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If that's not inviting a field day to post multiple images to give you a prolonged and painful erection then I worry about the good people of Beex.

Mind you, there's only so many photos of graphics cards.

20-30 ejaculations feels a long way off at the moment

Quote:

20-30 ejaculations feels a long way off at the moment

So even if you manage say one every other day, that's still 2 months before you get an all clear?

I would have thought once they did the operation it would have been "no more swimmers" straight away?

It's a sad day indeed when not only can you not have sex with your wife when you've got the house to yourselves during a school day, but you actively don't want a stiffy either because of the pain involved.

Someone I know is in The Yemen probably being bombed. I am slightly more concerned than usual.

MaliA wrote:

Someone I know is in The Yemen probably being bombed. I am slightly more concerned than usual.

Hurrah! They are trying to leave the capital.

I guess this technically belongs in the 'Yay' thread but I'll put it here as it's part of the bollockmageddon 'Nayness'.

MEGA FRUIT BASKET arrived from the Union this morning!

Attachment:

fruit.JPG

Hearthly wrote:

I guess this technically belongs in the 'Yay' thread but I'll put it here as it's part of the bollockmageddon 'Nayness'.

MEGA FRUIT BASKET arrived from the Union this morning!

a fitting tableaux of misshapen cocks and balls.

Have you creampied the wife yet?

Shit, I should get to the doctors too. My balls often have "substantial discharges".

Grim... wrote:

Shit, I should get to the doctors too. My balls often have "substantial discharges".

FROM THE END OF YOUR WILLY, not from the actual balls themselves.

Shit, I should get to the doctors too. My balls often have "substantial discharges".

We should just rename this the 'never look in here thread'

Also, sorry about your man balls, Hearthly.

Mate of mine had torsion. They had to cut his sack open, staple his nut into place to stop it twisting, then sew him back up again.

And finally, Markg and I were once told about a lad who earned the nickname Womble* after climbing up a flagpole to untangle a flag then sliding down it and getting snagged on the rope hook.

*One ball.

Author:	Hearthly [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 18:41 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Well I've been given the all-clear by the hospital anyway, apparently my current state is consistent with having suffered a significant bleed after the operation, and it's going to take my knackers a couple of weeks (!!!) to start to return to anything like normality. Without the bleed it wouldn't have been at all like this they said, but the bleed changes everything quite a bit Basically I just need to rest and give them time to recover. According to the leaflet I was given when I left the hospital, I need to try and manage 20-30 ejaculations before submitting my sample back to the path lab in three months to see if my man gravy is sperm-free. 20-30 ejaculations feels a long way off at the moment! It's a sad day indeed when not only can you not have sex with your wife when you've got the house to yourselves during a school day, but you actively don't want a stiffy either because of the pain involved. Grrrrr!

Author:	ApplePieOfDestiny [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 18:44 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
If that's not inviting a field day to post multiple images to give you a prolonged and painful erection then I worry about the good people of Beex. Mind you, there's only so many photos of graphics cards.

Author:	Findus Fop [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 18:51 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
ApplePieOfDestiny wrote: If that's not inviting a field day to post multiple images to give you a prolonged and painful erection then I worry about the good people of Beex. Mind you, there's only so many photos of graphics cards. GTA Hearthly, the Hot Coffey mod.

Author:	Cavey [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 19:33 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Ouch, that sounds chuffing awful, sorry to hear it. Like, ouch.

Author:	Mr Dave [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 21:07 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
ApplePieOfDestiny wrote: If that's not inviting a field day to post multiple images to give you a prolonged and painful erection then I worry about the good people of Beex. Mind you, there's only so many photos of graphics cards. It's ok, it's ok. I've got this.

Be Excellent To Each Other https://www.beexcellenttoeachother.com/forum/

The 'NAY!' Thread https://www.beexcellenttoeachother.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=7130	Page 87 of 150

Author:	MrChris [ Mon Mar 23, 2015 21:09 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
I'm so glad that the worst that happened to me was the first attempt at the operation dropping my heart rate to a point where they had to stop the procedure. Apparently my body thought it had been kicked in the balls. Absolutely plain sailing the second attempt. Sorry AE, there's very little worse than something going wrong with your boys.

Author:	asfish [ Tue Mar 24, 2015 9:16 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Quote: 20-30 ejaculations feels a long way off at the moment So even if you manage say one every other day, that's still 2 months before you get an all clear? I would have thought once they did the operation it would have been "no more swimmers" straight away?

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Mar 24, 2015 9:38 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
asfish wrote: Quote: 20-30 ejaculations feels a long way off at the moment So even if you manage say one every other day, that's still 2 months before you get an all clear? I would have thought once they did the operation it would have been "no more swimmers" straight away? Yeah that would have been my thought on it too, but apparently once the tubes are cut and no fresh sperm can get through, what's already in the system beyond the cut can last for months. Hence they recommend 20-30 ejaculations and then a test at three months. On top of that very rarely the body manages to repair the damage itself and fresh sperm start getting through as well. (This can happen months after the operation, about 1 in 2000 the stats say.) Current ejaculation count = zero. I can see it staying that way for quite a while, the left bollock in particular is throbbing like fuck today.

Author:	Grim... [ Tue Mar 24, 2015 11:27 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Hearthly wrote: It's a sad day indeed when not only can you not have sex with your wife when you've got the house to yourselves during a school day, but you actively don't want a stiffy either because of the pain involved.

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Mar 24, 2015 11:30 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
You're a very bad man.

Author:	Satsuma [ Tue Mar 24, 2015 11:32 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
I was going to put up a link to some pictures of myleene Klass but then I got distracted looking at pictures of myleene Klass.

