Be Excellent To Each Other

ZOMG Zoe Ball! I wuv her.

I also love Norman Cook for being an ex-Housemartin and not ending up in prison for fiddling children.

As for I - I have had a conversation with Ian Hislop at a thing about media and the law. He is perfectly lovely and is A Chap of the first water.

If we're counting celebrity toilet encounters then I've had a piss next to Johnny X from Kenickie. Well, not next to, but one urinal along, as per the Gentleman's Rules.

I once saw Audrey Roberts from off of Corrie being harassed by a tramp by a multistorey car park in Manchester.

Sometime in the late 90s I went to the Roadhouse in Manchester to see a mate's band, and spotted Steve Lamacq chatting someone up. One of my mates went over to talk at him ("HEY, YOU'RE STEVE LAMACQ!") and the girl took the opportunity to leave. Lamacq looked pretty pissed off (although that could have been due to the fact that he's rather short in stature -- shorter than me, and I'm hardly a towering colossus).

A few years ago I saw Angela Griffin in a club in Exeter. She was in Devon filming Down to Earth (no, me neither) and clearly wanted to see Exeter's classy nightlife. But she somehow ended up in Timepiece instead.

Oh yes, I forgot Ian Hislop from my list. He wears a hat and gets the train.

Also, I forgot about the time I couldn't leave a bookshop in The Hague because the front of the shop was crowded with Henry Rollins fans. They'd not been there when I went in, but after browsing for a long time I turned round and found the way to the door was completely blocked. Henry Rollins himself was over the near the window and was either sitting down and is very tall or was standing up and is very short. I forced my way out in the end, lest Henry Rollins himself see me and decide to beat me up for being a fat bastard.

Exeter has classy nightlife?

Malc

I've seen:
Russ Abbott & Norman Collier walking through Blackpool
Keith Harris in Poulton (many times)
Jane Danson (Leanne Battersby - Corrie) in the Trafford Centre. Pregnant and quite bog-eyed.
Ian Rush in Manchester Airport.
Beat that!

Rococo's
Arena
Warehouse / Boxes / Boogies (RIP)

See? Classy!

I have met more famous people (in number and status) than you, Zardoz*, more than most people I guess, but I had an unfair advantage. On the most part, people are nice, there are always going to be a few that have an inflated sense of self-importance, but that goes for us normal non-famous folk, too.

*I know you meant that in an ironic sense

I was trying to think of the other clubs in Exeter, those are the only ones I could think of.

I don't think I ever went into WB+B, but it would have to go: Rococos > Time Piece > Arena.

But none of them are really classy.

Malc

Oooh yeah, there was also the time when I popped into Sound Control in the basement of the Virgin Megastore in Oxford Street 'cos I was looking to buy a new bass guitar. A lovely young lady sales assistant helped me out loads, she was really friendly and really seemed to know her stuff. She told me that she herself had been the bassist in a band a few years ago, called 'Elastica'.

For some reason however I just smiled and nodded. It was only whilst I was on the train heading home that it suddenly dawned on me "Hang on! She said she was the bassist of Elastica? THE Elastica?!? WTF?!? What's she doing working as a bloody sales assistant, etc, etc?!?"

I looked 'em up online when I got in and it was her too.

To be honest, as far as I'm concerned it's Cavern > Timepiece >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> everywhere else. But that could be because I'm still desperately trying to convince myself and those around me that I'm still in my early twenties, and if I wear combat pants and a baggy Skint Records t-shirt I can pass for a lithe twentysomething and not someone rapidly approaching middle age, clinging hopelessly to the arse-end of their twenties. I like drum & bass and breaks, they've been pretty constant over the last decade. I've heard what the kids are listening to these days; it's all grime this and sublow that and donk the other, but it just sounds like noise to me.

Oh fuck, I'm turning into my Dad, aren't I?

Anyway, I've only been to Arena a few times but it reminds me too much of the shitty clubs in Cumbria I used to go to in my teens for me to ever want to go back again; it's all alcopops and attitude in there whenever I've been and what do you mean I can't come in just because my shirt doesn't have a collar?

I've been in there twice. The first time had a nice chat with a couple of lesbians, the other time was really boring.

Malc

I saw Gedge hanging around outside the Liverpool Academy prior to a Weddoes gig a couple of years ago and I was still star-struck by him, and his obviously-dyed hair.

I once told Jim Bob from Carter that they were my favourite band when I was 13. I don't think he was impressed.

I think I too once "cock blocked" poor Lammo - he'd been DJing at my students' union and was trying to talk to pretty young blonde girls, when I drunkenly stumbled over and started harassing him about not playing enough of some band or other. He was quite curt, as I recall, but still nice enough to sign my train ticket. Years later he also read out some of my excellent suggestions of "games based on bands" for some text-in thing he was doing (Lemmings Jelly and The Sonics The Hedgehog are the only ones I remember now).

I keep seeing Boris Johnson cycling to work. He doesn't wear a helmet and cycles in his suit, so he must really pong when he gets into work. I tried to say good morning to him last time, but he was too busy fiddling with his bicycle clips to notice.

I've seen Dan Cruickshank quite a few times as well, including yesterday when he got on the Hammersmith & City line at Liverpool Street and was still on when I got off at Great Portland Street, stalker fans. He's a tall fucker and likes to pace up and down the platform while waiting for the train to arrive. He's another one I'd love to chat with if it wasn't for this damned English reserve of mine.

Gilbert and George are always pottering around Spitalfields and Liverpool Street, I see them at least once a month.

