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Crikey.

Funny how chicks you used to go out clubbing with, drop a couple of kids, realise that they need to make ends meet, and forget to mention it

EDIT: NSFW
yeah but she is hell on toast, so dont feel too bad you didnt see the pics sooner.
MaliA wrote:
Crikey.

Funny how chicks you used to go out clubbing with, drop a couple of kids, realise that they need to make ends meet, and forget to mention it



ARRRGHHHH!!! MY EYES!!!!!!!!

That's almost as bad as when someone posted those nudey pictures of Lauren Harries* on Popbitch (shudders at memory). Probably should have been flagged as NSFW.


* The person who used to be that fake child antiques valuer in the 80's but had a sex change recently.
Nothing says 'intelligence' and 'ambition' more to me than... getting your tits out for a living. Worse still if you're a glamour wannabe.
She's got a terrible case of Gillen Mouth.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
Nothing says 'intelligence' and 'ambition' more to me than... getting your tits out for a living. Worse still if you're a glamour wannabe.


If you do well at it, you can retire in your 20s or mid 30s and live comfortably for the rest of your life without ever having to do more than take a little part time job on. All for simply standing around and being female.

'course, it's hellishly competitive, so the odds of pulling it off aren't great, but I can think of far stupider and more harmful, useless ambitions.
The first eight pages of that site contain no-one even close to being glamour model standard. And most modern glamour models are slightly deformed anyway. With some notable exceptions, such as Ella Cole:

http://www.samanthabond.net/5_Female.html?profile=40

(I just saved the thread!)
sinister agent wrote:
All for simply standing around and being female.

Therein lies the problem, just because you were blessed with good boobs (and don't get me wrong, I like boobs) shouldn't mean you get to make a living out of it. All you seem to need is willingness, which doesn't seem right somehow.

On the other hand, I watched a very amusing show last night ('The Clinic' on Sky Real Lives, fact fans) about some pug-faced minger who decided that, 2 years after having a kid she wanted to go into glamour modelling. Unfortunately, her boobs post-baby were flat and wonky. So, she took out an £x-thousand loan for the surgery with no way of paying it back, wagering that she's be able to pay it off with the glamour jobs she'd get afterwards.

She ignored the surgeon's advice to her her nipples re-aligned (because they were pointing at the floor) and ended up with massive fake-looking implants and wonky nips. That section of the show concluded by her going to a glamour shoot and the photographer saying 'Yeah, well, I wouldn't say she has much chance at high-end glamour stuff. Maybe the cheap stuff, she isn't that good'.

Naturally I was all like LOLZ NOOB SKATES etc. at this comedically predictable outcome. I'm a right bastard, me.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
sinister agent wrote:
All for simply standing around and being female.

Therein lies the problem, just because you were blessed with good boobs (and don't get me wrong, I like boobs) shouldn't mean you get to make a living out of it.


Why not?

"Just because I was blessed with patience, shouldn't mean I get to make a living out of putting up with fuckwits."

"Just because Bill Gates was blessed with business sense, shouldn't mean he gets to make a living out of running a business."

"Just because Ronaldindo was blessed with physical fitness, shouldn't mean he gets to make a living out of sport."

"Just because Picasso was blessed with artistic talent, shouldn't mean he etc."
Goatboy wrote:
With some notable exceptions, such as Ella Cole:

http://www.samanthabond.net/5_Female.html?profile=40

(I just saved the thread!)


Huge forehead, punched-in-lips appearance. I'd call that pretty deformed.
All of the above examples require skill, training and practice. 'Getting your boobs out', does not.
Hey, undoing those buttons can be tricky.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
All of the above examples require skill, training and practice. 'Getting your boobs out', does not.


It does if you want to look good doing it. Ever seen an inexperienced model? They're generally rubbish.
Can't imagine it takes long to pick up, mind, nyn.
nynfortoo wrote:
ComicalGnomes wrote:
All of the above examples require skill, training and practice. 'Getting your boobs out', does not.


It does if you want to look good doing it. Ever seen an inexperienced model? They're generally rubbish.


I love the story of the Barbarian 2 shoot where apparantly the breast plates on Maria Whittaker's top kept on popping off, Carry On Camping Style. Apparantly the guys from Palace had to keep on fixing her up with a pair of pliars. A hard days work if ever I saw one.
Mr Chris wrote:
Can't imagine it takes long to pick up, mind, nyn.


Perhaps not — I've never tried. I find it difficult not to look a mong on camera, though, so it's certainly above me. And my tits are rubbish.
chinnyhill10 wrote:
I love the story of the Barbarian 2 shoot where apparantly the breast plates on Maria Whittaker's top kept on popping off, Carry On Camping Style. Apparantly the guys from Palace had to keep on fixing her up with a pair of pliars. A hard days work if ever I saw one.


I'm not surprised they kept popping off, looking at a pic of her!
Mr Chris wrote:
Can't imagine it takes long to pick up, mind, nyn.


Well, if you look on Facebook, all it seems you need to do is tilt your head sideways like a hound inquiring about the availability of the Rich Tea biscuit in your hand.

But hey, what do I know. I find Kate Moss staggeringly dull looking, Naomi Campbell average looking and have an overpowering need to punch the smug looking one from the M&S adverts in the face. Repeatedly. It's Jimmy Carr in a frock.
Plissken wrote:
I find Kate Moss staggeringly dull looking,

:this: No boobs to speak of, and a stupid face, with stupid teeth. Generally all round :spew: if you ask me.
Kate Moss has the figure of a small boy. You find her attractive = you like small boys.
I like small boobs, but Moss has none. At all. I really can't understand why she's so famous.

