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 Post subject: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:06 
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ugvm'er at heart...

Joined: 4th Mar, 2010
Posts: 18887
Following on from another post, I thought it might be interesting to find out how people have got to where they are in life, work wise. I'm sure most of us have done some real shitty jobs in the past!

I've been an office assistant in a printing firm, which involved me walking round with a clipboard on monday and asking each machine operator how many they have printed, and putting the numbers on a chart, that nobody ever looked at. Then for the rest of the week I did literally nothing, this was in the days before internet access on every desk. It was awful, in every sense of the word. I spent most of my time up in the server room with the couple of IT bods, chatting about shit all day.

I've delivered telephone directories, which involved a day of unloading them from a lorry, then 4 days of dragging a trolley round the local streets. It turns out telephone directories are fucking heavy! Only lasted a week there, they seemed surprised when I said "no more"

I've built PCs from component parts, to refit about a thousand stores of a building society. It got to a point where I could build around 80 desktops and 2 servers a day, right from bare chassis, including having to grab all the parts from the warehouse and install the software images on all of them.

I've flown round europe testing GSM modems, with multiple laptops and phones in my hand luggage. 2 hours in the airport of each country, then on to the next plane.

I've been a tester for a CRM application, starting as a bog standard nobody, then ending up running the department due to attrition rather than anything else! Everyone I started with left over the course of a couple of years, so there was little old me, with 40 people and no clue what I was doing.

I've worked for a company that was creating software that was used for computational genomics, basically we were trying to work out how to cure cancer. That was fun but short lived, turns out there isn't any money in curing cancer and I got made redundant. It also turns out that the statistical ability of leading scientists and their peers is in the main, fucking atrocious. I only did statistics at A-Level, and even I could tell that they were basing their research on samples that were in no way representative. You can't say whether a drug works or not based on 12 samples, regardless of the fact that each sample costs you £10000 to get and you don't have the funding to get any more…

I've worked for a large consultancy, on governmental systems that affect most of us on a daily basis. Nobody had any clue how to make the systems work, and everyone spent all their time running from fire to fire.

I'm currently leading a department for another consultancy, and spend my time talking to various people about how they should build software, rather than actually having to do any work myself these days!


Out of all of them, the current is easily the best. The worst had to be the telephone directory delivering!

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:12 
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I'm a computery guy!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 32582
I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, A poet, a pawn and a king!

No, but really...

(long post to follow)


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:13 
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Gogmagog

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 42764
Location: West Yorkshire
Paper boy
Waiter/chef/kitchen porter
Plastics factory
Furniture factory
Lorry loader/unloader and van loader/unloader
Front desk work
Research Scientist
Office admin
Data entry

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:16 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
DJ
PR Cunt
Bank Cunt
Union nutter
Support Worker - Drugs/brains/homelessness/refugees/other


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:20 
SupaMod
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Est. 1978

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 62813
Location: Your Mum
There's not enough drive space for me to list all of my jobs. "Lots" is a fair answer to the question.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:21 
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Lord Humongous

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 42919
Location: The erogenous zone
Shop help
Till monkey
Shelf stacker
Ice packer
Silk screen printer - T Shirt company
Production assistant - Local newspaper
Graphic Designer - Printers
Creative Manager - PR company
Graphic Designer / E-content Designer - Travel company

And on the side: Illustrator / Web designer

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:25 
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I'm a computery guy!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 32582
Oh, if it's just lists you're after:

'Play leader'
Garage Shop
Night shift shelver (Wilkinsons)
Morning Cleaner (Debenhams)
Student Union Shop
NTL Call centre
Agency Call Centre
Computer Shop (Time)
Airport Gadget Shop (Dabs)
Duty Free Shop
IT Techincian
IT/AVA Techinician
IT/AVA/Air Con/Water Cooler/Door Knobs Technician.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:26 

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 5318
Zardoz wrote:
Creative Manager


OXYMORON!!!!!1!!1!!11!!1


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:28 
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Ticket to Ride World Champion

Joined: 18th Apr, 2008
Posts: 11459
You know those salt and pepper sachets in KFC, et al, I made them.
You know printer cartridges (mostly Brother) I made them. The machine was designed for 3 people, there was just me, it wasn't working so I had to manually cut the flange (hurr) off the parts. for 12 hour shifts. With a loop tape broadcast of fucking awful songs.
I have picked potatoes and worked in a mail office for mail order office suppliers Lyreco.
Worked as an analytical chemist for a fine chemicals company.
Worked in pensions review for Windsor Life reviewing mis-selling of pensions.
Developed analytical methods for Gaviscon, Lemsip, Remegel, and Woodward's gripe water(!) at two different companies.
And I currently make chemical and explosives detectors.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:29 
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Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 29938
Heh, mine's a bit one-track:

