Bits & Bobs 46

JBR · **Joined:** 2nd Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 3214

Colour me convinced.

Grim... · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 11:01

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

Cras wrote:

That's not nitpicking, it's literally the opposite of the right word to use.

Look, Cras, this is a very common usage in Wales due to centuries of oppression and lack of investment in education from our English overlords who saw us as fit only for toiling in the mines and followed us around making baa-ing noises. I only escaped after participating in a brutal contest to the death where I almost got killed by Jennifer Lawrence and her bloody longbow. Why the fuck do you think the Pontypool front row were so tough? Training? Don't make me laugh. It's because we grew up under brutal subjugation.

Check your privilege, you git.

It's a recurve bow, peon.

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38464

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

£20 gets you coffe and a sandwich at Pret.

What? Good Lord.

(Also, you spelled coffee wrong, sorry)

Grim... · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 11:25

DavPaz wrote:

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

£20 gets you coffe and a sandwich at Pret.

What? Good Lord.

£400 also gets you a coffee and a sandwich at Pret.

myp · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 11:45

Cras wrote:

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

Kern wrote:

Gah. Was looking forward to having lunch with friends but just realised I've left my wallet at home. Trying to find a wording for a text message to back out of this that doesn't sound like I'm suggesting they sub me.

What's wrong with "I'm a moron who forgot my wallet, can I lend £20 please?".

Lend? LEND?!

I exercised incredible restraint, as a reformed pedant.

Curiosity · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:06

Lonewolves wrote:

Cras wrote:

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

Kern wrote:

Gah. Was looking forward to having lunch with friends but just realised I've left my wallet at home. Trying to find a wording for a text message to back out of this that doesn't sound like I'm suggesting they sub me.

What's wrong with "I'm a moron who forgot my wallet, can I lend £20 please?".

Lend? LEND?!

I exercised incredible restraint, as a reformed pedant.

Some people are pedants. Get over it.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:12

MrChris wrote:

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

"The others died. Mysteriously."

Grim... · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:13

MrChris wrote:

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

That's four characters. Good work.

Grim... · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:14

"For hire - super lawyer. Never bettered."

DBSnappa · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:15

For hire - cod lawyer. Never battered

myp · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:16

For hire - hop lawyer. Never bittered

Kern · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:17

I would throw out every candidate that included a hashtag in their answer. And then sack the guy who suggested that question.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

I'm the only person in the world who isn't unique.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

MrChris wrote:

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

I don't know the difference between borrow and lend.

I have my own website that announces whether I'm at a given event

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38464

"Ken sent me"

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

Cras wrote:

MrChris wrote:

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

I don't know the difference between borrow and lend.

?

Quote:

I have my own website that announces whether I'm at a given event

Ha! That might be a goer.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:31

"I saw the line around the corner and thought you were selling drugs" - shows your Comittments does that.

Findus Fop · **Joined:** 14th May, 2009 **Posts:** 4300

I've posted on an internet forum 27,363 times. Hire me.

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

"Genetic diversity due to random mutations and epigenetic modification of expression of genes by environmental and other factors. And I’m a snowflake."

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

"Born with the unique ability to pluck any object from the air at will, I would not only try to catch your eye, I would succeed spectacularly."

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

I wanted to be a palaeontologist but dad said "no", so now I'm trapped being a lawyer and frankly just want the cash

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 12:48

'I am the one who knocks'

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

MrChris wrote:

Cras wrote:

MrChris wrote:

Job application question - "In 150 characters or fewer, tell us what makes you unique. Try to be creative and say something that will catch our eye!"

FFS.

I don't know the difference between borrow and lend.

?

viewtopic.php?p=892853#p892853

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

That was Gaywood, not me, you muppet.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

Well yes, I know that, but...never mind.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 13:00

MrChris wrote:

I wanted to be a palaeontologist but dad said "no", so now I'm trapped being a lawyer and frankly just want the cash

MrChris · **Joined:** 1st Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 30498

I love that one.

Bobbyaro · **Joined:** 18th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 11843

"If you are reading this and haven't already made up your mind, don't bother contacting me."

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

"I'm choosy. So you be creative and try and catch my eye"

Doctor Glyndwr · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 32619

"I'm not applying for a job at Twitter, so fuck off with your trendy hipster bullshit."

Unless you are applying for a job at Twitter, that is.

Grim... · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 13:45

Is it online? If so - ASCII art.

