Be Excellent To Each Other

Crikey, it's gone back up at £250 more than I paid for it!

Tempted?

That front and rear parktronic sounds pretty snazzy.

You should get it. This thread is boring without it.

It's a bit fucking rich proudly touting the "front and rear parktronic" given that he's conspicuously (and frankly, incredibly) failed miserably to get said 'parktronic' to work, even a teensy bit, for 8 months or however long, having had umpteen attempts to do so?

Bloody hell, some people have got a flaming cheek!

It does not state they work!

You've been fairly mugged there H. you've had the car for 9 months and had god knows how many trips back to them to get stuff fixed ( unsuccessfully) and after all that they took it back for over 2 grand less than you paid for it (I can't imagine you did mega mileage given that you live on a postage stamp)... and then have the gall to advertise it for more than you paid for it and with working parktronic...

While also taking another £8K off him for the replacement

It's almost like they are a business that makes their money by trading cars, the cheek of them!

In fairness to the dealer I honestly don't think he knew I'd taken the Merc back so many times. He owns two dealerships, his own 'prestige' dealership which he actively manages and runs day-to-day, and the local Honda dealership which I now get the impression he 'owns' rather than 'runs'. It's the Honda dealership I've been returning the Merc to as they're close to my place of work, it's never actually gone back to the main guy's place since I bought it.

When I told him I'd taken the Merc back ten times and more he looked genuinely shocked and apologised, saying he had no idea and thought it'd all been fixed back in March (which was when I last spoke to him about it). I said I just assumed he'd been in the loop but he said the Honda place only involves him in their affairs if they need to. He said I should never let anything drag on like that, any similar problems in future to call him and he'll get directly involved and sort it out.

Either way he matched the £8K trade-in offer I'd had for the Merc elsewhere, despite it booking at £7650, partly as way of an apology for the trouble I'd had with the Merc, and of course with the known problem with the Parktronic which he's going to have to get fixed. (Who knows, maybe he's managed to get it fixed already.)

£8K for the Merc was a decent trade-in, and £16K for the S4 was a pretty good price, I couldn't find a similarly specced car of the same age and miles on the Autotrader site for less than £16K, and plenty on there that cost more.

The fact he's put the Merc back out at £10750 doesn't irk me at all, everyone knows there's two grand or more between trade and retail on any car, that is after all where they make their profit out of the equation, and it's not like they stick the car straight back out on the forecourt, when I got the Merc for example he'd put four brand new tyres on it. The S4 has had two new tyres, a full service, 12 months warranty, and is in on Monday for a DSG oil change as there was no evidence of it on the service record, so he's paying to get that done - all that comes out of his margin.

As Trooper says, how else is a car dealer going to make money on used cars? They're not charities!

You couldn't find a similarly-specced S4 for the price anywhere else? Wonder what's wrong with it!

Oh don't get me wrong it wasn't 'suspiciously cheap' or anything like that, for example there's an almost identically specced car (and the same colour) on Autotrader for £14.5K (albeit missing ADS which was a £2K+ option), but that's a 110K miler as opposed to the 47K that mine has on it. Also it's a private sale so no dealer support or warranty.

Then there are plenty around the £15.5-£17K mark which are about as well specced and with similar miles (although the ADS seems to be quite a rare option, and I've already grown to really rather like it), the point being that at £16K he wasn't gouging on price, with the advantage that the car was already on the island, on Manx plates and tax, from a local dealer and warrantied from same.

Finding an exact match is rather tricky as there were such a phenomenal range of options offered on the car, so for example there's one at £15.5K that has ADS, but doesn't have the MMI system or B&O audio upgrade, that sort of thing.

Also it's a bit of a ballache to bring a car over yourself as if it's over 3 years old it has to through the notoriously tough Manx test, irrespective of whatever M.O.T. it's got on it from the UK, then you have to re-register it and get Manx tax on it as well.

I'm not saying that nothing will go wrong with the S4, but with a 12 month warranty I'm fairly chilled about it.