Author:	MaliA [ Thu Mar 26, 2015 10:04 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Someone I know is in The Yemen probably being bombed. I am slightly more concerned than usual.

Author:	Hearthly [ Fri Mar 27, 2015 17:53 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Well it was back to hospital today, the surgeon who did the op examined me and signed me off for another week. I have some sort of blood clot/fluid collection thing going on, which is what the big painful lump in my left bollock is. He doesn't want to operate to clear it if at all possible because the body doesn't like being hacked open again in the same place twice, he says my body should reabsorb it in the next 7-10 days, in the meantime just rest and take it easy, don't drive, don't exert myself, keep it relaxed etc. I also have antibiotics in case of infection. He said it was nothing to be concerned about, quite a rare complication and I've been unfortunate, but it should sort itself out. But if it doesn't sort itself out I'll need another operation Praise the lord for iPads and beds with comfy cushions and pillows.

Author:	MaliA [ Sat Mar 28, 2015 7:48 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
MaliA wrote: Someone I know is in The Yemen probably being bombed. I am slightly more concerned than usual. Hurrah! They are trying to leave the capital.

Author:	Morte [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 14:25 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Something, something, something [insert plums joke here]

Author:	MaliA [ Sat Mar 28, 2015 23:51 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
MaliA wrote: MaliA wrote: Someone I know is in The Yemen probably being bombed. I am slightly more concerned than usual. Hurrah! They are trying to leave the capital. They left. Seemingly ok

Author:	Hearthly [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 12:42 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
I guess this technically belongs in the 'Yay' thread but I'll put it here as it's part of the bollockmageddon 'Nayness'. MEGA FRUIT BASKET arrived from the Union this morning! Attachment: fruit.JPG

Author:	Findus Fop [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 12:46 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Hearthly wrote: I guess this technically belongs in the 'Yay' thread but I'll put it here as it's part of the bollockmageddon 'Nayness'. MEGA FRUIT BASKET arrived from the Union this morning! Attachment: fruit.JPG a fitting tableaux of misshapen cocks and balls.

Author:	zaphod79 [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 13:15 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Findus Fop wrote: Hearthly wrote: I guess this technically belongs in the 'Yay' thread but I'll put it here as it's part of the bollockmageddon 'Nayness'. MEGA FRUIT BASKET arrived from the Union this morning! a fitting tableaux of misshapen cocks and balls. I cant see any stickers on them but I assume the oranges are Jaffa ?

Author:	Hearthly [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 13:30 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Attachment: fruit2.JPG

Author:	DavPaz [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 13:38 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Classic.

Author:	Findus Fop [ Wed Apr 01, 2015 14:13 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Attachment: apocalippo_redux.png

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 11:43 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Attachment: blocks.JPG Lump not gone, wound still seeping fresh blood on a daily basis. Apparently it's a SCROTAL HEMATOMA but with the added complication of the wound itself not healing. Rang the hospital this morning and I'm to go in for 2pm to be looked at by the surgeon who was originally supposed to do my operation, not the guy who ended up doing it on the day. It's all so much fun!

Author:	Grim... [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 11:44 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Have you creampied the wife yet?

Author:	Findus Fop [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 11:46 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Grim... wrote: Have you creampied the wife yet? tea-bagged?

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 12:22 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Grim... wrote: Have you creampied the wife yet? I'm not allowed to do that until my jaffanation is confirmed by the three month sample. Although the way things are going I'm likely to end up as a eunuch so it's all academic anyway.

Author:	Grim... [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 12:30 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
AE, yesterday.

Author:	DavPaz [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 12:35 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Grim... wrote: AE, forever. FTFY

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 13:13 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
It was the ceaseless PC nerd talk that brought me here, but it's the heartfelt sympathy I stay for.

Author:	Bobbyaro [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 13:15 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
are you sure the doctor who performed the surgery was actually a doctor?

Author:	DavPaz [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 13:17 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 15:29 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Attachment: blocks.JPG No further operation required at the moment, he says it is a pretty nasty clot but on balance he'd like to give my body the opportunity to get rid of it instead of operating to get it out. The bleeding isn't a bad sign in that it means my body is working on getting rid of the clot, he says some will be absorbed and some will be expelled, he also said don't be surprised if you get some substantial discharges from it over the next 4-8 weeks. Yes it's going to be sore and yes it's going to hurt, but he thinks my body is getting the job done. So I've been prescribed more antibiotics to prevent the risk of infection (I've already had one course), take Ibuprofen three times a day, and don't do anything that causes me pain or discomfort. I'm also not allowed to drive until such time as I can perform an emergency stop as otherwise my insurance is invalid as I'm not deemed to be in full control of the vehicle. I also need to carry on wearing supportive clothes (he says my badminton shorts are ideal) and keep a gauze down there to catch the blood/discharges. He wants to see me again next Tuesday to check things are progressing without issue. But basically, as long as it doesn't get infected, in 4-8 weeks it should sort itself out, and he advised me to 'walk like an Egyptian'

Author:	Bobbyaro [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 15:31 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
here you are: ZOMG Spoiler! Click here to view!

Author:	Grim... [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 16:04 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Shit, I should get to the doctors too. My balls often have "substantial discharges".

Author:	Hearthly [ Tue Apr 07, 2015 16:05 ]
Post subject:	Re: The 'NAY!' Thread
Grim... wrote: Shit, I should get to the doctors too. My balls often have "substantial discharges". FROM THE END OF YOUR WILLY, not from the actual balls themselves.