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A charming new gimmick
https://www.beexcellenttoeachother.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=3&t=254
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Author:  CUS [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:13 ]
Post subject:  A charming new gimmick

Hello all. I'm fed up of everyone assuming that every word I say is some kind of cuntishness, especially given that I've been really, really nice in the last couple of weeks, in special private ways that I can't tell you about. Sort of like when Beecher helped Schillinger's son, in Oz. And like Beecher, it's bringing me nothing but pain.

So, I'd like to find a new gimmick. I considered suddenly having an avatar, name, sig etc. that suggest I am some kind of animal (such as a tiger or eagle), as this is quite popular, but I can't think of any I like. Beyond the sloth, and that's not very charismatic. I'm not hilariously keen on sweets or bacon or something. I don't work in any kind of charming location, so the fact that - yes! - CUS is your local postman isn't it. I'm not cute and sexy, so I can't trade on my looks.

My current interests include Eastern European history (interest, mind, I know fuck all really), singing (oh yes), and being too busy working, commuting, sleeping, and trying to stop several people I know from completely losing their own minds, to have any time to cope with my own increasingly debilitating depression and recent serious health concerns, or to even play on my Xbox.

This if the first post where I feel like a cunt, by the way, so well done. Also: please feel free to use this thread to call me a twat, if you can't think of a delightful new persona for me, instead. I would be a fool to not expect as much, so I invite it instead.

edit: And yes, this is hideously self-obsessed, and I'm fully expecting hilarious parody and piss-taking from my firm friends. However, it's this, or every other thread here turns into "CUS IS MEAN :( :(" so knock yourselves out.

Author:  Grim... [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:14 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

You can have a go at being rich, if you want.

Author:  Cras [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:15 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

We love you CUS. Your avatar should clearly be:

Image

Author:  Zardoz [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:17 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Whoa there!

Deep breaths fella, you're with friends, lets all read the banner up top, take it on board and lets straighten all this out for you.

I don't pick up on any ill feeling towards you on here, can you be more specific?

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:22 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I wish I was good at reassuring words, because you're clearly the best person I've met on The Internet, and one of very few I'd call a real friend.

You don't need a gimmick. Don't hide yourself...

Author:  KevR [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:23 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Perhaps I have a high tolerance for cuntishness but I can’t say I was aware of it.

Author:  chinnyhill10 [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:25 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Zardoz wrote:
I don't pick up on any ill feeling towards you on here, can you be more specific?


This. In fact CUS has been considerably less annoying than say, 6 months ago, on the other place.

But I thought everything was cool at the moment and had been for some time.*


* Apart from the death ninjas I dispatched at the weekend to steal all his belongings and then hack him to bits, obv.

Author:  chinnyhill10 [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Davydd Grimm wrote:
You don't need a gimmick. Don't hide yourself...


Woah woah, everyone needs a gimmick. No need to restrict gimmicks, espcially if they involve dancing animals.

Author:  CUS [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Hmm. This is backfiring. Someone start trolling quick and call me a fucker, or this is going to look like some kind of hideous "Awww, everyone tell CUS you love him!" affair, and that's not at all what I expected.

Grim... I like your suggestion. Yes, I could be the new rich guy. I actually worked out last night that I could afford to buy at least a 360 and a PS3 every month, from now on, just out of my 'spare change' from next month onwards, and still afford everything else I buy each month.

What a cunt, eh?

Author:  Squirt [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:27 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Mimi is excellent at the cute. Maybe she can rustle you up a fluffy bunny rabbit eating a lollipop, or something like that, as your avatar.

I don't think you're a cunt.

Author:  Grim... [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:28 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

CUS wrote:
I could afford to buy at least a 360 and a PS3 every month

You'd buy them yourself? You are clearly not rich enough - step away from the gold card.

Author:  Zardoz [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:28 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Why don't you get rid of that crumby avatar and get me to do you one for £999?*

That might cheer you up.


*Your loaded so no bezzie mates rates.

Author:  chinnyhill10 [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:31 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

CUS wrote:
Grim... I like your suggestion. Yes, I could be the new rich guy. I actually worked out last night that I could afford to buy at least a 360 and a PS3 every month, from now on, just out of my 'spare change' from next month onwards, and still afford everything else I buy each month.


Image

Oy, you cunt. Buy a GX4000 every month or I'll fight yer.

Author:  Dr Lave [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:32 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I always took "CUS is a cunt" to be a running joke. You're lovely. BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY.