Personally, I still think the guy's taking the piss, and I don't even remotely buy the whole "Ooh, really sorry to hear you had to bring the car back 23 times to us, Mr Hearthly, and we still haven't fixed the problem despite promising faithfully we would do so, I really had NO idea about this, honest guv. Bugger me eh? I'm sorry, what was that? Look over there! A squirrel!" nonsense, call me a cynic lol. It's a two bit dealership on a small island that he owns & where every bugger knows everyone else. If that were my business, I'd have bloody well known about it, that's for sure.

It's absolutely taking the piss that he's marked up your trade in by 30%-odd under these circumstances AND sold you ANOTHER (far more expensive) car, at a not-particularly-cheap-price...? I accept that options are a bit limited where you are, but by crikey, that really is rather poor IMO. If it were me, I would've expected any replacement car in the offing at rock bottom Parkers' trade price at the very least, which is to say around £2k less than you paid. Either that, or hello all my diary notes each time the car's failed and I've been in some courtesy car etc.

Sorry Cavey I just can't really get onboard with that analysis of things!

It's not as if my nine months of Merc ownership were some kind of dreadful nightmare. The one serious issue (car going into limp mode due to faulty valve body control unit) was swiftly diagnosed and repaired without any argument or fuss, and I was given a courtesy car for the time the Merc was off the road.

The faulty heated mirror was replaced without complaint.

The Dension being wired in wrong was nothing to do with the dealer and was rectified by the installer at no cost to myself with no fuss.

The one thing that dragged on was the Parktronic, yes I could have kicked off and tried to insist they take it to the franchised dealership and pay whatever it cost to get it sorted properly, but (a) I'm not even sure I'd have had a leg to stand on legally as the dealer was making attempts to fix the problem and (b) Who needs that sort of hostility and conflict over a trivial matter such as wonky parking sensors?

It wasn't any great inconvenience, I just dropped the Merc off at the Honda dealer in the morning (which is very close to where I work), and would then collect it after work, with the latest (unsuccessful ) attempt having been made to fix the Parktronic, and the car having been given a mini-valet on each occasion.

In a list of things that would get me annoyed or make me think someone's taking the piss, it wouldn't even creep into the Top 50.

I did nine months and 8000 miles of very pleasant motoring in the Merc, and was offered above book price on trade-in, for a very reasonably priced S4 that was just the kind of car I wanted with a very nice spec.

I honestly can't see how 'I want two grand off that S4 because you didn't fix my Parktronic properly' is an even vaguely reasonable request.

Maybe he's fibbing about not knowing about the Merc's Parktronic problems dragging on for months, maybe his surprise at the news and subsequent apology was entirely fake, personally I don't think so and that he's being genuine, but ultimately it doesn't really matter anyway as I've got the car I wanted at a price I was happy to pay.

There's a lot of stuff in the world it's worth getting bent out of shape about, my nine months of Merc ownership and Parktronic shenanigans are most certainly not one of those things IMO

Oh, soz, I wasn't suggesting getting pissed off about it; as you say, there are much more important things in life and it's arguable either way. If it's any consolation, I've lost an absolute packet on cars over the years, vastly worse than this.

At the end of the day, if you're happy with the outcome then that's all that matters.

Hello!

Installed the led interior light bulbs in Mrs Zs car tonight.

Gives it a much more modern feel, it'll be sure to turn heads in Aldi car park when we're loading in an evening shop.

I have a weird thing with car inside lights. Never use them, and switch them off so they don't light up the car when I open a door. Having a light then makes me feel exposed (so far not too bad). I put it down to a fear of snipers (hmm, maybe a bit weird).

Did you used to own a 2002 Honda Civic Type R? Because that's what mine are set to, and I have been too lazy to see what I need to do to change it.

Get a Peugeot and get these ridiculous things blaring out of your doors

Bat signal for bell-ends

charitably, one could say it aids the door's visibility so passing vehicles or cyclists are less likely to crash into it. But I don't think it would actually help at all.

They're puddle lights.

My wife's Evoque did this and so does her RR Sport... I'm from Essex, so, if I think it's naff (and I do), then it must be really bad.

Shame the Audi didn't have them, they'd have really worked like the bat signal for you mate.

Holy shit white cars get really dirty, really quickly. I've had it less than a week and it already looks like it's been dragged through a river backwards.

