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 Post subject: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:45 
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Bad Girl

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Quick note: I've only ever watched up to Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift.

I started to watch F8 yesterday. They had a race in a car and there was more CGI than car shown.

Then Jason Statham turned up and I got all giddy and excited at how stupid it was. I was disappointed his character wasn't just called Jason Statham. I'll watch the rest later.

Jason Statham out of Jason Statham.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:49 
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Amazing films

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 10:49 
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It's rubbish, and great.

Craster had never watched any of them, so as an experiment we got him to watch the first one, and then the seventh, and try and work out what happened in between.

I'll let him report his findings :)

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:02 
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Is the answer "Lots of fast and furious driving"?

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:08 
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They're good gawp.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:15 
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MrChris wrote:
Is the answer "Lots of fast and furious driving"?

Well, no - think about the first one - they were ripping off trucks for DVD players.

Then think about what happened in the seventh one. They were no longer ripping off trucks.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:18 
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FAOD, I haven't watched any of them.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:19 
SupaMod
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Excellent! Watch the first one, watch the eighth one, and report back :D

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:21 
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MrChris wrote:
FAOD, I haven't watched any of them.


Same here. Considering how little I care about cars, I doubt I'd make it through a whole film. I've watched some of the Cinema Sins videos covering them and they just seem like car porn and no-one seems to be at any risk of injury despite the ludicrousness of the car stuff

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:28 
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devilman wrote:
and no-one seems to be at any risk of injury despite the ludicrousness of the car stuff


Real life irony lol

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 11:57 
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There is no possible sequence of events that could have happened between 1 and 7 to make them end up doing what they were doing.

F8 was fucking amazing. This was my review:

Well Grim... wasn't wrong about F8 bringing the unexpected physics right from the start
Yay Statham!
This film is amazing
I really hope this goes where I think it will
Yaaasssss
Hahaha wtf Statham
That is not how torpedoes work
That is not how submarines work
That was fucking brilliant

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:04 
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SavyGamer

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5 is the best one.

I might watch 8 tonight.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:15 
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Heavy Metal Tough Guy

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I like the idea of extrapolating the current progression of the films outwards.
F&F 9 : Aircraft Carriers
...
F&F 12 : On the Moon.
...
F&F 16 : Time travel to fight dinosaurs
...
F&F 19: Transcended physical form to become street racers of pure energy.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 12:31 
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Stats and graphs! https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2017 ... d-furious/

Image

/ht to Doccy G

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 13:37 
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MrChris wrote:
FAOD, I haven't watched any of them.


Me neither, but I thoroughly approve of this excellent thread.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 13:39 
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Hearthly wrote:
MrChris wrote:
FAOD, I haven't watched any of them.


Me neither, but I thoroughly approve of this excellent thread.


But there's been mention of at least 8 films! ;)


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 16:39 
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Love the first one! Really like Tokyo Drift apart from the bit at the beginning that's in the USA.

The others are okay-ish in a daft sort of a way, but I don't feel the need to re-watch them.

Except for 2, which was shite.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 16:49 
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8 is brilliant. Like, properly great.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 17:23 
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Hmmm... Perhaps I've only seen up to 7, then?


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 17:30 
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7 was pretty good too.

"Daddy's got to go to work *flexes arm cast into smithereens*"

YEAH!

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 17:49 
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Bad Girl

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Squirt wrote:
I like the idea of extrapolating the current progression of the films outwards.
F&F 9 : Aircraft Carriers
...
F&F 12 : On the Moon.
...
F&F 16 : Time travel to fight dinosaurs
...
F&F 19: Transcended physical form to become street racers of pure energy.


I would watch all of these. You're right though, the series needs more dinosaurs.

It's also nice to see that the rap video bundunkadunks have found work in this series following the death of the million dollar budgets.

I might go back to 5 from 8 and watch to 7. Which one introduced Jason Statham? I'll watch that one next.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 19:12 
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Rude Belittler

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Inexplicably popular dreck.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 19:29 
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Image


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 20:42 
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I think 7 was the first with Statham?

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 20:42 
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Pundabaya wrote:
Inexplicably popular dreck.


It's not inexplicable at all. Did you not read my review? I was quite clear.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 20:51 
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Cras wrote:
I think 7 was the first with Statham?