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

Or a dick pic

DavPaz · **Joined:** 27th Jun, 2008 **Posts:** 38464

Grim... wrote:

Is it online? If so - ASCII art.

I like this one I just saw on reddit.

ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Bobbyaro · **Joined:** 18th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 11843

Or tell a really long joke, but don't put in the punchline and say that you will tell them the punchline at the interview.

MaliA · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 14:34

Ffs. Looks like I have a 90 minute meeting starting at half four tomorrow. In Birmingham gham. So I won't get back until past half nine. First meeting is at 3pm so I might wfh then go in for that time.

KovacsC · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 14:55

Just booked a long weekend trip to Iceland, I want to see the Northern lights

Mimi · **Joined:** 27th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 25594

MrChris wrote:

I wanted to be a palaeontologist but dad said "no", so now I'm trapped being a lawyer and frankly just want the cash

I was telling Russell the other day that I wanted to Palaeontologist! Let's quit these high flying, good paying jobs (you) and dig stuff, and use tiny brushes to clean things, and build dinosaurs like giant lego, hoorah!!!

Mr Russell · **Joined:** 6th Apr, 2008 **Posts:** 12243

DBSnappa · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 18:14

Grim... wrote:

Is it online? If so - ASCII art.

Or, if you don't want the job, answer it all in emoticons. Then if they offer you the job, run a fucking mile

Goddess Jasmine · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 18:32

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

Cras wrote:

That's not nitpicking, it's literally the opposite of the right word to use.

Look, Cras, this is a very common usage in Wales due to centuries of oppression and lack of investment in education from our English overlords who saw us as fit only for toiling in the mines and followed us around making baa-ing noises. I only escaped after participating in a brutal contest to the death where I almost got killed by Jennifer Lawrence and her bloody longbow. Why the fuck do you think the Pontypool front row were so tough? Training? Don't make me laugh. It's because we grew up under brutal subjugation.

Check your privilege, you git.

I read this entire post in your voice.

myp · **Posted:** Tue Feb 16, 2016 18:46

Goddess Jasmine wrote:

Doctor Glyndwr wrote:

Cras wrote:

That's not nitpicking, it's literally the opposite of the right word to use.

Look, Cras, this is a very common usage in Wales due to centuries of oppression and lack of investment in education from our English overlords who saw us as fit only for toiling in the mines and followed us around making baa-ing noises. I only escaped after participating in a brutal contest to the death where I almost got killed by Jennifer Lawrence and her bloody longbow. Why the fuck do you think the Pontypool front row were so tough? Training? Don't make me laugh. It's because we grew up under brutal subjugation.

Check your privilege, you git.

I read this entire post in your voice.

Could you read it from a mile away?

MaliA · **Posted:** Wed Feb 17, 2016 9:25

Standing on the train to brum. Boo.

Dr Zoidberg · **Joined:** 15th Oct, 2010 **Posts:** 5157

That's a long way to be on your feet. Hope some of the other passengers bugger off early.

Mimi · **Joined:** 27th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 25594

Yesterday I bought a new teapot online, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it.

At first I couldn't get to sleep because I couldn't stop thinking about it, then I dreamed about it, and today I woke up ridiculously excited about it's impending arrival.

I just realised I must have slipped back into my reverie, whilst Baby Codd lays in his bouncer, playing with his Baby iPod, because the postman knocked at the door with a parcel (not my teapot, which won't arrive until at least the weekend) and realised I had been thinking about it again.

I have just ordered some coloured pencils. I wonder if the'll knock thoughts of the teapot out of my mind?

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

SPLITTERISING THE IPHONE STUFFS

Cras · **Joined:** 30th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 49232

AS YOU WERE. THANK YOU FOR YOUR CO-OPERATION, CITIZEN

KovacsC · **Posted:** Wed Feb 17, 2016 13:00

that was seamless

DBSnappa · **Posted:** Wed Feb 17, 2016 13:43

Grim... wrote:

Is it online? If so - ASCII art.

I believe someone on alt.digi did an ASCII version of goatse.cx
Obviously more than 150 characters...

Mimi · **Joined:** 27th Mar, 2008 **Posts:** 25594

This is my favourite scent: http://m.boots.com/h5/cat_hub?unCountry ... l_1507917/

It fills me with happiness.

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits & Bobs 46
A new B&B for a new year !

Who is online

Be Excellent To Each Other

Bits & Bobs 46 A new B&B for a new year !

Who is online

Bits & Bobs 46
A new B&B for a new year !