Be Excellent To Each Other

I've watched some films. Here's my three word review of each:

The Equaliser: This film was

Lucy: What was that

The Mazerunner: I really didn't

The Happening: So the trees

What I want to know about The Maze Runner: Why didn't they just make a ladder?

Also yeah I quite enjoyed The Equalizer although it was trash.

Watched Guardians of the Galaxy again last night. Just as enjoyable as the first time.

Huh, me too.

"Nothing would go over my head, my reflexes are to fast. I would catch it."

I watched this last night.

Remove Denzel and the awesome bad guy from the equation and there wouldn't be much left, but as it stands it's a watchable piece of nonsense.

A very underused Chloe Grace Moretz as well, who appears to have gone straight from Hit Girl to Trashy Hooker In Push-Up Bra.

Too long as well, could have easily been pruned back to about 1h45m, and also it was a bit 'Man On Fire' except nowhere near as good as Man On Fire which was fucking awesome.

I watched Lucy, Snowpiercer and The November Man over the weekend.

Lucy: Awful. Even if you suspend disbelief and accept the premise it is built on is reasonable, it still makes no sense and is totally illogical. As much as I love ScarJo, she was a terrible choice as the lead.

Snowpiercer: This was better than I expected. Equally as illogical as Lucy, but actually has some charm to it, so you can forgive that. Too long spent in the back of the train, and then a whistlestop tour through the front, until you are left with a thousand questions on how this world actually works, and then it ends. It's trash, but enjoyable and amusing in places.

The November Man: Standard spy stuff, generic as hell, didn't hold my attention.

Guardians of the Galaxy was awful. It's was basically a kid's movie, and not a particularly good one like Lego. The directing was awful, completely over-edited (each shot lasted probably an average of 2 seconds, i felt that i was about to have an epilepsy attack) and the movie is a never ending sequence of boring set pieces without any juice whatsoever.

I also felt that there was no aesthetic consistency to it, as if there was the need to use every single colour that ever existed in it. Also, it's was also an overuse of green screen, one of the bane of contemporary blockbusters. It completely breaks any kind of immersion. It's basically actors against a CGI backdrop.

I agree with trooper about Snowpiercer. It was a movie that had no right of being this fun. It was quite dumb, and after ten minutes i thought i wasn't going to be able to endure it. But aesthetically it felt like a Terry Gilliam classic, like Brazil. The movie had a big heart.

You're awful.

I watched Captain Harlock : Space Pirate on Netflix on Saturday night.

It looks good but makes no fucking sense at all and has a fat man being comical in it. Because fat people are hilarious according to Japanese film makers.

I think I gave up 10 minutes before the end because it was all just too silly.

Angel (1984) - A tale about a young girl involved in prostitution (seemingly of her own will) whilst a serial killer is um killing prostitutes. Generally a suspense thriller and surprisingly well acted for what is basically a bit of sexploitation rubbish. Not a great film but not a bad one either.

Angel 2 - Avenging Angel (1985) - The young girl is about 4 or 5 years older and now a college student. She hears of the murder of the cop who helped her leave the world of prostitution behind then teams up with some of her old friends to track down the killer. Unlike the first film this is completely absurd rubbish. Not particularly well acted and makes far less sense. But it's so much the better for it. It's really stupid 80s fun and comes highly recommended for that. It's more a madcap caper than a serious action thriller. So obviously this recommendation means you should avoid it like the plague. Coming soon to my couch... Angel 3: The Final Chapter (AKA The Search on UK DVD)

So I'm watching Harry Potter on the telly and I'm bemused by the giant that looks like Lee Evans who is in it for two scenes and never mentioned again or seen in any of the other films. Turns out that he's in the books and in the final fight in the books. Makes the film a bit stupid and even more bloated though init (although this Potter has a more sensible run time).

They cut out loads of stuff that could have helped the overall plot make sense but left in a lot of pointless shit. Such as Grawp

Bit weird that Sony are now not releasing 'The Interview' and have shelved another North Korean movie following threats of terrorism. Also interesting that this comes after the same people making the threats hacked Sony and published a ton of emails and personal details, salaries and whatnot in a very embarrassing episode for the company.

