bringing all my stuff back from uni. Engine + Big hole = dead car.
But thank god for AA relay, brought us all the way home, car still knackered, but at least we managed to get home

You just have to make sure the driver's not American or he might drop the baton halfway home.

Good, that's what I guessed - like the one I suggested then? It does that and more for 20 quid.


Yep, see the one I suggested, it does that.



Ah, that's a different objective altogether, and completely opposite to the one above. Expect to pay hundreds for an "approved" model and have it "professionally" fitted.
I can't help you there.

That's right, that's why it has to be a cat. 1 model, which is what I was moaning about.
Bah.

Ah, bah indeed.

I know, fucking insurers.
"It'll have an alarm."
"Is it a cat. 1 model?"
"Does it matter?"
"Yes, only cat. 1 models count."
"Oh. Did I mention it's in a locked compound?"
"Yes."
"With security patrols with dogs?"
"Yes."
"And that it has a tracker?"
"Yes."
"And I remove the steering wheel when I'm not in it?"
"Yes."
"And none of that matters?"
"Nope."
"Fuxake."

Park it with full lock right, then remove the steering wheel. Don't do this on a roundabout.

New exhaust received yesterday and fitted last night, with the help of two spanners, an angle grinder, a large assortment of big hammers and a dad.

It's not exactly subtle:


But it sounds perfect, not too loud but just deeper and more purposeful with a lovely note at high revs and some nice popping and burbling on the overrun. Exactly how they should sound from the off really.

Also it's about £350 worth but I bought it off someone for £50 so even if I did want it quieter again I reckon I can probably double my money.

What spanners did you use? Baz & Alan?

Looks nice mate, maybe take it for a spin down to London on July 25 eh?

Nice one mrak!
I shall finish off my list of heroic repair effort on my still worthless Corsa:



Bought: front brake discs (£30) - total now 235.

Changed the discs to go with the new pads (probably for the best).
Bled the brakes.
Welded up a big hole in the silencer.
Wiggled the connector on the brake light until it started working.

Passed MOT on Wednesday, no additional problems. MOT guy said he was impressed with the work, it's better than they usually get brought from a cheaper garage nearby.

So, result. I fully expect the engine to blow up now, just for the sake of it.

Count down to it throwing a conrod has begun.

In other news, nobody's bought the bloody Capri. As it has a week's insurance left, I might take it to the drag strip on sunday and either blow it up or obtain a timeslip.

Is it electric?

No, Petril. Hence why I've no interest in keeping it.

My mate the scrappy just told me "if the car is drivable, just drive it there. The police might follow you, but it's the same as going to an MOT. Just send the slip off to DVLA and all is good". So, that's monday planned.

Not heard that before.

Yeah, I'd be careful there Mali, I'm pretty sure the only exception is on the way to a booked MOT.

If it's not taxed you can be done even if you've parked it or are towing it on the road, never mind driving it. A policeman might have the same opinion as your scrappy mate but it'd be a bit of a gamble.

When I've had undrivable ones in the past I just hire a transit flatbed or borrow a trailer and haul it on there.

That said, this is coming from someone who's been happily running a car with an 8-month expired MOT, so do as I say not as I do

I think it will be a mean old copper that will do you for towing it there, unless it has three wheels or something.

What'chu talking about?
/

I'll run it out in non rush hour and take the chance, probably.

Fair enough. If the scrappy is your mate, can't he do you favour and pick it up, like?
They have trucks for picking cars up, and that.

Costs money, so I'd end up paying. I'll give the DVLA a call on Monday and ask them what the 411 is.

4-11? Stray horse on the road, officer attending?

The road from Bushey to Barnet?

You bustahs just ain't krunk enough to flow what MC Afterthought is spinnin', yo.

10-79 on that, B.

And don't be the poor bastard you drive into.

Heh.

Where's that website that allows you to insure a car for a day? 205 is going to scrappies tomorrow <sobs>

https://www.tempcover.com/

Or you can sign up for any insurance over the phone and then cancel it within 14 days (cooling off period or whatever)

It's a bit academic though.

Although obviously should you need to claim that won't work.

It took me 3 sweaty hours to change the spring on that Jag. They don't make 'em... sensibly.

MaliA, yesterday.

After much thinking, and working through my list of things that we 'need' in a new second hand car, the winner was a....

Fiat Multipla.

MrsA has killed this idea.

She's rubbish.

When are the twins due Mali?

If you bought a Fiat Multipla, I would come round and kill you.

While I burnt the car.