Be Excellent To Each Other

You should've seen te fun that I had last week. Started it up to play with myp, dragging him out of rocket league. Only to see it spend 30 minutes or so 'preparing to download'.

Once it had, we had a quick look at the halloween quests and then ignored them. For they be daft.

It's my online persona, init, I'm crap at computers.

But in a surprised twist revealed at the forum's end, I was actually Bob Lorenzo. Just a guy, but I worked at PC World on the KnowHow department for a week in the summer of '97.

The Kaken King?

Hey, I'm reasonable at Halo; I'm reasonable at CoD and I'm reasonable at shooting games in general. So why did I just get absolutely wreaked in the crucible?

I could literally kill nothing despite having some weapon that spits out laser bullets and vibrates the pad like a rampant rabbit on max setting.

And not because I hadn't lined the red dot over a players avatar, neither. I'd zap pow before falling over dead and I can see the opposing players health bar at only half health, so what the crap is happening?

I'm level 6 - does that mean I'm going to get crushed every time until I've reached the fucking level cap or picked up some crackers gun that I couldn't use anyway as I'm level bloody 6.

I "could" level straight up to level 25 so I can do The Tekken Armor King missions (thanks to some downloadable jimjam that you get with TTK edition) but I ain't doing that. I'm playing the game how it's supposed to be played, right, not skipping the whole game to play the latest DLC.

Also, why do I do a mission, complete the mission and zap back to the ship automatically so I can choose another mission that's in exactly the same place as I was so I zap back to the start of the map I've just been on but miles away from the point in the map where I should be to start the next mission had I not been zapped back to the ship menu and the game had just left me alone where I was? That's a long sentence, but the loading times are so tediously long that zapping me about through menus is a bit of a pain in the arse. It'd give Bloodborne's loading times a run for the money before they got patched.

Also, only two weapons? I don't mind that but, fuck me, I don't half run out of bullets for the second weapon all the time and if that happens I've only got one gun to play with. One friggin gun. A gun I cannot swap on the fly as you can't pick me baddies guns and if you want to swap to one of the TWELVE GUNS that you can have in reserve you have to open the world's slowest menu systems ever, change gun, exit menu. I'm amazed there isn't some better hot key/radial dial system of changing weapons in reserve. It's fucked. Especially if I'm down to one weapon cause I've run out of "special" bullets and I'm close to the baddies and need to get some distance between me and them as my primary weapon is a mid-range assault rifle and I need something with more umpf. I "could" be fiddling with a menu to find a good weapon on the fly or I could fucking pause the game and find a weapon totally ruining any of the drama that was previously unfolding. Or, y'know, give me some fucking shotgun shells you stingy fucks.

There are 3 , the 3rd is a 'heavy' weapon , during the normal match you should get a warning that there is a heavy weapon drop 'soon' and everyone else goes and grabs the heavy weapon ammo.

The gun leveling is immaterial for the multiplayer side - something I found out when i got a new 'super special' weapon - equipped it to find it was useless

Yeah, I've got the third slot appear at level 7 (or . Apparently it holds a rocket launcher. I imagine I'm never going to get the choice of having, say, 3 pistols or something.

I've done a couple more levels and it's quite fun this. I had my first online but where a thing came down and me and two randoms guarded against a mass of baddies for 5 minutes whilst Nolan North hacked it. Quite enjoyed a couple of randoms showing up as it happens as it was getting a bit bland on my own. They apparently didn't want to do my mission however as they left with their Nolan North's. Fuck em.

Anyhoo, then I started to get pissed off.

The mission structure for the last 3 fucking missions is this:

1) Start on map run to start of mish.
2) Walk through mish blowing up baddies.
3) Reach a dead end.
4) The Nolan North hacks something.
5) Swarm of baddies attack whilst the Nolan North hacks.
6) I kill baddies.
7) Mish ends.

Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.

I swear to almighty God if the Nolan North hacks something whilst I get attacked in the next mish I'mma snap this disc. That was their Grand Idea!? They couldn't think of ANOTHER way to end a mish. Lazy, lazy cunts.

And seriously, if old Dinklage was any more deadpan than the Nolan North I'd have seriously welcomed a fun bit of auto-enucleation than listen to him drone on about just the worst shit ever made in a sci-fi game.

Stop playing it on your own, you idiot. Rope in a myp and a Mr Dave.

When are you fannies doing some Destinying next then? Can we do my/our/your story missions or do you have to just do random shit? Does it matter what level I am? I'm level 8 what level are your levels at? Do I need to unlock raids? What level are raids unlocked? What is a raid? How come I don't see many of those loot containers about? Should I go looking for loot or just stick to exploding faces for loot?

We can do your story missions, no problem. I'll create a new character as my current one is level 26 I think. You unlock raids later and also patrols and some other stuff. Explode faces for loot is my advice, there aren't many containers that I've found anyway.

I'm free Wed/Thurs if that's any good for you? Dave?

I believe wednesday is good for me.

No way!

Rude. You could just say "no thank you."

Since when do we have a calendar? My mind is officially blown.

Fucking ages. The fact that no-one noticed it appearing in the menu was my own personal in-joke.

Thank you so much, btw. Much appreciated.

Menu?

Top right of every page.

Of not mobile skin.

Which given it doesn't work on my phone affects me little.

And here"s the point it being 3 player only for the game modes I enjoy screws us, naturally.

Can we do raids yet? I think they're up to 6.

I darevsay a level 20 raid will be out of reach for an Ian.

Dammit, I'll play some tonight and see what I can level up to.

So if we have too many people I can drop out (I wont be around until later anyway)

Bah, it shouldn't come to that. What if we have five?

You bringing your date?

Wookie might join us - does sometimes.

Sexy. I wish you both the best in your new life together.

Its quite likely that I will join if it doesn't fuck the numbers..

So most of the basic game stuff is for 3 , however the multiplayer crucible stuff is 3v3 or 6v6 so we can play those

But Dave doesn't enjoy those modes so bleh.

Raids and strikes might just be too hard for newbs at the mo. Might be worth us getting Sat levelled up as much as he can then we all tackle something hard later.

It's rubbish - I don't want anyone left out really.

I'm level 9 now, bitches.

I'm scanning some cracks. Fnaar, fnaar.

I'm level 29. Level cap is 40.

Strikes are 3 player only anyway. Beyond raids (which are hard), there's only competitive stuff. Which I did not gel with last time. I'd give it another go, but probably still dislike. (or not play and cry as myps level deviates more from mine)

Teehee

I'd create a new character to play through with Sat anyway.

I'm level 10, bitches.

I'll do a couple more later. It gets a bit samey on your own after a level or two.

This time I defeated swarms of baddies in a dead end AND THEN ghost did some hacking! Ho-Ho! It's, like, totally different to anything that's come before.

The menu is on the bottom right of mobile pages.

Pft. Like I go to the bottom of the pages like some kind of pleb.

Also: Still doesn't work even with that link

Tell Gazchap.

Here's an article Sat will agree with 100% http://www.eurogamer.net/articles/2015- ... -than-halo

Question: at what level are the characters that you intend to play with tonight?

Depends who wants to play.

I have a level 10ish guy and a level 30ish dude.

I haven't played it since we played it, so I'm stuck at 12 or 13 or whatever I was.

Ok, stay with that. I'll get mine up to that level - I suggest Dave does too.

I will try

Don't do or get it done. There is no maybe

Destiny?

It's GTA Wednesday