Be Excellent To Each Other

I don't believe this is even slightly true.

I would show you the project stuff from my last place if that wasn't like dead naughty.

OK the actions were documented in Word but everything else was Excel. And they were some big ass legislative projects (one for payroll worth £500m a year) with completely non-negotiable go-live dates.

If what you need is a false sense of certainty, then MS project will help you get to that quicker and more efficiently

Phone interview! I'm going to show them just exactly how well I can project a management.

No, you need to be showing how to manage a projector; it's like you don't even know the basics.

Make sure to set it to the right sauce!

I know all about sauce working for the company I do, don't worry.

Wow, just spoke to a right cunt of an agent about a Disaster Recovery Analyst job I applied for this morning. First of all said "it's in Birmingham, how would you get there?", to which I replied "it's an hour's drive with good traffic, but if I could work from home one day a week that would be great", to which he immediate said "well there's absolutely no chance of that happening."

Then proceeded to tell me it wasn't enough money for what I was expecting even though the ad said exactly the band I was looking for. And that I wasn't experienced enough because I only spent 25% of my time performing Disaster Recovery work, then proceeded to put me forward for it anyway.

I was too gobsmacked at the time to tell him where to stick it.

Agents are fucking terrible.

I swear my workplace is going to beat me to announcing that I've had enough and I'm off by shutting up shop and getting rid of everyone so I've been frantically looking for a job.

The amount of conversations with useless agents is winding me up terribly at the minute. Some guy called to discuss my CV a few months ago and never called back.

Some guy called me up to see if he could put me forward for a job that was so far removed from what I do that I swear he'd rang the wrong person. That was until I got two more calls from him about jobs I had no chance getting in completely different sectors. I told him firmly for the second time what I was looking for and he's never called back since.

Or they'll be sites you sign up for where a load of other agencies can see your details and then when a job comes along you get four agencies all call you up about the same job like vultures trying to earn their commission.

Even in my job area, which is extremely specific, they can be numpties. The guy I'm with at the moment has found the right jobs, but insists on lying to me about bits that are really quite easily verifiable. But, at the end of the day, he is touting a job I might want, so I put up with it.

I have found some to be great and some to be useless.

Except the guy about the Project Delivery Manager role was brilliant. Kept me informed the whole time and told me all about the company and director I was going to talk to. I realise that is the exception rather than the rule though.

In a bizarre twist of fate, I've now been told that the strategy at my place is to take control of the DC LAN back from the networks team and the reason I got blocked from attending a future manager's training course (one of the reasons I started looking elsewhere) is because they want me to look after the network side of things.

I wish I could take control of the Dreamcast LAN. Good luck with it!

Concentrate on getting Quake back online first. That was ace.

"I couldn't possibly without a significant investment in both my training and my pay packet."

Training has been promised (and I've already done some!). I already earn about the same as a junior network engineer elsewhere anyway. I get a decent payrise every year thanks to the unions, so I'm just going to see where this goes.

I read that as "Thanks to the Unicorns"

God bless those mythical beasts.