Be Excellent To Each Other

Shit, he's catching on to the huge underground 'No Grim...s club' forum hosted entirely though PMs with Zardoz.

Huh. I was pretty sure it wasn't a funny one, so I went to take a look.

I'm going to set Myp's inbox to a max of 7 now.

I certainly wouldn't go so far as to say it was funny, either, you're right.

IT WAS FUNNY.

Seven, eh? That gives me a wiggle room of seven.

Now, I don't want to sound like some sort Government pawn or environmental/speed-kills hippy, but I can quite imagine that the M42 would be a fucking nightmare if it weren't for the variable speed limits (when they're not taking the piss). It's actually quite calming.

The problem with the M25 is that even with variable limits it's just not big enough. Also, the cameras are on something like 1 in 5 (fairly widely spaced) gantries, might not have film in them anyway, and are only certain stretches, so don't really help much. Fucking use SPECS all over or nothing, you half-hearted, not helping despite spending tens of millions fucks. Still, at least they seem to be applying proper traffic flow modelling to the junctions at last, instead of leaving it as the inadequate circle it was before.

You can't be calm on the M42, given it was deliberately made from the most irregular and mismatched concrete slabs they could find. It's like driving down a flight of stairs.



The last time I was on the M25 (May bank holiday) the gantries couldn't make their minds up and one said 40, another said 60, then 40 again. Besides, people just slow down to go under them and then speed back up to 70 as often the speed limit is imposed for no good reason.

The section of M4 in question is fairly busy and with a few fairly tight bends in it (the Bryn Glas tunnels being the worst bit for accidents) but this restriction extends for a long way in either direction where the road is wide and straight. Certainly the 50mph section through Port Toilet feels justified as it's very narrow and windy but the lower limit ONLY COVERS THAT BIT.

Fix quotes dude! I never said twat! That time, anyway!

I almost find the M42 relaxing, because it's always restricted when I hit it. As I said before, i'd hate to be restricted the whole way, but that 20 minutes gives me a bit of a rest without stopping.

Pissing about with the variable limits is the main problem with them - back when they first did it on the M42, there was a definite sense of them watching the cameras and picking on people.

The speeding up between gantries is why I think everything but SPECS should be binned as a total waste of money - average speed measurement is the only/best alternative to humans at every step.

It's not even just as a calming measure - in Norfolk, on a flat, open derestricted section I overtook a van doing 50 as safely as I could; obviously that meant accelerating hard past, then slowing - unfortunately, there was a Truvelo hidden by the van. Judging by the amount of time since, my near emergency stop in front of a Luton took enough speed off in time to avoid a fine. So in fact the fucking camera was the only thing to introduce danger into the situation. If it'd been SPECS, the mile behind the van going 15% below the limit would've evened out the short time above it, and I needn't have worried.

My other posts clearly show I don't want cameras everywhere, but when the stats (assuming the figures are totally open to everyone for analysis) show speeds need calming (or in roadwork situations), I'm all for SPECS monitoring. I am dead against everything else, including fixed-point human-operated guns. It's just stupid and unfair.

The problem with SPECS is that it's all very well for a short periods but you can end up driving like a robot. One of the biggest dangers truck drivers face is nodding off or losing attention because they drive along on the limiter.

The variables on the M25 seem to work quite well. However the section where it goes from five lane to three lane at the M3 needs improving as there's often a queue and people often seem to dive left in order to queue jump.

Well, everyone seems to love rhythm games, how about making people switch lanes every now and then? Penalty: 1 point until the next successful change?

To be frank though, I find keeping myself as close to the edge as I dare almost as interesting as looking for cameras/cops as I blast along above the limit. It's only habitual... what, "slowerers"?.... that become robots - but they tend to be anyway.

That looks fucking AWESOME.

When is the rear mounted AAC cannon being mounted?

Right chums, car advice time.

I want to get something small, cheap, and nippy - on the basis that I can then spec it up a bit and get a decent runabout for a decent price. What I like the look of so far:

Ford Fiesta 1.6 Titanium
Pros - Top spec equipment, looks great, comfy.
Cons - Slowest of the three

Citroen C2 1.6 16V VVT
Pros - Cheapest of the three
Cons - Middling speed & equipment

Renaultsport Clio 200
Pros - Goes like stink
Cons - Low spec equipment, punishing ride.

The fact that I'm renting means that I can break my 'no French cars' rule, as I won't be paying to repair anything that breaks. Thoughts and opinions?

Is there no fast version of the Fiesta?
And what about the Mazda 3 MPS? That's idiot fast.

Thanks, buddy. When it's back in London just give me a shout and you can have a drive.