Anyone else think that the hackers have some blackmail material from their hack that they are using as leverage to stop the movie(s)?

Isn't the blackmail material "don't show the movie or we will blow op the theatres"? Seems pretty blackmail like to me!

I thought it was pulled due to the theatres pulling out and refusing to show it because of the threats, which isn't exactly the same as Sony saying no. I expect it'll come out via on-demand.

Yeah, but that may just be a story. If Sony genuinely don't have anything secret held over them it'll be imminently released for download, as now it has all the publicity in the world and they can make a mint. If it strangely goes away forever...

Pretty sure there's a whole load of bullshit floating around out there. Find it highly doubtful North Korea had much to do with the Sony hack, definitely don't think it's anything to do with The Interview.

Well, by all accounts it was the same group that did the hack as demanded that the film not be released.

*hands tin hat* You'll need this now.

No, that's how they control you now...

SHITTTTTTTTTT

I love Google.

The Interview now pulled from planned DVD and VOD releases, with no states plans to do anything with it at all.

I highly doubt the NK government had anything to do with the hack/threats. That would be an act of war.

I can buy the theory that a group of North Korean hackers had something to do with it, but I've not seen any conclusive evidence pointing to this.

Dunno exactly what Sony's line of thinking is.

The film looks fucking awful.

Why?

And against who?

This piece is quite a good analysis of why it doesn't look like the work of NK...

http://marcrogers.org/2014/12/18/why-th ... rth-korea/

The NK government threatening to attack American cinemas would be an act of war.

Of course. But (presumably) hired 'hackers' hacking a Japanese corporation?

The people who did the hacking also did the terrorism threats. So whoever is behind the hacking is also responsible for a direct terrorist threat to the USA. They don't tend to take that lightly.

You mean the people that claimed to do the hacking, of course.

Why weren't they bothered about the new Call of Duty where you shoot loads of Koreans, or Team America where they turned Kim into a figure of fun?

And a puppet of the (BANG)

In a heroic move showing some brave decision making Paramount have decided, in response to no threats whatsoever, to pull all the prints of Team America from circulation too.

"Forget those plans by Alamo Drafthouse Cinema and other theaters to run Team America: World Police in place of The Interview. The Austin-based chain says that Paramount has now decided not to offer South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone’s 2004 satire that focuses on Kim Jong-il, the late father of North Korean leader Kim Jong-un. Alamo says that the cancellation at its Dallas theater is “due to circumstances beyond our control” and says it will offer refunds to those who have already bought tickets. Cleveland’s Capitol Theater also tweeted that Team America “has been canceled by Paramount Pictures.” - Deadline

http://deadline.com/2014/12/paramount-c ... 201329597/

Gosh, Hollywood really is completely spineless. Reminds me of the super-late 30's when they wouldn't show anti-Nazi films in case the Germans got upset.

Though on the plus side I guess this'll mean one hell of a South Park episode.

I am not sure I would call it spineless; if there were an attack at a "theatre" showing this, they would be lambasted to hell and back. Furthermore, it shows unusual character that they even thought it was a possibility and took the lives of these people into account rather than letting them die for the price of a cinema ticket and some popcorn.

Depends whether you agree with negotiating with terrorists or not.

Not negotiating with terrorists is usually a lie.

Yeah.

"We do not negotiate with terrorists!" *furiously negotiates with aforementioned terrorists*

Are you not pleased the little man beat the big corporation?

It's certainly been interesting to find out that the internal machinations of the upper echelons of a huge corporation are far more dysfunctional than I ever imagined.

Is that a euphemism?

Come on baby, free my hostages.

I think it's a publicity stunt.

Films with stars from off the telly that I turned off after twenty minutes as they were garbage:

1) I Origin - with Glenn from TWD

2) Pompeii - with Jon Snuuuur from GoT.

