Be Excellent To Each Other

To try and prevent the 'Sports - any good?' thread from being overrun, let's have a nice chat about sweat men in tights. Who would be in the BETEO Wrestling Federation? And which BETEO member would represent them.

According to Pundabaya, he is... Ravishing Rick Rude!



Dimrill is... Vader!



and me, well, I'm... THE SHOCKMASTER.



But who are you? If you can provide some kind of hilarious anecdote or photograph to support your claim, all the better. Alternatively, we can just discuss who would be in the BWF. I insist upon the above three, plus:

Ultimate Warrior (world champion)
Steve Blackman (secondary belt champion)
Koko B Ware (comedy belt champion)

edit: the 2nd best thing about the Shockmaster video is how the British Bulldog won't stop shouting. You can see Flair and others getting a bit antsy/confused by him going on. I love that.

Has there not already been a wrestling thread?

Probably, but this is different.

I thought it must be.

Kurt Angle was my Olympic Hero

I'd probably be the Undertaker because I always wear black. Though I used to want to be the Ultimate Warrior. Though probably more likely to be pre-insanity David Flair. Which would be cool because then I'd soon hook up with Daffney.

Kevin Nash for me. Get paid squillions for doing largely nothing.

Well if we can be anyone I'm claiming to be Mick Foley (as I am fat, although not as beardy).

I will be Giant Haystacks!

Fat, just as staged, lower production values.

I scan-read that as "...Giant Haystacks.... fat... low values...", and became very, very concerned for what you might be about to reveal.

If you have ever slept with a big fat old wrestler, why not write in and tell us?

I haven't, but I've slept with a couple of women who could pass for them...

I'd be Rick "The Model" Martel... pretty, athletic, talented but ultimately never going to be at the top of my game.

Incidently, I used to referee wrestling matches up and down the country. I've met some of my heroes (including Christian Cage and Bret Hart) and my claim to fame is that Steve Corino knocked me out with his clothesline!

I went over the top rope and everything!!

Try telling me that wrestling is fake... oh, hang on a sec....

I'd probably get typecast as The Undertaker. If I can choose, I'd like to 'be' either Cactus Jack or both Bushwackers simultaneously.

I'd be Matt Striker, and go about getting beaten up and correcting people on their spelling/grammar.

When stretching I often immitate Kane's in ring pose for when he makes the fire thing happen from the turnbuckles.

When sleeping I often immitate Chris Benoit's pose.

What, being perfectly still and in a coffin?

That was the implication

Oh, I thought the missus was in trouble for a minute there...

Quiet now while I throttle myself with this belt.

I would like to be Jody Fleisch. In reality, I look more like a ginger version of Mick Foley (complete with commissioner-era personality), and posess all the talent and screeen charisma of Mark Henry (without the benefit of the freakish strength).

That Jody.... does he felch?

Yesterday is the ninth anniversary of Owen Hart's death. Now, who feels old?

I felt old when I noticed that Jim Neidhart's daughter is 26 and hot.

Man, I rmemebember watching that live. With you.

A friend phoned me up when that happened. It was mentioned in passing, not the reason for the call. So when he said they'd killed Owen I giggled a bit because I thought it was just another stupid Russo angle.

Then I was all oh shit.

pretty much everyone's dead apart from hogan and woyyah

and they were the hardest ones on the telly. coincidence? i think not