Had a very brief chat with Alexa Chung and Alex Turner in a pub in Shoreditch (I know, I make myself sick sometimes) when some drunken twat was making a nuisance of himself. Alex Turner took the chap over to one side, had a word in his ear and the bloke was as good as gold after that. God knows what was said, maybe he let him have a turn on Alexa to shut him up.

Mike Skinner gave me a shout when I walked out of a pub and left my bag on the floor. I thanked him and asked him if he was going to write a song about it. New album out soon isn't there?

Miquita Oliver, again in Shoreditch (retch). My mate was absolutely steaming drunk and kept bellowing 'Michala! Michala! What's on T4 tomorrow?' across the road at her.

Bruce Dickinson once, again at Liverpool Street Station (you will by now have ascertained that I live in a cardboard box there) he was making a b-line for the bogs, so I thought I'd let him get on with it. I'm a big Maiden fan though, so I hung around outside and then entirely failed to talk to him when he emerged.

That's a good haul tmuk, but the question on everyone's mind is - have any of those celebs seen you wanking?

Unlikely, I'm very discreet.

Bruce Dickinson was on the telly the other day. I switched on just in time to see him talking about how he had been called in to fly an airliner full of stranded XL passengers back from somewhere. I was completely unaware that he has for some time been a qualified airline pilot so found it a bit confusing to say the least.

I don't really have many celebrity stories except for a strange coincidence. I went snowboarding in Morzine and in the chalet there was a bloke and his son staying there, he worked in stage lighting or something and was telling us that the week before they had the young actor from About a Boy staying with them. I hadn't seen the film and had no clue who he was so basically this meant nothing to me. Then a couple of years ago I was at my cousin's wedding and my fiancee and I ended up sat next to my uncle's bezzie mate and his wife who it turns out are the parents of said young actor who is now in Skins (although I hadn't seen that either so still didn't have a clue. He did turn up later in the evening apparently although I was pretty much steaming by then and don't really remember). Anyway I described the bloke and his son in the chalet and they had no clue who he could have been so I guess he was full of shit.

Is T4 filmed in Shoreditch or something?

I've worked at Television Centre for the past year, and disappointingly can count on the fingers of one hand the number of famous people I've seen, let alone met.

If we're counting celebrity toilet encounters then I've had a piss next to Johnny X from Kenickie. Well, not next to, but one urinal along, as per the Gentleman's Rules.

My dad once had a piss next to George Melly. Apparently he (Mr Melly) leant over and said "three shakes and it's a wank!".

I worked at Fountain, which was a lot smaller, but I was a runner and general slave, so was always fetching and finding things for slebs. Probably most famous in a worldwide measure were the cast of friends (minus the one who plays Phoebe)

yeah I read about this it was back from saudi arabia.

Imagine that though, 'sorry, the flight has been cancelled due to the company going backrupt but the singer from iron maiden says he will give you a lift'

Man, he must have been a man on the edge. There he was, a stranger in a strange land, suddenly called on to take the flight of Icarus and go where eagles dare. Still, at least with Dickenson flying you'll die with your boots on. What a trooper.

This thread doesn't have enough puns yet! Quick, use your pun powers, Lave!

I heard he was ferrying out those stranded passengers well into the night - apparentely he didn't finish until two minutes to midnight.

I'm sorry, this is all I have...

It's awful that they were stranded there in the first place. The evil that men do, eh.

Evil? Yes. They do shit like THIS:

The evil that men do. I would bet you a meeelion pounds that a woman did that.

Dude, don't make me google image "man and his dog".

I just did - it's safe. Except for a possible reverse cowgirl....

Or, JESUS FUCK.

ON THE BBC:



AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

I work near the Channel 4 building, and have seen quite a few famous people getting into or out of cars. I was walking past one day when the Osbourne family started getting out of a MPV, so I detoured to have a chat, swiftly detouring again when I realised that it was just the mother and kids, and no Ozzy in sight.
I've DJ'ed at private parties where the Duke of Edinburgh and (wait for it) Anneka Rice have been in attendance. Anneka asked if I could play 'Teenage Dirtbag'.
I've also totally chickened out of talking to Holly Willoughby for fear of asking her to marry me, or something.
Played baskedball with a guy called Kevin Spacey too - he's been in a couple of films, apparently.

Is that the site that cousin Dave mentions on Googlewhack Adventure?

What the fuck? Everytime I used to go up there for a meeting or a shoot, I'd be falling over the fuckers and I'd only be up there for a few hours at a time.

Go hang around reception or any of the cafes near the courtyard for 5 minutes and you'll be falling over them.

Top of the Pops recording day used to be good. P Diddy strolled past me and I also saw David Dimbleby, Adrian Childs and Alan Yentob within about 10 minutes.

How long ago was this? I think the TOTP thing is a good example - there's just less stuff recorded there these days. Alas, it's a bit late for me, as we're moving building in a week.

That sounds like the worst TotP line up ever.

About 3/4 years ago.

My colleague always faired better than me anyway. He was at White City when it was being refurbished and they had the restaurant in a big marquee outside and he sat next to Clarkson, May and Hammond who were very very loud.

He was also up at BH and peered through the glass of Wogan's studio. 10 minutes later he bumped into Wogan in a corridor. Wogan asked him if he was the guy who had just been looking into the studio. Fearing a bollocking my mate held his hands up. Wogan said he could have come in and sat in on the show and if he was ever around that time of day again he was welcome to come in!

No, THIS was the worst Top Of The Pops lineup ever:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-niwpfm90nQ

It is indeed.