Be Excellent To Each Other

Game of the season, I'm going, no one else is interested but I dont give a fuck.
2-0 martins and barton, rhyming scorers.

Come on the TOON!!!! like

It's not even the best Premiership local derby of the day!

we (boro) don't get to have a derby. The tv seem to think that boro V mackems or boro V barcodes is a derby, but you ask a mackem or a barcode if it is and they will snort and say, "nah man, thas only won daaaarby in the nooorth east, like, canny lad". So we're punished by having our local rivals (the monkey hangers and er, Darlo) in the lower leagues. Christ even Leeds used to be called a derby but they ran off to hide in league one cos they were scared.

Come on Hartlepool, pull yer socks up and get to the prem, we want a proper derby!

like

Well try being Bournemouth. We're the sadly neglected younger brother of Pompey and Stains, who are always scrapping.

er... brighton? how close is that?

Plymouth Gargoyle?

It's on the south coast. Shame it's about 100 miles east.

Getting colder. About 120 miles west.

Our nearest league rivals are Yeovil Town, but they're now a division above us.

I suppose our nearest local rivals would be Weymouth. They're only a division below us now. How depressing.

Ah, the Tranmere of the South Coast.

Steady on.