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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:28 
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Grim... wrote:
Mr Russell wrote:
So what questions should we have instead?

Would you like to live in this country?
Yes / No

Repeat in every written language that people use, and have an interpreter stood there in case they can't read.


The reason I said there should be a test is because it provides a way to give people learning materials and a reason to learn the things they actually need to know. Like what their rights are if questioned by police, or how tax and benefits work.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:32 
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A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:35 
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Kern wrote:
A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.

That is about as far from British values as I can imagine.

Make her a nice cup of tea, take her for some fish and chips or a Sunday dinner, and buy her a top with the shoulders mysteriously cut out of it.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:46 
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Mr Russell wrote:
Kern wrote:
A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.

That is about as far from British values as I can imagine.

Really? Which Britain do you live in?

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:49 
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Grim... wrote:
Mr Russell wrote:
Kern wrote:
A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.

That is about as far from BritishEnglish values as I can imagine.

Really? Which BritainEngland do you live in?


Feex for accuracy.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:52 
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Grim... wrote:
Mr Russell wrote:
Kern wrote:
A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.

That is about as far from British values as I can imagine.

Really? Which Britain do you live in?

These are things which seem specifically Englishly jingoistic.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:54 
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I can't find anywhere selling unicorn meat and lions are so expensive these days.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:56 
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Kern wrote:
I can't find anywhere selling unicorn meat and lions are so expensive these days.


Like pigs, lions are pretty huge.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 11:57 
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Yeah, fuck The Sun, football hooligans etc.

Take them for a cream tea, out in the rain without an umbrella, and somewhere with a really long queue.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:00 
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Christ, you people are judgemental.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:00 
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I got 15. They won't let me back in at this rate.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:02 
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Mr Russell wrote:
Kern wrote:
A Polish friend is currently going through the citizenship process. I've promised her that when it's finished and she takes the oath, I'll give her a copy of that day's 'Sun', a cheap football shirt, and a St George's Flag, then take her to the dodgy fake-Wetherspoons on New Road.

That is about as far from British values as I can imagine.

Make her a nice cup of tea, take her for some fish and chips or a Sunday dinner, and buy her a top with the shoulders mysteriously cut out of it.


It's raining. Do you:

(a) Stoically conduct a BBQ in heavy showers (preferably holding an umbrella over the grill for an entire cooking period), Pimms very optimistically in hand, with rainwater trickling down one's neck.

(b) Quite sensibly call off the BBQ.

If it's (b), bugger off. :D

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:05 
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But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Perhaps this lack of pride is part of our problem as a nation; I don't see the French, Italians or Germans having such a downer about themselves. It's actually pretty sad because (IMO) this is a great country, and people *should* take pride. Bloody negativity and abject pessimism wherever you look.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:07 
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Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.


It's entirely possible Kern wasn't being serious and was stretching a point for comic effect.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:11 
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Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.

I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:11 
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MaliA wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.


It's entirely possible Kern wasn't being serious and was stretching a point for comic effect.


Oh I'm sure, but a great many people *do* think like that, and we see an awful lot of self-deprecating negativity pretty much everywhere among the metropolitan, post-Brexit chattering classes. It's irritating, frankly.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:12 
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Cavey wrote:
I don't see the French, Italians or Germans having such a downer about themselves.

That's possibly because we're not living in France, Italy or Germany.

Yo, Nickachu! What's the deal in Sweden?

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Grim... wrote:
I wish Craster had left some girls for the rest of us.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:12 
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Grim... wrote:
Yo, Nickachu! What's the deal in Sweden?

Wait. Wait wait wait...

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:15 
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The west germans look down on the east germans.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:16 
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Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.

I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.


Who said it made them bad people?
A lot of people like mars bars or chewing gum, but you wouldn't necessarily laud these as examples of Britishness or whatevs.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:18 
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Grim... wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Yo, Nickachu! What's the deal in Sweden?

Wait. Wait wait wait...


I'm in Sweden?

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:19 
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Cavey wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.
I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.

Who said it made them bad people?

Russ, Curio, you. That's kind of the impression that's given out when you add words like "leering gutter" and "fucking" to a list of things some people enjoy.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:25 
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Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.
I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.

Who said it made them bad people?

Russ, Curio, you. That's kind of the impression that's given out when you add words like "leering gutter" and "fucking" to a list of things some people enjoy.


I said fuck The Sun and football hooligans. I stand by this and will die on this hill.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:30 
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And I said the combination of those things that kern had listed for comic effect were jingoistic in combination when applied to the specific image of British Values*.

A little bit like a Frenchman wearing a beret, a stripy jumper and a string of onions round his neck would be needlessly offensive, but nobody would say that people who like onions are bad.

*And I actually said they were far from British, partially because they represent mostly English rather than British in that combination.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:30 
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Fuck The Sun in particular.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:32 
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Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.
I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.

Who said it made them bad people?

Russ, Curio, you. That's kind of the impression that's given out when you add words like "leering gutter" and "fucking" to a list of things some people enjoy.

And I definitely didn't say that someone liking these things made them bad people. I assume you have skim-read a tad.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:35 
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Curiosity wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
Grim... wrote:
Cavey wrote:
But to be serious, do people actually think 'Britishness' is defined by leering tabloid gutter press headlines, football and fucking Wetherspoons? We're better than that.

Some people like football and Wetherspoons. It doesn't make them bad people.
I'm struggling a bit more with newspapers, but I'm sure there are some good reasons for reading them.

Who said it made them bad people?

Russ, Curio, you. That's kind of the impression that's given out when you add words like "leering gutter" and "fucking" to a list of things some people enjoy.


I said fuck The Sun and football hooligans. I stand by this and will die on this hill.


:this:

Dare we not scoff at the notion that 'Britishness' is better than tabloids, football or chavvy pubs? Bollocks to that, sorry. If this makes me a snob, so be it.

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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:36 
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18 out of 24 questions and you're in? It should be essay questions.


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:42 
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I'm just about to have my lunch, should I make it popcorn and stay in this thread?


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 Post subject: Re: Life in the UK Test
PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2017 12:43 
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DavPaz wrote:
I'm just about to have my lunch, should I make it popcorn and stay in this thread?


I shouldn't bother, I'm busy. :)

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