Also, I'm fretting somewhat about the Mechatronic unit going wonky (this is the control unit/brain thing for the DSG transmission). My car is exhibiting none of the symptoms that generally indicate it's going west, but when they go it's a £4000 job, and by all accounts quite a lot of them end up going.

Ah well I have the twelve month warranty I suppose so we'll see how it goes, if it chucks any warnings or starts clonking on the gears, surging, or being reluctant to shift - I shall not be faffing about or getting fobbed off, 'cause that shit means the Mechatronic is on its way out.

In other news water is wet...

Like you'll own it that long...

I believe the current record holder is the Scooby, which was the best part of two years. (Or may have been just over two years, I'll have to go over the archives, just for my own interest really.)

The Merc is definitely one of my more short-lived ownership regimes at nine months.

Off the top of my head I've got through about fifteen cars in sixteen years.

EDIT TO ADD - Fuck me, just quickly jotted down the ones I can remember and the actual tally is 22 cars in 17 years! (I've gone to 17 years as that includes the 'slightly illegal' Vauxhall Cavalier I had 'pre-licence'.)

There may be more, these are the ones I can definitely recall.

---------

1985 Vauxhall Cavalier automatic (sort of doesn't count, bought for £50, had no licence, tax, or insurance. Destroyed with a rock after a mental drinking and gambling bender.)
All cars from here on were after I'd passed my test and legal in all regards.
1989 MKII Golf GTi
1987 MKII Golf CL
1989 Honda Prelude
2001 Honda Accord SE Exec
200x SEAT Ibiza Cupra
1997 Jap import Honda Prelude Type-S
1996 (?) BMW 528i
200x Peugeot 106 1.5 Diesel
200x Ford Mondeo 2.5
1998 (?) Nissan 200SX
1985 Vauxhall Carlton 2.0 GLi ('mortgage car', i.e. fucking skint as just taken on mortgage and was all I could afford)
200x Citreon C5
1985 Renault 5 Turbo (at same time as C5)
2006 (?) Ford Focus C-Max
2002 (?) BMW 325i Cabrio (at same time as C-Max, I think.)
2007 (?) Subaru Impreza STi
2008 Citreon C6
2009 Honda Accord
2008 Honda Civic Type-R
2006 Mercedes CLS 320
2010 Audi S4

Wow, that's a lot.

Mine (since 2000):
1986 Renault 5 TC Rio
1991 Vauxhall Astra L 1.4
2005 Renault Clio Dynamique 1.6
1988 VW Golf GTI 16v
2005 Honda Civic Sport
2005 Renault Clio RS 182
2002 Honda Civic Type R

Since passing my test in about 92...

Fiat Panda 1000CL - 33k miles
Citroen AX 1.0 Debut - 60k miles
Ford Ka3 - 18k miles
Skoda Octavia 1.9 TDI Elegance - 83k miles
Skoda Octavia 2.0 TDI Elegance - 79k miles
Fiat Bravo 1.6 Multijet Dynamic - 72k miles
Skoda Octavia 2.0 TDI Elegance - 35k miles

Lists! Yay!

1998 1.2 Clio
2004 2.0 Hdi Picasso

Yeah, boi!

Oh, I did an upgrade today.

Lists!


199something ford sierra estate 1.8
1999 vauxhall corsa b 1.2
197something ford capri 1.2 lazer
same capri but with 2.9 V6 efi engine (maaad)
unknown year mitsubishi Galant. shitbox.
mazda b2000 ute (I technically still own this but as its the other side of the world rotting in someones garden I think I may have forfeit ownership)
1998 ford escort mk... 5? in cossy blue.
VW golf mk2 small bumper 2 light in grey
1973 Reliant Scimitar se5a
198something Reliant scimitar se6 (bought it for the wolfrace magslots then binned the rest of it.
2002? Maybe earlier than that... toyota mr2 mk2 version2. best car I've ever owned.
200something skoda fabia elegance 1.9tdi booooooring
toyota corolla bug eye. the ugly one.
not got it yet but next up is a fsc zuk, pending a trip to poland.

Edit: somehow forgot the 1969 MGB GT Sebring edition in Gulf blue and orange racing livery

you changed the R to an A?