I second Grimm... you got a pay rise thats nearly 50% of my income so I would to recommend going with the rich schtick.

Talking of which I suspect Grimm... wipe's his arse on my income.

Author:  Grim... [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:34 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Lave wrote:
I always took "CUS is a cunt" to be a running joke. You're lovely. BUT NOT IN A GAY WAY.

I second Grimm... you got a pay rise thats nearly 50% of my income so I would to recommend going with the rich schtick.

Talking of which I suspect Grimm... wipe's his arse on my income.

Just the one 'm' for me, cheers.

Author:  Squirt [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:35 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I reckon Alan Sugar would be a nightmare to fight. I bet he fits dirty, and he looks as if he's made out of leather thats been left in the sun. I bet he doesn't even bleed if you stab him, he just keeps coming without even flinching.

Author:  Dr Lave [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:39 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Grim... wrote:
Just the one 'm' for me, cheers.



I do that all the time I do. My apologies.

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:40 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Grim... wrote:
Just the one 'm' for me, cheers.


Heaven forfend you should be mistaken for a prole like me MR AMUSED FACE

Author:  kalmar [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:41 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Davydd Grimm wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Just the one 'm' for me, cheers.


Heaven forfend you should be mistaken for a prole like me MR AMUSED FACE


Aren't you two brothers then?

Author:  chinnyhill10 [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:41 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Squirt wrote:
I reckon Alan Sugar would be a nightmare to fight. I bet he fits dirty, and he looks as if he's made out of leather thats been left in the sun. I bet he doesn't even bleed if you stab him, he just keeps coming without even flinching.


Alan Sugar probably knows people who could have you killed, so doesn't need to fight.

Author:  Squirt [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:44 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

chinnyhill10 wrote:
Alan Sugar probably knows people who could have you killed, so doesn't need to fight.


Probably. But I bet he does it himself, just for the sheer joy of it.

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:44 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

kalmar wrote:
Davydd Grimm wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Just the one 'm' for me, cheers.


Heaven forfend you should be mistaken for a prole like me MR AMUSED FACE


Aren't you two brothers then?


No, but when I was in Vat Of Fat the guitarist was called Ian Grimm. Hilarious.

Author:  Dr Lave [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Ah, so thats why I do it.

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:55 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I think your avatar, or sig, should be a picture of *my* corner unit sofa:

Author:  Mimi [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 17:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Awwww, what's up, CUS?

I don't think you are mean or horrible, but you have seemed quite stressed, and maybe when you make just short posts people mistake you for being snappy. I've done that before, when I am in a hurry - I am leaving through the door and post a few words and come back and find out that people think I have been mean.

Would you like Monkey and I to find you a cute avatar? Do you secretly think that people with cute animal avatars use them as a shield for being really nasty beneath it all? i do not understand but I hope you are feeling more chipper soon x

Author:  Mimi [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:02 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Also, I don't think that anyone at all dislikes you Grim... Especially not for being perceived as richer than most here. I have no monkey, but I don't dislike people that do, and I don't think anyone here is so shallow to do so either - I think you may be taking people's jesting too seriously.

Author:  Grim... [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:04 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Mimi wrote:
I have no monkey

Bwahahahaha!

And I don't take it seriously (although sometimes I wish I was as rich as people thought I was).

Author:  kalmar [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:04 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Mimi wrote:
Also, I don't think that anyone at all dislikes you Grim... Especially not for being perceived as richer than most here. I have no monkey, but I don't dislike people that do


I dislike people who have a monkey and keep it in a really small cage all the time. It's just cruel!

Author:  ElephantBanjoGnome [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:06 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I currently have no particular dislike for any of you.

Except you. Yes, you. You know who you are, you bastard.

Author:  ChocoboOfDoom [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:07 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

don't worry about it CUS, you're a cunt dear to my heart.

Author:  Goddess Jasmine [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:48 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I thought it was just a little jesting too, but when you ae stressed and down it is easy to take it to heart even if it's not meant that way.

I think everybody here knows that you have put yourself out for them, even if we aren't aware of the extent, and nobody expects anything from you, you have been, shall we say..brill?

I hope you start to feel better soon, I know how it feels to so busy with other peoples stuff and work and so forth that you can't see the wood for the trees and sort yourself out. It is, as they say, poo.