Sick of shit films I finally got settled into Girl Gone.

It's got Ben Affleck in it but don't let put you put cause I really enjoyed that. I Remember seeing a trailer for it at cinema and thinking what a load of rubbish it looked but it was actually really quite awesome and twisted.

Ok, so you could poke holes in it with a stick but if you forget about that and just go with it it's bloody enjoyable.

Ok, fine, quick synopsis to try and convince you: Man goes to work, comes home and his wife missing. BUT WHAT HAPPENED TO HER!? What, you want me to spoil it, you duffus. Watch the bloody thing will ya?

Ok, ok, here's Ian's guarantee:

You will love this film.

OR

You will think it's stupid.

BUT, regardless, you WILL have a strong opinion on it cause it's that sort of flick. Have you a partner/wife/spouse/lover/mistress? Watch it with them and see how far apart your opinions lie on the merits of the film. And if your opinions are the same then HATE YOURSELF FOR BEING A LIMP WUSS OF A MAN/WOMAN WITHOUT THE CONVICTION TO CHALLENGE THE OPINIONS OF YOUR PARTNER/WIFE/SPOUSE etc.

I'm awarding it 8 barbed wires and a pineapple. Cause words can mean anything you want them to. Unless that word is "subjective". Obv.

I loved Gone Girl.

I've recently watched Angel 1+2 so I had to continue the saga with Angel 3: The Final Chapter (at least it's the final chapter until they did Angel 4).

Molly, who is sometimes known as her former prostitute name 'Angel' who has strangely given up on her success in law school to become a freelance photographer, goes back on THE STREET to find out who killed her mother. Basically.

It's a lot more ordinary than the first two films. Largely just a general crime thriller type thing with mediocre acting. Very straight to DVD stuff but scores very very high on the craster scale with a solid 1 star within the first 5 minutes.

'A Walk Among The Tombstones' the other night, with that there Liam Neeson doing ACTING instead of FIGHTING like he does in the Taken films.

It was alright I suppose, although why they put the annoying teenager in I don't know, and Neeson's character never really made a huge amount of sense either. Oh yes and the baddies were just too psycho to really be interesting. Not overly sold on the torture of women either, 'justified by context' or not.

6/10 - Watchable but mostly because of Neeson.

EDIT - Cut by the BBFC for a 15 (an uncut 18 was available), so probably best to get hold of the American R rated version.

'A Walk Among The Tombstones'

A 6/10 from me too. Pleasant enough (thanks to Neeson), but nothing special.

"EDIT - Cut by the BBFC for a 15 (an uncut 18 was available), so probably best to get hold of the American R rated version."

Wasn't aware of that but found out today that the studio releasing Taken 3 have decided to edit the action sequences so that it can be released as a 12A certificate in the UK (instead of a 15).

Taken 2 was shit, Taken 3 has the same director as Taken 2, and now that Taken 3 will probably have badly edited, bloodless action scenes (like Expendables 3), I'm guessing it will be extra shit...

Shame, because the original Taken was great violent fun.

Capote is a pretry good film about the author writing In Cold Blood and his relationships with the prisoners and his own circle. Hoffman is very good portraying Capote, anD I'd probably watch it again.

They're doing to Taken what they did to The Bourne Identity.

I think they call it Franchisementrizing.

Everyone went to bed at 10.30 last night so at last I watched Guardians of the Galaxy.

Really enjoyed it, nice change from all the romantic and drama films I've had to watch with inlaws and wife for the last week!

Couple of new films I've seen recently :

THE INTERVIEW (yes, that one...)

Childish humour, daft plot, but I still laughed quite a bit & found it generally fun. 6.5/10
If you hate Seth Rogan and/or James Franco, your opinion may vary.

SON OF A GUN

Fairly gritty Australian crime drama/thriller (with Ewan McGregor in a major supporting role).
This type of film is right up my alley and this was a good'un. 8/10

Gone Girl

It's was both ludicrous (plot-wise) and infinitely entertaining.