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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 12:36 
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Curiosity wrote:
I recall Heston's ones from Waitrose being lovely.

Really? I thought they were terrible, far too much pastry, not enough mince, and they tasted of toilet duck when sprinkled with the pine fresh toilet cleanser.

A trap a number of mince pie makers fall into with their higher quality versions is to use low sugar mince meat which has aged, so is very vinegary. Also Waitrose use far too much pastry.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 12:41 
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This is getting deep. Deeper than a deep-filled mince pie.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 12:42 
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Mince Pies?

Fuck that.

Mince and Onion Pies! :metul:

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 13:02 
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Zardoz wrote:
Mince Pies?

Fuck that.

Mince and Onion Pies! :metul:

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Start your own bloody thread then.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 13:13 
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Nah.

About time this was derailed.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 13:48 
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Bobbyaro wrote:
A trap a number of mince pie makers fall into with their higher quality versions is to use low sugar mince meat which has aged, so is very vinegary.
And you know what works well with that? Fat. Ice cream, double cream, brandy butter, clotted cream.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 13:54 
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BikNorton wrote:
Bobbyaro wrote:
A trap a number of mince pie makers fall into with their higher quality versions is to use low sugar mince meat which has aged, so is very vinegary.
And you know what works well with that? Fat. Ice cream, double cream, brandy butter, clotted cream.


And also what works well? Heat.

Oh, your list? Yes, Yes, No, Yes.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 05, 2012 13:54 
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BikNorton wrote:
Bobbyaro wrote:
A trap a number of mince pie makers fall into with their higher quality versions is to use low sugar mince meat which has aged, so is very vinegary.
And you know what works well with that? Fat. Ice cream, double cream, brandy butter, clotted cream.

Onion gravy.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 22:10 
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Sainsbury's in-store bakery ones are usually pretty awesome.

They're quite wide and thus shallow, made from nice shortcrust pastry, and have granulated sugar liberally sprinkled on the (hard) top. The mincemeat is nice but ordinary - none of that "luxury" rubbish.

I haven't seen any this year yet, though - fingers crossed they don't "improve" / recession-ise them!


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Sep 06, 2012 22:37 
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None in tesco yet :(


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 16:25 
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Sainsbury's bog standard deep fill mince pies. On offer for 82p.
Review to follow tonight :D


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 18:07 
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Sainsbury's deep fill mince pies.

Presentation : bog standard mince pie, nothing to write home about.
Taste : pretty good, could do with a bit more sugar as the pastry was slightly bland, filling taste was good but also a bit bland.
Filling : very full, top marks.
Size : standard small size
Value : bargain!

Rating : 7/10


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 19:48 
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7/10 for bland pastry and bland filling? Doesn't leave too much room for improvement. :P

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 19:56 
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What this review tells us is that trooper is cheap.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 20:11 
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Extra points were given for the very full filling and bargainous price! Plus I did say it tasted pretty good, just a bit bland.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 20:12 
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We need a formula:

MP=F(0.8P)(1/Pr)(0.5S)
Where
F = filling taste out of 10
P = Pastry taste out of 10
Pr = the price of an individual pie in pence
S = is weight of an individual pie in grams.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 20:39 
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I think I'll remark, 20 points for each category, giving a mark out of 100.

Sainsbury's deep fill mince pie

P : 10
T : 13
F : 18
S : 10
V : 17

Total : 68/100


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 21:06 
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I gave you a formula and everything! :(

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Sep 17, 2012 21:07 
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Yeah. It was rubbish.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2012 21:36 
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So we went from 7/10 to 68%.
Thanks for that, Trooper.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2012 21:56 
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Value should be cost, surely? The value is determined by the cost, when viewed in light of all the other scoring criteria.

I saw two versions of Co-op mince pies in the shop yesterday, I was extremely tempted to buy a box of each but I'm going to hold off for at least another two months.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2012 22:31 
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Grim... wrote:
So we went from 7/10 to 68%.
Thanks for that, Trooper.


Indeed. It's almost as if the original questioning of the 7/10 mark proved to be unfounded.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Tue Sep 18, 2012 22:34 
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flis wrote:
Value should be cost, surely? The value is determined by the cost, when viewed in light of all the other scoring criteria.