My list -

Vauxhall Astra. It was red

Hmm.

1997 - J Reg Mini Citi
2000 - B Reg Toyota Carina II
2004 - T Reg Peugeot 306 Rallye
2006 - 55 Reg Mazda 6 TS
2009 - 59 Reg Renault Clio 1.6 GTI

Not many cars!

1976 Mk 1 1.6LS VW Golf (well, approx 70% of one, the rest was holes and rust. £80 deathtrap). Worst car imaginable; I personally watched it get scrapped.
1977 Mk 3 Ford Capri 1.6GL (2.0 'Pinto' transplanted on Day One of ownership, natch, as well as a complete interior and six-clock dash transplant from an "S"). In Apollo Green, with slot alloys and Janspeed 1-box. Still my favorite ever car, more than any of my Porsches, I cried like a baby when I sold her ("Bev")
1985 Mk 2 Vauxhall Astra 1.3GL (the egg-shaped one with self-destruct camshaft)
1983 Mk 3 Ford Capri 1.6LS
1978 Rover SD1 V8 (absolute piece of shit)
1990 Ford Fiesta XR2i (loved it)
1993 Mk 3 Vauxhall Cavalier 1.8GLSi
1992 Mk 3 Vauxhall Astra 1.7TD
1993 Mk 3 Vauxhall Astra 1.8CDi
1997 Peugeot 406 1.8LS
1999 Rover 200 2.0D
2000 Renault ClioSport 172 (loved it)
1997 Mk 1 Renault Laguna 2.0i estate (comfiest cheapo barge ever, loved it in its own way)
2002 Audi TT Mk 1 225-Quattro coupe & 2003 Ford Mondeo 2.0TDCI Ghia X (absolute shite car, massive engine problems that Ford walked away from. At least the Golf only cost £80, this fucking lemon cost £14,000...)
2004 Audi TT Mk 1 V6 convertible
2008 Audi TT Mk 2 3.2i Quattro V6 coupe (good car) & Fiesta 1.4TDCi Style for Mrs C
2007 Mk 1 Cayman S 987.1 (gen 1) - fucking awesome, converted overnight & Mk 6 VW Golf 2.0GTTD for Mrs C (utterly soul-less, handled like a blancmange, not sure where the "GT" bit came in TBH)
2011 Boxster S Black Edition, 987.2 (gen 2 with high compression engine) - giant killer, Top 3 car for me & RR Evoque Tech SD4 for Mrs C (surprisingly a very good car)
2014 Mk 2 Cayman S 981 - you gotta love it, best handling car I've ever driven & RR Sport TDV6 3.0 for Mrs C (ahem, brief Audi A3 1.6TDI Ultra ownership )

Next up: Amarok V6

He put one of these on:

http://www.hotlicksexhaust.com/

Mechatronic > parktronic

23 cars in 12 years for me. Record for shortest ownership period is the BMW 650i that I had for just under two months last year.

Longest is the GT-Four, which in January next year will have been with my for 8 years.

1990 Ford Fiesta 1.1
1997 Seat Ibiza 1.4
1996 Vauxhall Vectra 2.0
2001 Toyota Celica 1.8 VVT-i
2003 Toyota Celica T-Sport 1.8 VVTL-i
1995 Toyota Celica GT-Four 2.0
2001 Ford Ka (brief ownership, was to be used to help Shin learn to drive)
1990 Mazda Eunos Roadster 1.6
2005 BMW 320ci
2004 Toyota Corolla T-Sport 1.8
1997 Toyota MR2 GT-S Turbo 2.0
1999 BMW 735i (bought from Trooper)
1997 Mazda MX-5 Roadster 1.8
2005 BMW M5
1996 Honda Stepwgn
2006 MINI Cooper S Cabriolet
2003 BMW 745i
2007 BMW M5 Touring
2002 Mazda MX-5
2004 BMW M3 Cabriolet
2006 BMW 650i
2007 BMW 750i
2015 Nissan LEAF
And technically a 2008 Skoda Fabia, although that's Jem's car but I bought it for her.

Two months isn't long at all for the 650i, what was the deal with that?