EDIT - OBVIOUSLY I'm not suggesting that fame-worthiness depends entirely on the acceptability to me of your boobs. Obviously.
Plissken wrote:
...and have an overpowering need to punch the smug looking one from the M&S adverts in the face. Repeatedly. It's Jimmy Carr in a frock.


Which is the smug one? I can only remember Twiggy whatserface.
ComicalGnomes wrote:
All of the above examples require skill, training and practice. 'Getting your boobs out', does not.


Skill in the sense of talent it most certainly does. Training it DEFINITELY does in the sense of work to maintain that figure.

Quote:
Can't imagine it takes long to pick up, mind, nyn.


Well you have to remember they're not that bright ;)
Mr Chris wrote:
I like small boobs


8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) 8) Wow.

That's amazalating to me.
nynfortoo wrote:
Plissken wrote:
...and have an overpowering need to punch the smug looking one from the M&S adverts in the face. Repeatedly. It's Jimmy Carr in a frock.


Which is the smug one? I can only remember Twiggy whatserface.

One of the French ones. Noone better be dissing Mylene Klass, mind.
Dudley wrote:
Skill in the sense of talent it most certainly does. Training it DEFINITELY does in the sense of work to maintain that figure.

In my experience (of looking at naked boobs) you don't need to be toned, just sufficiently thin, and not stick-thin either.
Someone should tell your mum that BWAHAHAHAHA etc.
Mr Chris wrote:
nynfortoo wrote:
Plissken wrote:
...and have an overpowering need to punch the smug looking one from the M&S adverts in the face. Repeatedly. It's Jimmy Carr in a frock.


Which is the smug one? I can only remember Twiggy whatserface.


A quick Google Image search for "smug cow" reveals she is called Erin O'Connor.
The girl in the OP has both good and bad. GOOD: Nice, meaty, pink nipples. BAD: Lopsided tits.
Plissken wrote:
Mr Chris wrote:
nynfortoo wrote:
Plissken wrote:
...and have an overpowering need to punch the smug looking one from the M&S adverts in the face. Repeatedly. It's Jimmy Carr in a frock.


Which is the smug one? I can only remember Twiggy whatserface.


A quick Google Image search for "smug cow" reveals she is called Erin O'Connor.


Top-right?

Image
"meaty nipples"?
Yep, that's her nyn. I really hate her. She's all gangly and irritating and is just so..... SMUG. I HATE HER.
Mr Chris wrote:
Yep, that's her nyn. I really hate her. She's all gangly and irritating and is just so..... SMUG. I HATE HER.


I think I prefer Banderas over her.
Indeed, top right.

What is it with models either looking smug or bored?

"Oh, I had to get up out of bed and be paid £5000 to wear some clothes. Isn't life terrible."
Plissken obviously hasn't had to suffer [INSERT COUNTRY HERE]'s Next Top Model. Insufferable arses, the lot of them.
Dimrill wrote:
Plissken obviously hasn't had to suffer [INSERT COUNTRY HERE]'s Next Top Model. Insufferable arses, the lot of them.


I rather like America's Next Top Model. The British version is the worst thing ever, though.
Indeed I haven't.

Come to think of it, I've watched five minutes of telly in the last two weeks.
Are they, or are they not, insufferable arses though? To me they are. It irritates me that when they travel to different countries they pretend to be cultured. Superficial shitbags the lot of them. "Product" my arse y cunts ARGH!
The gf watches it occasionally for the amusement factor, rather than a bonafide interest in fashion or modelling. Personally the show makes me angry, but then lots of things do. Tara *fucking * Banks annoys me though, I could happily interface her head with a sledgehammer.
Plissken wrote:
"Oh, I had to get up out of bed and be paid £5000 to wear some clothes. Isn't life terrible."


I'd be insulted* if people were offering me money to put my clothes on.


*insulted but rich
It amazes me that they think what they're doing is important in any way.
Dimrill wrote:
Are they, or are they not, insufferable arses though? To me they are. It irritates me that when they travel to different countries they pretend to be cultured. Superficial shitbags the lot of them. "Product" my arse y cunts ARGH!


I think the American lot are normally a mixed bag. Some of them are utterly insufferable, but others are okay. In the last series I saw I seem to remember really hating Bianca, but thinking Heather was great. For example.

I'm not going to comment on the British lot. The British version doesn't even seem to be a show about training the girls in modelling as job/profession. It's a Big Brother-style reality humiliation-fest, with the occasional taking of photos thrown in.

Also, Tyra Banks is aceness.
Dimrill wrote:
It amazes me that they think what they're doing is important in any way.


You could say that about most jobs.

ComicalGnomes wrote:
All of the above examples require skill, training and practice. 'Getting your boobs out', does not.


Plenty of people are born (or raised very early) with innate talents and skills and attributes like intelligence or strength that they did nothing to earn. Why should people who are naturally fit, clever or ruthless get to cash in on those attributes, and not people who are photogenic?
sinister agent wrote:
Dimrill wrote:
It amazes me that they think what they're doing is important in any way.

You could say that about most jobs.

Yup. Mine, certainly. At least some people enjoy going to fashion shows to watch - you could compare them to footballers in that sense.
Good points, but I know my job is worthless and don't have delusions of grandeur.
Dimrill wrote:
Good points, but I know my job is worthless and don't have delusions of grandeur.


Being Dimrill is a noble calling, you ungrateful git.
Dimrill wrote:
I ... don't have delusions of grandeur.
GLORIOUS DIMRILL
Dimrill sounds like Rimdrill.
Grim... wrote:
Dimrill sounds like Rimdrill.


I'm not surprised you thought of that. You donkey sanctuary owner, you.
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