Be Excellent To Each Other

I'm sure there has to be one or two people who've had a banning experience in the past, somehow. Anyhoo, here's my gem as of today:




Intriguingly, the users don't tend to treat each other with respect (I certainly wasn't treated very well) and have said far worse things than "I think you should grow up". I also made sure I was on-topic by posting in the right forum and stressfully relating my post to the subject matter in question. But apparently, while it's alright to scream bloody murder at reality TV contestants and on the odd occasion wish for full-on vigilante action against them, it's not alright to bring said warcriers to task for their sheer immaturity and total lack of putting things into perspective.

So, in effect, double-standard-minded Digital Spy prefer for people to be cunts to others, and fuck common sense sideways with a razor-edged spatula.

Oh well!

(BTW, I didn't even frequent the forum that much, and decided to take a peek this morning. Must've been time-of-the-month for one moderator.)

Will take money in order to provide people with "Most ridiculous reason for being banned from a forum" stories for this thread.

It's a proven fact that Craster's face bleeds once a month.

That's his ridiculous ginger beard, not blood. Oh wait, HE'S A VAMPIRE, so yes it is.

Is it a wise idea to play pirate i 1am....tsland now on the other computer as it is aceness, and ol

I... don't know.

I think Mali speaks for us all.

cock off fagballs.

Meanwhile, back at the topic:

Dude.. it's Digital Spy. It's where Heat magazine readers go to continue the pretence of being part of that celeb circle.

Never been banned from a forum, but there was one place where I got a warning for pointing out that the moderators were continually breaking their own rules on abuse of forum members. Never mind that said member was a person who I, quite genuinely, if I saw him on fire, would extinguish it via urination, but hypocrisy is a bitch.

I'm told I've been banned from World of (Linda Barker - Ed), although I was quite unaware of this. For what reason I don't know. It's rather akin to being told that I'm not allowed to smoke in buildings as I had no intention of smoking anyway.

Being banned? That implies you got in. I've had enough trouble trying to register for a forum despite listing more than enough pieces of information to suggest that I might be human. The idea of failing a Turing test disturbs me somewhat.

I was banned from E-festivals for some reason or other. It was alleged that the owner held a grudge because my girlfriend didn't want to have anal sex with him.

I've been banned from lawyers' forum http://www.rollonfriday.co.uk on several occasions. One I can recall was due to an indepth conversation of "data protection" (or "DP"), and "DVLA"... Apparently some of the potential younger readers (university students looking up things about law firms) may have been offended. This amused me greatly.

A latter one was for pointing out that Mohammed had an underage wife, and that this, perhaps, made him a paedofiddler. For a lawyers' site it's surprisingly left wing. But that isn't a particularly unusual reason for a banning anyway, so ho hum. But that's it, I think. I didn't even get banned from World of Linda Barker.

Giving or receiving?

I've only been banned from the one forum - the ones run by Gameplay.com. I'd only posted a few times in reply to some questions that people had posted, trying to be helpful. However, one of the mods objected to me having a link back to my site as it was apparently 'competition' which is pretty laughable. So I was told to remove it or have my account blocked. I assume it was blocked as I never went back - didn't see the point if they were going to be that petty about stuff.

The owner is very fond of taking ladies in an uncomfortable way. Or banging on about it, I can't imagine he has a great degree of success. He's also a colossal twat in many other ways.

Now what did Uncle Grim.. teach you?

It's very 'an uncomfortable place' and 'in the back of a volkswagon'. Your Smith nerdyness falls short by 43 bananas.

I've never been banned from a forum I don't think. I feel sure I'd remember if I had.

Not in an arrogant, successful way. More in a creepy, offputting way. But I digress. Despite my best efforts elsewhere, I cannot recall being banned from any forums.

Is there a super happy bum fun yay newsletter?

I believe it's edited by Super Bum Gordon.

I've been banned from one forum, but I don't think it counts because I banned myself.

Apparently people were very confused about how the only admin who wasn't on holiday at the time managed to get banned.

I got banned from a forum for telling the owner/moderater that bolting a bodykit to his 8 year old ford fiesta to make it look like an XR2 was possibly the saddest thing i had ever heard a 35 year old man wanting to do, and all it would do would be to attract skanky bitches of about 17 years of age.

silliest ban on this forum:

Going nuts, requesting to be banned, going more nuts and then posting weird stuff.

I'm not really the get banned type as I'm more likely to back down in an argument and try to smooth things over as I can't be arsed collecting enemies but I am banned forever from a site that I used to post on a lot. Thankfully I was about to bring all of their regulars over to Peoww so it wasn't a big problem.

Sorry - this is a bad thing because...?

Old school people might remember a guy from hahs digi who got banned from Ultima Online for saying the following vileness to another player (spoilered due to the extreme nature of these comments. Reader discretion is advised)



To this date, it remains one of the most offensive (and therefore best) insults I've ever heard.

They tend to be unatrractive.

Also, on the same forum (I am sure that this contributed to my short lived stay there) I told some 17 year old oik that had jsut passed his driving test that "insurance companies are falling over themselves to get young people on their books, and as a result have some great deals. You'll find that car insurance is both cheap and readily available, expect to pay no more than 200 quid fully comp for an Imprezna (The car he said he was buying with his own money, at 17...). As far as I could tell, he actually called several companies armed with this information.

Is an 'Imprezna' one of those Micras with Impreza bodykit that you tend to see in the car park at Morrisons?

Be good.

Also didn't actually result in a banning, mind, so technically not eligible.

Oh yeah!

I didn't mean it in a bad way... it was a reference to the Titler thing... you arrogant bastard



No, as far as we were aay he wasn't getting any at all. He just propositioned ladies for it. In a creepy manner.

Could someone please come up with a non creepy, incredibly suave way of proposing bum sex to a lady in a bar? Purely for research purposes.

"Look, your shoelace is undone"

BAM!

This only counts as suave if the handkerchief is monogrammed, though.

The same bloke from the Ultima Online thing earlier said that some scottish bird came up to him in a club and declared 'Most lasses dinnae like it up the arse, but I love it...'

<---- always controversial, never banned. Obv because I have a winsome smile or some other Austen-esque gubbins.

Get a better avatar and I'll be more inclined to like you.

I'm not sure if that's an incentive or a warning