But that would ruin my easy to remember mnemonic. Pretty Transvestites Fornicate Squelchy Vaginas...

oh... no it wouldn't...


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Wed Sep 19, 2012 7:29 
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:D

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Sep 30, 2012 9:10 
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Sainsbury's "Taste the Difference" Brandy Rich Mince Pies

Image

P : 15 : Pretty nice, if obviously mass produced.
T : 18 : Really really good, even for someone like me who isn't a huge fan of brandy.
F : 18 : Full to the brim
S : 17 : Bit bigger than the usual size, but still small enough to scoff easily
C : 7 : At £2 these are getting towards the Rolls Royce end of the market, even with them on offer. £2.50 normal price!

Total : 75

We have a new leader!


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Fri Nov 30, 2012 18:38 
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http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style ... on=gallery

Seriously Independent, is this the best you got? A few photos and a couple of lines each.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Fri Nov 30, 2012 18:57 
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Christ, those comments are like the appalling captions which are added to photos of "celebs" in Heat magazine and it horrendous ilk.

Edit: And what are the odds that the author got a kick back from Morisons.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 11:00 
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Bobbyaro wrote:
Curiosity wrote:
I recall Heston's ones from Waitrose being lovely.

Really? I thought they were terrible, far too much pastry, not enough mince, and they tasted of toilet duck when sprinkled with the pine fresh toilet cleanser.

A trap a number of mince pie makers fall into with their higher quality versions is to use low sugar mince meat which has aged, so is very vinegary. Also Waitrose use far too much pastry.


Had some of these a couple of weeks ago, first one I didn't like but I really liked the 2nd one I ate!

http://www.waitrose.com/shop/ProductVie ... mince+pies


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 11:28 
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I had some puff pastry mince pie from M&S. Quarter filled mince and they were twice the price of the standard cheap ones. Do not recommend at all. However the standard 1 pound a box version are pretty awesome.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 12:00 
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What's this bit for exactly?

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I have recently tried:
Image
Hestons, but not the vile pine things...
these come with a pack of tangerine flavour icing sugar. Quite generous amounts of it too.

I don't understand the formula, so here are my scores out of 10 (out of 20 is plainly ludicrous):

Mince meat - succulent & rich, just about right! 9/10

Pastry - here's the thing.
It's thick, crunchy, and moist.
It has a lattice top!
It has straight sides!
It's dark brown!
Technically, it is not a traditional mince pie, but...
It tastes incredible! The very pastry has been infused, suffused and possibly confused with spices.
As a mince pie fanatic, I loved them. Mrs Dom hates mince pies. She loved em too: 12/10

Price...
HAHAHAAAA!!!! about a billionty pounds per pie. 1/10 (82.3p each. yeah EACH)

Size & weight..
These things are HEAVY. Like 2 of any 'normal' mince pie.
You could stun a goat at 30 paces with one. Any dwarf baker would be proud.
It makes up for needing a mortgage to buy a pack of 4: 11/10 (80+g each!)

So: 33/40 (82.5%) - feel free to scale to your preferred range

They look wrong, they feel wrong, but they taste so right I expect them to be banned in case they cause the vapours, hysteria, and possibly male menopause.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 13:32 
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See, The Independent, that's how you review a mince pie!

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sun Dec 02, 2012 19:44 
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Image



P : 15 : Pretty good, plain but well executed
T : 19 : Gosh, these were lovely, very nice filling and the tiniest of alcoholic fire to them
F : 18 : Packed with filling, not too bad at all.
S : 15 : Good size.
C : 5 : £2.50 for a box, blimey.

Total : 72


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:17 
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Drive by review time, no picture.

Costco Mince Pies. 11 for some price or other, I went a bit crazy in Costco yesterday and all I can say for certain is that they didn't cost more than £241. Probably about a fiver I would think..
Sponge topped, so not really a mince pie, but tasted very nice regardless of that, very fruity.

Ummm... 70/100


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:23 
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Trooper wrote:
Drive by review time, no picture.

Costco Mince Pies. 11 for some price or other, I went a bit crazy in Costco yesterday and all I can say for certain is that they didn't cost more than £241. Probably about a fiver I would think..
Sponge topped, so not really a mince pie, but tasted very nice regardless of that, very fruity.