Paperboy
Barman
Computer programmer (nuclear physics)
Computer programmer (web design)
Computer administrator (self-employed, part-time)
Computer programmer (travel)
Computer programmer (mobile telecommunications)
Computer programmer (travel)
Blogger (self-employed, part-time)


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:29 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 5126
Pot washer.
Sticker-upper of skittles.
Pot washer somewhere else.
Computer support / IT monkey / PC dogsbody
Computer Programmer.
Computer Programmer another place.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:30 
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Lord Humongous

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 42919
Location: The erogenous zone
GovernmentYard wrote:
Zardoz wrote:
Creative Manager


OXYMORON!!!!!1!!1!!11!!1


That was my title.

I suppose the only difference between it being a regular graphic design job is that I was responsible for sourcing and ordering branded products, commissioning photographers and cartoonists etc alongside my regular design / illustration work.

The boss was a fucking mental woman. Out of a team of 6 (including her), 3 of us left in the space of a month.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:33 
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Comfortably Dumb

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 9950
Location: Sunny Stoke
Paper boy (£8 for 400 houses, delivering a free paper that nobody read)
Warehouse order picker
Spreadsheet monkey
Time & Attendance stuff
IT support
IT support/website stuff/development/SEO/proof reader (I only started doing the latter as I kept finding mistakes in all our documentation)

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:34 
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I'm a computery guy!

Joined: 27th Jun, 2008
Posts: 32582
Are Lyreco big into potatoes, Bobby?


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:35 
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Ready for action

Joined: 9th Mar, 2009
Posts: 7428
Location: Top Secret Bunker
I worked in my (Indian) uncles Indian restaurant for my first job. I loved it, I helped him in the kitchen, making rice, and pakora and stuff. When it was quiet he would make curries that he liked to eat and try them out on me and always found it brilliant that I could eat the hot ones he liked that no one else in the family would touch. I think this is where I got my love for spicy food from.

I worked in a very nice hotel in my area as a waitress at functions. I always lovd the weddings and was desperate to go to one there. About five years ago my big sister got married there, to a guy I had known when I worked there. This time next year, my big cousin (who also worked there) is getting married there. She is getting a discount because the general manager recognises her and remembered that about half the guests have worked there at some point in their teenage years :D

Then, I left there to work in McDonalds because aged 17 I would go from earning about £3.00 an hour to nearly double that. Sadly, I HATED that job and left after about six months to work in a shop.
Got fired from the shop (only time I've ever been fired) although technically I think they said they were letting me go because it was after Christmas, for calling in sick on my birthday (my eighteenth! and they wouldn't give me it off!).

Shortly afterwards I started working in a nuclear power plant as a health physics monitor. Was suddenly earning more money than ever before with tons of overtime and weekly wages like I couldn't believe. I spent most of this money on partying. I partied very hard.

Spent the next six years switching between the good nuclear power job on fixed term contracts and then crappy jobs to tide me over 'til the next contract. Worked in sales, in call centres, in bars and was even an assisstant manager of a bar/restaurant. during this time I was offered a full time permanent position in the nuclear power job and I didn't take it due to moving to Glasgow to party. Regretted that for a long time.

Three years ago, I quit the longest contract I'd ever had at the nuclear plant, which was looking like it could become permanent, to start an engineering apprenticeship earning about a third of what I had been earning. One of the toughest things ever but really worth it and now I'm nearly finished my time as an electrical engineer and i love it :) There was a while there when I thought I would never settle down, either into a career or get out of the partying lifestyle and meet someone but I have turned 180 and I'm a total homebird and in love. Aww :) :luv:


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:36 
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Ticket to Ride World Champion

Joined: 18th Apr, 2008
Posts: 11459
DavPaz wrote:
Are Lyreco big into potatoes, Bobby?

That could have been phrased slightly better. It was near to them, though!


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:37 
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INFINITE POWAH

Joined: 1st Apr, 2008
Posts: 29661
Squirt wrote:
Sticker-upper of skittles.


Best job I had as a kid - I got 15 quid for two and a half hours work, and a free beer.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:38 
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Ticket to Ride World Champion

Joined: 18th Apr, 2008
Posts: 11459
Gilly wrote:
Three years ago, I quit the longest contract I'd ever had at the nuclear plant, which was looking like it could become permanent, to start an engineering apprenticeship earning about a third of what I had been earning. One of the toughest things ever but really worth it and now I'm nearly finished my time as an electrical engineer and i love it :) There was a while there when I thought I would never settle down, either into a career or get out of the partying lifestyle and meet someone but I have turned 180 and I'm a total homebird and in love. Aww :) :luv:

Wow, someone ring the Guiness Records people!