From my list I think the shortest period of ownership (and certainly the least driven) was the 1985 Renault 5 GT Turbo. (I owned this for a brief period of time in 2008.)

For starters it was a second car which was ridiculous as Mrs H can't drive and I only have one arse. But beyond that I hadn't quite realised just how fucking awful 80s cars were. I know people like to get all misty-eyed about some supposed sort of 'better time' for motoring but I call absolute bollocks on the whole concept.

With the lack of any sort of modern comfort or safety features, I felt close to imminent death at all times. Did get it up to 100mph once on the mountain and realised that if anything of any description went even the slightest bit wrong, I was dead.

That was my first and last foray into the realms of 'nostalgic motoring'.

Ford Fiesta
Renault Clio
Peugeot 206
Toyota Yaris
<insert company car ownership of Ford Focus and VW Golf>
Ford Focus
Ford Fiesta

Renault 5 Mk1 - head on crash down a country lane 3 weeks after passing my test
Renault 5 Mk2 - drove this for a few years, good little car
BMW 323i E30 - bought off my brother, it was lowered, dechromed and had a really nice looking body kit etc. - loved this car
Renault 21 TS - bought from the firm I used to work for for cheaps - ripped one of the wheels off
Datsun 160J SSS Coupe - fun old RWD vintage car
Nissan Primera - I honestly can't recall why I bought this, literally no idea what I was thinking
Smart Car - too small really but kind of fun
Smart roadster - so much fun to drive, like a go kart but actually comfortable, shame about the gearbox
Mazda 6 - Just a boring saloon car, nice enough
MX-5 - Loved this thing
BMW 320i E90 - My current car. Needed a family car and I really like it, it's getting on in years now but still feels solid and it reminds me of my beloved old 3 series.

G reg Rover Metro – This was my moms car originally which I was given. It was white. The ladies loved it.
Toyota Corolla – This was the best car ever! I was young and had an awesome looking car with a CD player AND remote central locking that made a pleasing bleep. The first time I took it on a long drive with a load of mates, some women flashed their boobs at us on the motorway. See? Bes t car ever! Also, it had the number plate L387 RTJ which I told everyone stood for Ross Taylor Jnr. It didn’t, but they didn’t know that.

Vauxhall Vetra – This sounded nice but felt like a tank. I barely remember this car apart from changing the CD player in it. It was also green. Swamp green.

Ford Mondeo – My dads ex company car. It was great as my dad had it from brand new and had looked after it. I was sorry to see this go.

A company car. A white clio I think. It was a company car so I didn’t care about it. I did manage to mount some metal railings in Tesco with it once which at the time, was quite scary but funny now I look back.

A Vauxhall Mariva. This is the family car. It does the job and is the only car I’ve bought with my own money fact fans.

Vauxhall Corsa. When I switched jobs and lost the company car, we bought the Mariva and I had the wifes old Corsa. It wasn’t great and the air con didn’t work.

Nissan Cube – My parents old car. It looks odd but it came at the right price and it’s spacious inside. It also has LEDs in it…. Pointless.

My car list....

Vauxhall Astra Mk1 1.2 - Pale Blue
Vauxhall Astra Mk 2 - Dark Blue Estate
Vauxhall Astra Mk1 1.3 - Gold
B Reg - Vauxhall Cavalier CD - Big old Company car
Nissan Micra - a shed used for a few months until I moved to Leeds and did not need a car for 12 months.
L Reg - Peugeot 306 - Red
N Reg - Vauxhall Vectra MK1 (the first one after the Cavalier)
R Reg - Peugeot 306 D-Turbo Loved this car.

Company Cars
Vauxhall Vectra - Bamboo Green - Boring as Hell
Vauxhall Vectra Estate - Black - Face lift one - Looked like a hearse.
VW Golf GT Mk6 - Red
VW Golf GT Mk7 - Black

Some really interesting car histories here, I'm liking some of 'em a lot (and some not so much )

Mark's Datsun 160J takes the top spot for me.

Closely followed by my Toyota Corolla, right? It was awesome.

Fair play Vision for getting a boobflash in an L-reg Toyota Corolla says I. That's the automotive equivalent of a David v Goliath victory