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Bits and Bobs 50
https://www.beexcellenttoeachother.com:443/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=11218
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Author:  Grim... [ Mon Dec 02, 2019 22:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Trooper wrote:
I had the music on while I was walking home today, started walking in time with the beat, then when the song stopped I'd forgotten how fast I normaly walk, and had to stop and start again to reset.

I find Teenagers by My Chemical Romance exactly matches my walking speed.

Author:  Pundabaya [ Tue Dec 03, 2019 10:50 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Never try walking with Tool playing. Walking in the weird time signatures they use is often confusing.

Author:  Satsuma [ Tue Dec 03, 2019 13:53 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Just discovered that the awesome jam that was Yub Nub was cut from Return of the Jedi in the Blu-ray release. Dicks.

And they CG’ed out Darth Vader’s eyebrows.

Author:  DavPaz [ Tue Dec 03, 2019 21:15 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

My daughter just made me a cup of tea. Parenting is starting to pay off!

Author:  Mr Chonks [ Tue Dec 03, 2019 21:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

DavPaz wrote:
My daughter just made me a cup of tea. Parenting is starting to pay off!

Was it any good though? I’m betting not

Author:  DavPaz [ Tue Dec 03, 2019 21:48 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Mr Chonks wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
My daughter just made me a cup of tea. Parenting is starting to pay off!

Was it any good though? I’m betting not

A tad milky. Otherwise acceptable. I've had worse at work

Author:  zaphod79 [ Wed Dec 04, 2019 16:35 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

From Chinny

https://twitter.com/chinnyhill10/status ... 9927193603




Quote:
I have fallen down the rabbit hole of one of the most vital web pages I have ever come across. The Chairs Of Blakes 7.


https://watchingblakes7.wordpress.com/2 ... -blakes-7/

(the whole website is worth reading if you are a B7 fan)

Author:  Warhead [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 7:41 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.

Author:  Trooper [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 8:42 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

Author:  Warhead [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 14:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Trooper wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

I suspect the problem is with the nut on the toilet seat.

Author:  krazywookie [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 14:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

I suspect the problem is with the nut on the toilet seat.

The fix is to nut into a sock in future.

Author:  Warhead [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 15:02 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

krazywookie wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

I suspect the problem is with the nut on the toilet seat.

The fix is to nut into a sock in future.

Nah mate, man size tissues with balsom to prevent unpleasant chafing.

Author:  krazywookie [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 15:05 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Warhead wrote:
krazywookie wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

I suspect the problem is with the nut on the toilet seat.

The fix is to nut into a sock in future.

Nah mate, man size tissues with balsom to prevent unpleasant chafing.

I prefer a hand woven silk cravat, but each to their own.

Author:  Warhead [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 15:13 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

krazywookie wrote:
Warhead wrote:
krazywookie wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Warhead wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Sorry, I meant a music.

In other news, my toilet paper is faulty.

Please define the fault clearly and concisely.


1,1,1,2...repeat

I suspect the problem is with the nut on the toilet seat.

The fix is to nut into a sock in future.

Nah mate, man size tissues with balsom to prevent unpleasant chafing.

I prefer a hand woven silk cravat, but each to their own.

Only as a special treat.

Author:  Warhead [ Thu Dec 05, 2019 15:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

My favourite @fesshole posting today, "My lazy boyfriend never helps out when we get our shopping delivered. So when he's in the other room on the PS4, I flash my tits to the delivery driver. Every time."

Author:  Warhead [ Sat Dec 07, 2019 13:27 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Warhead wrote:
My favourite @fesshole posting today, "My lazy boyfriend never helps out when we get our shopping delivered. So when he's in the other room on the PS4, I flash my tits to the delivery driver. Every time."

And today's is "For some reason I've started shouting 'THE AYES HAVE IT' in the style of the Speaker of the House when I ejaculate."

Author:  Trooper [ Tue Dec 10, 2019 21:54 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

My thermostat battery died today, I came home to a flat that was 32C and the boiler was still on full whack.

It's a bit warm in here....

Author:  Cras [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 2:02 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Christ. Mine is set to 16 and it's sometimes too hot.

Author:  Trooper [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 8:43 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

I usually have it set to either 18 or 21 depending on the time of day.

Author:  ApplePieOfDestiny [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 8:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Our cleaners will frequently “polish” our nest and we’ll return home to find it on some ludicrously high or low temperature.

Author:  DavPaz [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 9:00 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Is this the First World Problems thread?

Author:  Grim... [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 9:25 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

I like that Riles has such a huge house that it requires more than one cleaner.

Author:  Findus Fop [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 10:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Grim... wrote:
I like that Riles has such a huge house that it requires more than one cleaner.


And that he refers to his home as his nest. So kooky.

Author:  Cras [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 10:35 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

That's actually what he calls his penis.

Author:  Jem [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 13:30 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Our thermostat occasionally gets stuck at full whack for no apparent reason, and it's always when we're out or asleep so we end up using a fuckton of gas for hours on end. :roll:

Author:  Cras [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 14:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Thermostat is what Jem calls Gaz's penis.

Author:  Findus Fop [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 14:44 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Ah I was getting confused there. I thought it was fuckton.