*group hug*

Author:  Mimi [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:51 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Grim... wrote:
Mimi wrote:
I have no monkey

Bwahahahaha!


I made that same typo in a letter to the bank once (actually, twice, in the same letter), and they highlighted it and sent it back with their reply.

Author:  CUS [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 18:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I hate all of you, so much.

Author:  Steve [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:13 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Oh shut up you big softie, and attention whoring cunt.

That is not true. I do feel like I know you well after you several thousand posts on WoS. I thought it was the Ramraider thing that kicked everything off big time. I never believed it.

*edit for spelling I could'nt spell attenetion properly.*

Author:  Stuart Ashen [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:26 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

CUS wrote:
I hate all of you, so much.

Who gave you permission to speak? Git.

Anyway, here's a gimmicky animal avatar for you - a goggly-eyed stoat with a nosebleed. It's how I've always imagined you.

Author:  myp [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:29 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Davydd Grimm wrote:

No, but when I was in Vat Of Fat the guitarist was called Ian Grimm. Hilarious.


You were in Vat of Fat? What a small world.

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:33 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

myoptika wrote:
Davydd Grimm wrote:

No, but when I was in Vat Of Fat the guitarist was called Ian Grimm. Hilarious.


You were in Vat of Fat? What a small world.


I was. I can never quite decide if we were great or shit.

Author:  myp [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:36 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Davydd Grimm wrote:
myoptika wrote:
Davydd Grimm wrote:

No, but when I was in Vat Of Fat the guitarist was called Ian Grimm. Hilarious.


You were in Vat of Fat? What a small world.


I was. I can never quite decide if we were great or shit.


I quite liked it. I recorded some stuff in your old bedroom, you know.

Author:  chinnyhill10 [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:37 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

ComicalGnomes wrote:
I currently have no particular dislike for any of you.

Except you. Yes, you. You know who you are, you bastard.


[waves frantically]

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:38 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

myoptika wrote:
Davydd Grimm wrote:
myoptika wrote:
Davydd Grimm wrote:

No, but when I was in Vat Of Fat the guitarist was called Ian Grimm. Hilarious.


You were in Vat of Fat? What a small world.


I was. I can never quite decide if we were great or shit.


I quite liked it. I recorded some stuff in your old bedroom, you know.


Blimey. Tiny, tiny world. Which band were it?

Author:  myp [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:41 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Llamatron. Ian played keyboards. We only recorded one song but it was 22 mins long!

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:42 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Oh, O Discordia? I'm pretty sure I still have an mp3 of that somewhere!

Author:  Dr Lave [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:47 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

I'm now convinced that everyone who posts on WoS/WoB/BETEO are actually all know it each other.

It's something like Lost I suspect.

Author:  Steve [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:49 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Hey dudes, shall we start a new thread of Metal/Grind/Whatever else bands, we know. This is CUS' topic. I know Gutworm and Gorerotted BTW.

Hi Lave, don't worry, I don't know anyone.

Author:  devilman [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:50 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Lave wrote:
I'm now convinced that everyone who posts on WoS/WoB/BETEO are actually all know it each other.

It's something like Lost I suspect.


It's actually worse than that - they're all the same person. Each personality has their own login.

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:52 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Steve wrote:
Hey dudes, shall we start a new thread of Metal/Grind/Whatever else bands, we know. This is CUS' topic. I know Gutworm and Gorerotted BTW.

Hi Lave, don't worry, I don't know anyone.


I toured with Gutworm. Lovely chaps. There is a metal thread, somewhere.

And CUS knows I love him.

Author:  Steve [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:56 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

They are a lovely bunch of chaps aren't they. Sorry it just seemed like it was going off topic. Who were you with? (grimm). To the metal thread!!!

Author:  Grim... [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Steve wrote:
Hey dudes, shall we start a new thread of Metal/Grind/Whatever else bands, we know. This is CUS' topic. I know Gutworm and Gorerotted BTW.

There already is one. It's right near the top of the first page, and calls out all you 'Dirty Moshers', I believe.

Author:  Da5e [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 19:58 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

Actually, is there any chance of a Supamod changing that? It annoys me a bit. I need to say 'actually' less.

Author:  CUS [ Mon Apr 07, 2008 20:01 ]
Post subject:  Re: A charming new gimmick

OMG, Vat of Fat was my nickname at school!!!

*reads* Animal avatars was just an example, I'm not having a go, honest, honest miss, honest. *literally hangs self to death*

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