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:41 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

Joined: 31st Mar, 2008
Posts: 5126
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Sticker-upper of skittles.


Best job I had as a kid - I got 15 quid for two and a half hours work, and a free beer.

:this:
9 quid for about an hour and a half for me, with the free nibbles and pop ( I was only 15, I think, so no beer ). 18 quid a week then seemed like a huge chink of cash.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:42 
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Kvnt

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 2407
Location: Liverpool
I'm still very much doing shitty jobs, precariously.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:42 
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INFINITE POWAH

Joined: 1st Apr, 2008
Posts: 29661
Squirt wrote:
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Sticker-upper of skittles.


Best job I had as a kid - I got 15 quid for two and a half hours work, and a free beer.

:this:
9 quid for about an hour and a half for me, with the free nibbles and pop ( I was only 15, I think, so no beer ). 18 quid a week then seemed like a huge chink of cash.


I was 15 too... our local was fine with underage drinkers if they behaved. :)

A mate of mine made more money on paper rounds, but only because he had like 5 of them and was up at 6am every day.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:47 
SupaMod
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Everybodys gilf

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 45734
I have done:

Paperboy (Sunday papers too, bastards)
Delivering Betterware catalogues/orders
Early mornings behind the till in a papershop
Working the stationary counter at WHSmiths
Selling suits in the dodgiest retail operation I've ever seen
Development of automated line testing systems for a telco
Infrastructure design/architecture for a bank

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:49 
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INFINITE POWAH

Joined: 1st Apr, 2008
Posts: 29661
Craster wrote:
I have done:

Paperboy (Sunday papers too, bastards)
Delivering Betterware catalogues/orders
Early mornings behind the till in a papershop
Working the stationary counter at WHSmiths
Selling suits in the dodgiest retail operation I've ever seen
Development of automated line testing systems for a telco
Infrastructure design/architecture for a bank


didn't you do telesales as wel?

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:49 
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Fitness Nut...

Joined: 25th Sep, 2008
Posts: 18272
Location: shropshire, uk
I have worked a few..

Paperboy.
Department store in Lancashire did - Shoes, clothing, the fun fair, Car Park, dressed as bear...
Frozen Pizza Company
Petrol Station
Do It All
Time Computers on a Production Line, moving up to fixing the returns...
Worked for a P&P computing, fixing printers, desktops, laptops.
BT Sytegra call centre, 1st, 2nd & 3rd line support - Moved to Leeds
IT contracting for 2+ years.. Doing rollouts of IT to big companies.

Last 10 Years I worked for EDS and now HP. Where I worked on a lot of big Government and Private Contracts. I worked my way up from lowly workorder/design engineer to, designing Comms Rooms, to problem solver to finally an Information Systems Architect. That is where I am now.

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:54 
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Lord Humongous

Joined: 27th Mar, 2008
Posts: 42919
Location: The erogenous zone
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
Squirt wrote:
Sticker-upper of skittles.


Best job I had as a kid - I got 15 quid for two and a half hours work, and a free beer.

For sticking skittles up yourself?

'Taste the rainbow'

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:54 
SupaMod
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"Praisebot"

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 13885
Location: Parts unknown
I've done the following:-

Part time ladder maker - Ladders made out of green plastic which I had to cut. My snot and spit was bright green for months after that.

Disney Store part time - This is the job where it seemed I had the most cash. The store was practically next door to Electronics Boutique and I bought a fuck load of PS1 games every week.

GAME - As a deputy manager. This was like hanging out with my mates, all day.. every day. Good times (Although I'm sure I hated it at the time)

Worked for a bank in a call centre - Got suspended for cheating the system. Only thing is, I'd been doing it since I started there. It took them 3 years to find me out. Hated it.

Then worked in marketing for a government run organisation which was my calling.... until I got made redundant.