No fast Fiesta, no. Surprised me, too.

The 3 MPS is twice the price of all the others.

For me it will only surpass the 975 banana mark if he puts a red light on the front like KITT. + the swooshing noise, natch. That would indeed be so awesome we'd be looking and scores that could be classed as dangerous.

So just in case, please can you all ensure you have your special safety pants to hand? These were issued when you paid your sub in order to protect you from banana danger.

These's going to be a massive winch on the front. Does that count?

Fiesta eco - cheap fuel and free tax?

There's a fast fiat thing, new punto or whatever, looks quite nice.

Probably because it's also twice the size. The Mazda 2 (Demio) uses the Fiesta platform but there's no fast one of them either. Weird, which is a shame because of those 3 I'd go for the Fiesta every time.

I have a soft spot for the Clio. It's the doner kebab of cars for me; I know I really shouldn't like them, but I really do.

There's the 500 Abarth, the Punto Abarth and best of all, Punto Esseesse. 180bhp from a 1.4? Wooooooosh! But still reasonable economy and tax. Not exactly cheap at nearly £18k list though.

Skoda Fabia RS? No wait, Craster was talking about leasing, and there aren't any new RSes at the moment.

I don't see Craster fitting in a 500. A mate's dad drove an Arbath one though and couldn't say enough nice about the thing.

Heh no, not likely on the 500. I was surprised how roomy the new Fiesta is.

Oooh, cool. I'll hold you to that

I'd drive them all - the thing about speed is you only really need it out on open roads - the big difference will be the chassis and how well they handle. I'd be surprised if you couldn't get Ford to fit a Bluefin chip on that - they seem to do it for all Ford's. I suspect there will be a fast Fiesta sooner rather than later, but the actual car itself has only been out about four months hasn't it?

I think they look great.

Much as I like some Citroens - I think the C6 is beautiful, they do have a slightly iffy rep on reliability and customer care.

That, though, is the advantage of leasing. I don't really need to care much about either of those.

Surely having to return cars regardless of whether you buy or lease is tedious, exacerbated by how well you get treated...

Yeah, but I just call up the lease company and they swap it out. I don't have to deal with the manufacturer.

I can only assume that there's some sort of supercar convention going on near Shrewsbury. In the past week I've seen an Audi R8 (twice, so presumably it's a local boy), a Ferrari 355 (real, not an MR2 replica), a Ferrari 328 GTS and today I saw a Honda NSX and a Lotus Esprit V8.

Got pics of the R8 and the 328, couldn't get any of the others 'cos I was driving at the time. Booo.

Wooo! It's the Canary Wharf Motor Expo! Time to forget about sensible cars and go test drive some mental cars.

Get some photos, man.

Just paid my deposit to have a bit of a blat around Silverstone National Circuit at the start of September. That should be fun.

There is more room in the mazda 2, which we thought odd, as they are very similar...

Excellent. I'll come up and watch, maybe.

My Dad has just bought a Fiesta diesel 1.6 Titanium for his retirement car. It's very nice to drive- I'm quite impressed by it.

He decided to get the 1.6 instead of the 1.3 as it was cheap, and my mum insisted on getting the funky magenta colour - which cost more than it did to upgrade the engine.

Odd. The Expo has all the usual prestige manufacturers, but none of the lower end. No sign of Toyota, Ford, Peugeot, Citroen, Mitsubishi, Honda etc. You'd have thought they'd be all for it in these cash-conscious times.

Still, I've just booked a test drive in/on this!

That's because the lower end is all in a heap of shit so can't justify making prestige stuff but the prestige people don't have anything else to do. That and their customers don't really look at the least-significant 7 digits on their bank balances anyway, so haven't noticed we're all fucked yet.

Normally the Expo has the normal cars though - last year you had a Citroen C1 parked next to the Audi R8 - and it's those cars that are missing.

One for Mimi:



A full-size knitted Ferrari.

Looks good but I've heard the handling is a bit woolly.

Yeah, but that's just knit-picking.

Wouldn't be long before the cops ran a pullover on you either.

I hear they're quite big in Jersey.

Only if they cotton on.

I believe the driving position can make you a bit crochety.

If you had four of them in a convoy, you could be in the last one and be Car D.

Button it.

I am surprised this thread has no contribution from Woolie Ooster.

Says the Sheep shagger.

Well, I've just ordered one of these:

2009 Clio 1.6 GT

I noticed I have two scrappable vehicles that would qualify for that scrapping scheme thing.

But it doesn't seem to be worth doing, as without the usual dealer promotions (which they cunningly remove when you ask for the scrappage deal), you find that the RRP of the car is about £2000 more than you'd otherwise pay.