Author:  Jem [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 16:34 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Cras wrote:
Thermostat is what Jem calls Gaz's penis.


I wish Gaz's penis got stuck on full whack. :DD

Author:  DavPaz [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 16:45 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Any more than 4 hours and you're supposed to call the doctor

Author:  GazChap [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 17:03 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Cras wrote:
Thermostat is what Jem calls Gaz's penis.

Well, it is depressingly old and has a mind of it's own.

Author:  Mr Russell [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 17:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

GazChap wrote:
Cras wrote:
Thermostat is what Jem calls Gaz's penis.

Well, it is depressingly old and has a mind of it's own.

And your Dad moans when you touch it.

Author:  Mimi [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 18:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Wait, what?

Author:  Mr Russell [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 19:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Mimi wrote:
Wait, what?

Thermostat. Don’t adjust the temperature

Author:  Mimi [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 19:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Was going to make a joke about the privilege of growing up with heating and a dad as I had neither, but realised it was grim...

Author:  DavPaz [ Wed Dec 11, 2019 20:13 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Mimi wrote:
Was going to make a joke about the privilege of growing up with heating and a dad as I had neither, but realised it was grim...

Grim...'s your dad?

Author:  Findus Fop [ Thu Dec 12, 2019 9:46 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Findus Fop wrote:
This is a wonderful thread about, among other things, the importance of tea:

https://twitter.com/garius/status/1190244042665271296?s=09


He's at it again, making me sob at my desk. This time on the topic of the Underground, loss, and kindness.

https://twitter.com/garius/status/1204795961731629058

Author:  Grim... [ Thu Dec 12, 2019 9:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

DavPaz wrote:
Mimi wrote:
Was going to make a joke about the privilege of growing up with heating and a dad as I had neither, but realised it was grim...

Grim...'s your dad?

Such a fucking disappointment.

Author:  Nik [ Thu Dec 12, 2019 10:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Grim... wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
Mimi wrote:
Was going to make a joke about the privilege of growing up with heating and a dad as I had neither, but realised it was grim...

Grim...'s your dad?

Such a fucking disappointment.

Harsh! If my daughter turns out anything like Mimi, I'll be absolutely delighted! :)

Author:  Kern [ Thu Dec 12, 2019 10:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

This plot twist is up there with the Star Wars one.

Author:  Zardoz [ Thu Dec 12, 2019 13:18 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Kern wrote:
This plot twist is up there with the Star Wars one.

"...as if millions of thermostats suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly turned up to full. I fear something terrible has happened."

Author:  DavPaz [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 11:09 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Due to tonight's Xmas drinking, I'm going to work on the train and bus this morning. It feels tonally apt to be on a miserable, windswept, drizzly kerbside waiting for a piss-smelling bus. Don't know how I managed to do this for so long

Author:  Trooper [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 11:12 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

I took a bus for first time in ages this week. It also smelt of piss, who are these people pissing on buses?

Author:  DavPaz [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 11:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Trooper wrote:
I took a bus for first time in ages this week. It also smelt of piss, who are these people pissing on buses?

Tories. Probably

Author:  MaliA [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 11:46 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

DavPaz wrote:
Due to tonight's Xmas drinking, I'm going to work on the train and bus this morning. It feels tonally apt to be on a miserable, windswept, drizzly kerbside waiting for a piss-smelling bus. Don't know how I managed to do this for so long


I'm out in town tonight.

Author:  Trooper [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 11:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

MaliA wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
Due to tonight's Xmas drinking, I'm going to work on the train and bus this morning. It feels tonally apt to be on a miserable, windswept, drizzly kerbside waiting for a piss-smelling bus. Don't know how I managed to do this for so long


I'm out in town tonight.


Where are you planning to piss?

Author:  DavPaz [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:00 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

MaliA wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
Due to tonight's Xmas drinking, I'm going to work on the train and bus this morning. It feels tonally apt to be on a miserable, windswept, drizzly kerbside waiting for a piss-smelling bus. Don't know how I managed to do this for so long


I'm out in town tonight.

Where are you drinking?

Author:  MaliA [ Fri Dec 13, 2019 12:04 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

DavPaz wrote:
MaliA wrote:
DavPaz wrote:
Due to tonight's Xmas drinking, I'm going to work on the train and bus this morning. It feels tonally apt to be on a miserable, windswept, drizzly kerbside waiting for a piss-smelling bus. Don't know how I managed to do this for so long


I'm out in town tonight.

Where are you drinking?


Tops off down Matthew street la

Author:  Warhead [ Wed Dec 18, 2019 13:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Today's @fesshole confession that made me giggle.

I used to regularly dial into important meetings at a big four bank in a high pitched voice as 'Hitler' so the system would say 'Hitler...has joined the conference'. As soon as someone said 'sorry, who has joined?' I would leave, so it said 'Hitler...has left the conference"

Author:  MaliA [ Fri Dec 20, 2019 11:37 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

Happy birthday mimi!

Author:  Nik [ Fri Dec 20, 2019 12:11 ]
Post subject:  Re: Bits and Bobs 50

MaliA wrote:
Happy birthday mimi!

:this:

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