I now work as a sales rep for a newspaper that no one reads and I hate it.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:56 
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Sleepyhead

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 26129
Location: Kidbrooke
I have done:

Checkout staff at Wilkinson's
Retail sales at Topman/Topshop
Barman at a golf club
Wine waiter at assorted Manchester hotels
Barman at assorted other venues
Bank cashier (easily the worst of the jobs)
Database systems developer
Database systems support
Programmer/Business analyst
Unemployed bum
Mapper of processes
Assistant Risk Manager
Risk Analyst at a small company
Risk Analyst at a bigger company
As of Monday, Risk Analyst at an even bigger (flippin' massive) company

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:56 
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SavyGamer

Joined: 29th Apr, 2008
Posts: 7093
I worked in a Pizza Hut whilst I was at college, I was a waiter, and I wasn't very good at it.
In my gap year before Uni, I did some volunteer work. I worked in a special school as a classroom assistant, and then went to Sri Lanka and did all sorts.
I went to uni, to study business, and realised that just getting a degree probably wasn't enough to get me an interesting/worthwhile job, so I started SavyGamer as a side project in my first year.
Around about the time of the end of my second year, RPS started letting me do the bargain bucket.
I sort of tried to do 3rd year, but ended up spending more time on SavyGamer, and spending time with my long distance girlfriend. I decided to drop out.
I've written for a bunch of other places, too, like VG247 and Eurogamer, and there's no doubt in my mind that my reputation being boosted by writing for RPS was a huge factor in that.
I'm now making an OK living from SavyGamer, and it's still growing at a decent rate. I also write about indie games for DIYgamer now too, which is nice.
I quite like working for myself. The hours are great (Lie in every morning if I want), and I get loads of free time, and no boss! I like to say "I'm never really working, but I'm always working", since SavyGamer doesn't take up a huge amount of my time, a typical working day mostly involves watching films/tv, playing games, and pissing about on the internet, and just doing a spot of work here and there.

Edit: In conclusion, I've never had a proper job.


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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 13:57 
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Isn't that lovely?

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 8792
Location: Devon
OOOh, jobs, I've had a few:

Between year 1 and year 2 of uni, sold sightseeing tour tickets in London, boring job, but fun people and the tour guides were mostly attractive girls who liked to get drunk and snog you, great fun when you're 19!

I failed year 2 of uni, and had to take a year out, so I got a job working in an internet cafe, helping people browse the web, and check emails and such. That was an excellent job, met my gf there (still with her 16 years and 4 kids later) had so many parties and lots of good memories, even if the owner tried to get off with my gf, and I tried to push him into the Thames...

I left there because I felt it wasn't going anyway, went to work for Tektronix (the people who make colour printers) for 6 months, it was sold as an excellent support job, and I ended up just doing backups and database queries, so I left to go back to...

Cafe Internet as the IT Manager, in 6 months my job went from £5 an hour to £25,000 a year, and I was in charge of all the IT stuff, doing training courses, designing a new website, hiring and firing etc, got made redundant 2 weeks after my first son was born! Which was scary, however I found and started my new job before the notice period was out.

As part of this job, I worked with Procal Harem, MTV Europe, Chips with Everything (appearing on 5-6 episodes), ITV's late night show set in an Internet Cafe, went to loads of gaming events, hosted a trance night every last thursday of the month and that's just the stuff I remember

Working for an Irish company with a London office selling Forex software to banks and stuff, Sole IT person in London, routine job, support salesmen with all that entails, frequent trips to the Irish offices, which was always good fun. Laid off when the new MD decided that all IT should be done from the Irish offices to save money.

Moved to Devon, got a few temping jobs before being asked to work for Barrysworld as a Game Admin, essentially running quake 3, leagues, reporting on them and so on, got asked to help with the production of a TV show for "network of the world" (the same guys that make Transworld sport) called Quake Republic. I organised the teams, ran the games, wrote reports, and then acted as a "pitch side" reporter to give my expert opinion during the game. The show was essentially Match of the Day but for quake 3 CTF.

The Venture Capitalists that were funding Barrysworld decided that they were not going to give them the 2nd round of money they had promised they would, so BW decided to stop, and I ended up working for SplashDamage (the guys that made RTCW and other FPS games) formed from a few of the Barrysworld staff and the Quake 3 Fortress people. We continued to make quake3 TV shows for Network of the World (broadcasting on the internet and in SE Asia), and Paul decided to concentrate on making computer games, and as I wasn't based in London, I got made redundant again.

Bringing me to now, where I work in 3rd line support, for an EPOS solutions provider, our department provide EPOS and Stock Management tills, computers, software, etc for Petrol Stations and Corner Shops and some super markets. Been here since 2005, by far my longest job, but also unfortunatly the most boring since Tektronix.

Malc

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 Post subject: Re: Working stiffs
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 14:03 
SupaMod
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Everybodys gilf

Joined: 30th Mar, 2008
Posts: 45734
Mr Kissyfur wrote:
didn't you do telesales as wel?


Oh, yes! I knew I'd left something out. Trying to sell people portrait photo shoots over the phone.

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