Ummm... 70/100


worst review evar!!

Trooper you should employ Mr Dom to teach you what to do

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:26 
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Sponge topped? What fresh hell is this?


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:31 
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Slightly Green wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Drive by review time, no picture.

Costco Mince Pies. 11 for some price or other, I went a bit crazy in Costco yesterday and all I can say for certain is that they didn't cost more than £241. Probably about a fiver I would think..
Sponge topped, so not really a mince pie, but tasted very nice regardless of that, very fruity.

Ummm... 70/100


worst review evar!!

Trooper you should employ Mr Dom to teach you what to do


I didn't feel it necessary to go into too much depth, as they aren't really mince pies, they are some sort of pie with mince meat in it, which is vastly different, as i'm sure you'll agree!


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:36 
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Trooper wrote:
Slightly Green wrote:
Trooper wrote:
Drive by review time, no picture.

Costco Mince Pies. 11 for some price or other, I went a bit crazy in Costco yesterday and all I can say for certain is that they didn't cost more than £241. Probably about a fiver I would think..
Sponge topped, so not really a mince pie, but tasted very nice regardless of that, very fruity.

Ummm... 70/100


worst review evar!!

Trooper you should employ Mr Dom to teach you what to do


I didn't feel it necessary to go into too much depth, as they aren't really mince pies, they are some sort of pie with mince meat in it, which is vastly different, as i'm sure you'll agree!


I agree to nothing!

And furthermore a so called 'Mince Pie with Sponge' is no Mince Pie in my book!

Would be nice to see your marking scale worked out by someone who isn't clearly insane though.

ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!
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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:39 
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Slightly Green wrote:

And furthermore a so called 'Mince Pie with Sponge' is no Mince Pie in my book!



That was entirely my point!

Slightly Green wrote:

Would be nice to see your marking scale worked out by someone who isn't clearly insane though.



No chance of that on this forum.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:39 
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Tsk, you guys should have just waited for Custom PC's annual Mince Pie Custom Kit Megatest!


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:41 
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Where is the scale! What's the difference between 38% and 40%? What were they rating? Taste, texture, presentation, what?

Amateurs.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 12:45 
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Hello Hello Hello

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Trooper wrote:
Where is the scale! What's the difference between 38% and 40%? What were they rating? Taste, texture, presentation, what?

Amateurs.


They've been doing the mince pie megatest for years man, they're established and trusted professionals in the field of mince pie reviewing.

They clearly explain their mark in the text for each pie.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Mon Dec 10, 2012 13:52 
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I had one of those Costco "mince pies" the other day, they are kind of a cross between a bakewell tart and a mince pie, they are nice.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Dec 13, 2012 8:29 
Woolworths mince pies. 4 for $1.85 so that's about 30p a pie.

Attachment:
DSC_0193.JPG


Packaging leaves little to the imagination. Lots of ingredients in there too.

Now the pie.

Pastry, not too thick, not too thin, strong enough to hold the pie together once a bite was taken.

Attachment:
DSC_0195.JPG


Filling, not enough of it as you can see. I would hope a pie would have filling all the way in the middle, not 40% of air in it. Filling tasty enough, just not enough of it.

Value: 10/10 for the price, you cannot complain
Pastry: 7/10 Good quality pastry
Filling: 5/10 whilst delicious, nowhere near enough of it
Overall: I'd give these pies an 8/10. Would buy again.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Dec 13, 2012 9:42 
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My colleague removes the lid from the mince pie and asks if anyone is home. Apparently the number of currants stuck to the roof represent the number of people "home". I've never come across this before strange.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Dec 13, 2012 13:48 
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Good review Nick!
Ange, your colleague is mental.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Dec 13, 2012 13:54 
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Yeah. That's not strange, that's batshit crazy.

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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Thu Dec 13, 2012 14:27 
Bobbyaro wrote:
Good review Nick!



Useless for any of you lot however, but it was fun eating mince pies.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Fri Dec 14, 2012 23:14 
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Eh? Didn't Woolworths go bust three or four years back?


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Fri Dec 14, 2012 23:59 
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Not in Australia.

Where Nickachu now is.

Living.


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 Post subject: Re: Mince pie review season
PostPosted: Sat Dec 15, 2012 11:28 
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Nick's in Australia?

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