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Pants down?
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Author:  WTB [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:02 ]
Post subject:  Pants down?

'ning!

I've taken the day off work because there's a chap coming along to fit a hardwood floor in our living room. Currently, the floor is stripped to the tiling, which is covered in what is presumably Bitumen. I say presumably because that's what the floor fitter just told me, and it made sense to me for it to be Bitumen, because it looks like Bitumen. Anyway, floor fitter says *breathes in through teeth*, "if I fit the floor to the Bitumen, it's going to come up after a few months". He then demonstrated on the wood floor in the hallway, which to be fair, has came up a bit and "bounces" in certain parts.

So now he's saying they need to nail plywood down and fit the hardwood on top of that. This makes perfect sense to me, but I still feel like he may be tickling my bumhole with his bellend. Anybody got any thoughts on this? He's now fucked off to "get a price for the plywood", which smells strongly of "I've got another job to do for an hour". Also, my mother is going to be devastated when she gets back from work to find her Bitumen lined front room still there.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:08 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

I distrust all tradesmen, but put it this way, plywood is so fucking cheap that he could easily estimate a price and not lose out by more than a fiver if he was wrong. Bloody tradesmen.

Anyway, as I sit here I'm waiting for the carpet clearner to turn up. I just had to ring him as he said he'd be here at 9am. Cheerfully he picked up and said he was on his way now, but the guy that was going to help him today has 'let him down'. So now I hope the guy bloody turns up and is able to get the job done in time by himself, or I'll be right miffed. £115 cocking quid to get the carpets cleaned. Grrhggrhgrg.

Author:  WTB [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:11 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

I knew it! My reckoning is he came, saw it was quite an easy job (it's a fairly square room with a fireplace to navigate), and fucked off to do some other stuff first.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Here's a fun experiment - measure the room to be plyed out, and then ring a local timber merchant and ask for a quote for that much ply. Keep it in your hand and compare it to what the tradesman says when he comes back. If the prices are wildly different, challenge him on it. Then stab him in the face with a knife*.



* Optional.

Author:  Bobbyaro [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

http://faq.woodyoulike.co.uk/2008/06/floor-preparati.html

Sounds like he may be correct.

Quote:
well the Brand is Elka solid, and I got them for a good price, it states to glue to the floor or secret, over floor boards.

FROM HERE, THIRD POST DOWN. oops caps lock.

Author:  Pod [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:17 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Get someone else to do it in the meantime.

Author:  Plissken [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:32 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

He's right about it not sticking to the bitumen. We had the same problem in our front room.

Author:  Pod [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:36 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Yuo had the same trademan?

Author:  Dudley [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:48 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

ComicalGnomes wrote:
I distrust all tradesmen, but put it this way, plywood is so fucking cheap that he could easily estimate a price and not lose out by more than a fiver if he was wrong. Bloody tradesmen.

Anyway, as I sit here I'm waiting for the carpet clearner to turn up. I just had to ring him as he said he'd be here at 9am. Cheerfully he picked up and said he was on his way now, but the guy that was going to help him today has 'let him down'. So now I hope the guy bloody turns up and is able to get the job done in time by himself, or I'll be right miffed. £115 cocking quid to get the carpets cleaned. Grrhggrhgrg.


That's the way to save money!

Author:  Plissken [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 11:16 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Pod wrote:
Yuo had the same trademan?


If Jonarob has got my father in law to put his flooring down, I'm going to be Asking Questions.



That's the first time I've ever referred to him as my father in law.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 11:43 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Dudley wrote:
That's the way to save money!

My carpets are filthy.

Author:  Dudley [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:07 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Then there's good nutrition in there man!

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 13:05 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

He's still busy cleaning, and appears to be doing a reasonable job. He is, however, wearing a cap which means we can never be friends.

Author:  Bobbyaro [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 13:13 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Tell me its a flat cap! Is he beating the carpets clean? I have a really cool Victorianista* image in my head.

*may not be a word.

Author:  CUS [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 13:18 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Bobbyaro wrote:
Tell me its a flat cap! Is he beating the carpets clean? I have a really cool nothern image in my head.

Specifically Zardoz-FTFY.

Author:  BikNorton [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 13:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Bobbyaro wrote:
Tell me its a flat cap!
I was thinking of an entirely different sort of cap, and wondering why a man would wear one.

Also why CG needs to impregnate people before they can be friends.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 13:44 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Now you mention it, it does make sense to pick friends only if they're willing to have sex with you. That way you're assured of a quickie if you ever feel the urge. Interesting. Obviously it would make it difficult to make male friends, depending on how much you're inclined that way.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 14:32 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

The carpet man has finished. I wouldn't say my carpets are like new, but they're better than they were. There were a few spots that he couldn't get out. Gutted.

Anyway, long story short I'm now £115 lighter and off to Sainsburys.

Author:  Grim... [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 14:35 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Keep/scan the receipt!

Author:  CUS [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 14:37 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

You're shopping at Sainsburys still?

Jeez. You mean Aldi, Lidl or Netto really, right?

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Tue Jul 01, 2008 14:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: Pants down?

Way ahead of you dude, I'm seperating food from non-food into seperate transactions, for maximum clarity.

I've also just put vanish stain remover on the couple of spots the carpet man couldn't clean. If I come back and manage to get the stains out, I might have to hunt him down and remove his legs. Back later!

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