I mean, technically it was 6, if you count the post-credit scene.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 22:31 
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Firefox wrote:
Love the first one! Really like Tokyo Drift apart from the bit at the beginning that's in the USA.

The others are okay-ish in a daft sort of a way, but I don't feel the need to re-watch them.

Except for 2, which was shite.

Everything you say, I fully agree with. Fully.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 23:26 
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I got 25 minutes into the first one this evening, and gave up because it was utter gash*. And I've voluntarily sat through all three Expendables films.

* and suffered from an unforgivable lack of Dwayne Johnson

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Thu Jul 06, 2017 23:54 
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I've watched another 30 minutes of F8.

So far they've "hacked" all the cars in New York. Helen Mirran showed up (I know, right!?) with the worst mockney accent I've ever heard. Then The Rock literally ran like a sissy girl. Oh and so much hacking, computer screens and computer talk as a mechanism to deliver reams of exposition when they might as well just said "And now we attack a Russian military base. IN RUSSIA."


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 0:06 
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Cras wrote:
7 was pretty good too.

"Daddy's got to go to work *flexes arm cast into smithereens*"

YEAH!


Is that the one where they use sports cars to tow a fucking massive safe through the streets?

Dwayne is so big and muscly that it looks like he can't move so well at times.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 0:09 
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Sir Taxalot wrote:
Cras wrote:
7 was pretty good too.

"Daddy's got to go to work *flexes arm cast into smithereens*"

YEAH!


Is that the one where they use sports cars to tow a fucking massive safe through the streets?

Dwayne is so big and muscly that it looks like he can't move so well at times.

No, that's 5, I think. They're all a bit blurry.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 0:11 
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Grim... wrote:
Sir Taxalot wrote:
Cras wrote:
7 was pretty good too.

"Daddy's got to go to work *flexes arm cast into smithereens*"

YEAH!


Is that the one where they use sports cars to tow a fucking massive safe through the streets?

Dwayne is so big and muscly that it looks like he can't move so well at times.

No, that's 5, I think. They're all a bit blurry.


Oh, maybe, I think I saw it a few years ago so that makes sense.

The Transformers films are also a bit like that for me. I know I've seen some (most) of them but can't really remember which is which, after the first one.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 4:24 
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That's why 5 is the best one.

I fell asleep part way through 8, but because I was tired, not because it was boring. I do think they've kind of lost their way though.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 6:21 
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5 is the Avengers Assemble of the franchise.
4 was tedious, but a necessary prelude to 5.
2 wasn't as bad as I remembered it.
Not seen 8 yet.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 6:48 
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2 has Devon Aoki in it, making the difficult transition from modelling to acting with ease

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 7:57 
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8 was pretty decent but the two nods to Paul walker were somewhat misjudged imo.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 8:39 
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MrChris wrote:
I got 25 minutes into the first one this evening, and gave up because it was utter gash*. And I've voluntarily sat through all three Expendables films.

* and suffered from an unforgivable lack of Dwayne Johnson


Oh, mate. It's Point Break. With shiny cars.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 12:14 
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WHY IS JASON STATHAM AND BABY NOT ITS OWN FILM!?


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 12:17 
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Car Shield Activated!


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 12:32 
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That was some of the dumbest shit I've seen. It had far too much serious Vin Diesel, Tyrese being the 'hilarious' black guy stereotype, Ludacris looking tired and irrelevant, Game of Hollyoaks doing exposition dumps, the angry Latin woman being angry, lots of face-acting in cars, rubbish CGI and some of the worse dialogue ever muttered "That's 2000 horsepower" "No it's more like 3000 horsepower" *close up face-acting* "MORE LIKE FIVE".

But it was glorious, mainly because Jason Statham doing some of the best Jason Stathaming this side of Jason Statham. I'm still waiting for someone to pitch a film entitled Jason Statham.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 13:31 
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Satsuma wrote:
WHY IS JASON STATHAM AND BABY NOT ITS OWN FILM!?


Agree entirely

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 14:48 
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Crank 3.

He has to be near a baby to not die.


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 14:53 
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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:38 
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Rosemary's Statham

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:51 
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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:52 
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The 51st Statham


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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:54 
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Jason Places

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:55 
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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 15:57 
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Statham and Stathability.

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 Post subject: Re: The Fast and The Furious
PostPosted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 16:00 
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Jason Statham's Bucket (With Holes) List

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