Be Excellent To Each Other

Hello Spec-Chums. Have you or someone you know had to come out of the closet? Why not share your experiences? Write in and tell us.

(off-topic request for seriousness, hidden for neatness and that)

edit: many thanks.

To answer your question: No. But one of me bestest friends is bisexual - but she'd already told her family and that before I met her. May I be of more assistance?

No worries. For future reference (everybody) all you'll need is the pipe-smoker as an icon.

I had a friend who came out while she was at university. Her mother wouldn't accept it, and wouldn't let her tell her 14 year-old sister. It wasn't a good situation.

Still, she's getting married next year. To the guy that was her girlfriends flat-mate

Oh. Er. Well, as far as I'm concerned, anyway.

'fraid I can't really help you there. Although I have a couple of gay friends, they were fully out of the closet aforehand. Both are blessed with a supportive network of friends, fortunately. I don't know as to how their parents reacted though, as they have not volunteered the information.

I'm trying to come up with something penetrating and incisive to say, but I have a very boring coworker talking at me in a way which requires monosyllabic question responses. Tchaw.

So my first year at uni was spent with 3 fucking psychopaths and one really nice gay guy.

I came back from the pub in maybe the second or third week, to find the most homophobic of my flat had ripped the toilet seat of the toilet, and was smashing at the gay guys door shouting for the "faggot to come out here!" Whilst the other two flat mates laughed.

I threw the fuckwit out of the flat, and he left the following day.

That year made me realise just quite how fucking hard being gay can be, and means that although it can be heavy handed, I'm really, really happy the RTD has "his gay agenda." Things like midnight (where the possessed woman just happened, incidentally to be gay) and then it wasn't mentioned, is more important than big gay storylines (IMO).

My gay friend, hadn't come out to his parents (despite being incredibly camp around them), and it was shit like the toilet seat incident that scared him away from doing it. His only experience of being gay was it "being a massive deal," when most people not caring at uni - made him feel a lot better.

My friend also has very supportive family and friends, so to the best of my knowledge it's never actually been a huge issue. It does mean that she has quite a lot of gay friends, which meant at Uni I got chatted up once or twice by some chaps, which I continue to find oddly flattering despite not being in the slightest bit gay myself.

Loads of my friends 'came out' but it was no shock to anyone. My very very very good friend 'J' told me he was gay when he was about 16 and I 14, and he told a handful of people, but we all 'knew'. He asked why, if we knew, we never just said so to him, and I guess we all just figured he'd say so when he was ready. He never 'came out' to his parents as such, he just stated seeing a lot of his good friend 'W', then seeing W every day, then W started staying over and everything was just accepted. This was more or less the way with most of my gay friends.

(Hi, thanks everyone, I'm just sitting back quietly and allowing for some time to pass and posts to be made. I truly appreciate this, ta)

Like Mimi, everyone I know just sort of slowly slid out, to fairly little fan fair or drama. However, as sinister agent's friend has shown, this isn't everyones experience.

I wonder how many gay people would rather be straight - not due to any sexual reason, just the massively larger amount of hassle homosexuals seem to have to put up with. it;s certainly easier being straight.

Oddly, given the fairly open-minded nature of most of my friends, and the frequency with which people will start telling me lots of highly personal stuff with no apparent qualms, I know only two people who are openly gay, and both were when I met them. And one I don't even know very well, although he is a thoroughly nice bloke.

I don't really have much to say on that score, as a result. Sorry.

It ain't easy being a queen.

Sorry. Couldn't resist.

I don't even know any, closeted or otherwise - how boring of me

Well, you might know some closeted ones.

that sounded like you were talking about yourself grim...

well it did in my head.

Don't tell the wife.

And suddenly, Beardy Beer Club took on a whole new meaning.

All the gay chaps I've known were already out when I met them.

And there was one in my class in high school who, after breaking up with his gf, became gay. Which always struck me as kind of odd, as she was quite fit and apparently put out on demand.

All the gay/bi friends I have "came out" in a very unnoticeable, transitional way. No real fuss by them or anybody else. Usually along the lines of drunkenly snogging a person of same sex for a laff, then getting more involved, with things progressing from there. None of my mates are the types to make any kinda deal out of these things, which is good. One friend of mine has a father who recently found God, and now strictly rejects his sons bisexuality, even though he was fine with it before he got all religious. That's rather a shit situation, but my friend just cut his father out of his life, as he wants none of that crap around him.